Cozy Obsession

A loud honking noise pierced through the parking lot, causing an excruciatingly loud racket. The scabs on his knuckles, which had just begun to heal, were torn open once again. As the echo of the lingering sound faded, a silence as lonely as the dawn streets settled in the air. The atmosphere was precarious, like it could shatter at any moment, and he was like a wounded beast. If it had been right after he first fell here, he might have trembled in fear of getting hit. But now, the terror-stricken cries didn’t rise up his throat. Only a sense of regret spread within his chest.Even though he was sitting within arm’s reach, Yiheon didn’t touch him. Despite everything, he felt cherished. It was a mix of emotions that rippled through his heart.“I wanted to go to the lake park and see the cherry blossoms with you,” Heemin said in a low voice. Yiheon slowly raised his head, meeting Heemin’s gaze with eyes as dark as a forest at night. After holding his gaze for a while, Heemin continued speaking.“I had no other way to come out… you wouldn’t spend time with me otherwise… I had no choice.”“So you decided to run away?” Yiheon’s eyes glinted coldly, showing his utter lack of forgiveness.“I called you. I asked you to come get me. Where else would I go? Your home is my home. I just came out for some fresh air.”It was best to smile brightly in such situations. Seeing Heemin answer with a smiling face, Yiheon scoffed in disbelief. After lowering his head briefly to contain his rising anger, Yiheon swept his hair back roughly and demanded.“If you wanted fresh air so badly, why did you come to the hospital? What are you up to this time?”“Well…”“Well, what?” Yiheon pressed for an answer when Heemin hesitated.“When we kissed last time… I passed out. I came to fix that. To get treated for the trauma.”Yiheon’s expression subtly changed, seemingly taken aback by the unexpected answer. Though his lips remained tightly shut, the sharpness in his eyes softened, like a dulled blade. Tilting his head, as if to hear more, Heemin relaxed a bit and spoke in a more comfortable tone.“I came here instead of another hospital because Dr. Eunkyung knows all about ‘Seo Heemin’s’ past. I thought I could get treated faster and better. With a new doctor, I’d have to explain everything all over again.”Heemin could feel Yiheon’s gaze on his cheek. He met Yiheon’s eyes carefully, gauging his reaction. Every time he mentioned “trauma,” Yiheon’s expression softened. Even if it was a dirty trick, he had to mention it to pierce through Yiheon’s tough heart. Heemin spoke again to the silently observing Yiheon.“I only have you. Do I need to kiss you first again for you to believe me?”“What you did back then was…”Yiheon, who had been silent, started to speak. Heemin looked at him questioningly as he trailed off, but Yiheon continued in a slightly lighter tone.“It wasn’t a kiss. It was a peck.”“Is that important? Isn’t it more important that I made the first move?”Unbelievable. So, would he only believe a true kiss of love, not a peck? He was not Sleeping Beauty. Was he joking?“What’s that?” Yiheon pointed to a black plastic bag on Heemin’s thigh, making him huff in exasperation.“It’s tteokbokki and kimbap. I bought it because I skipped lunch. I was going to eat it later.”He opened the bag to show the aluminum-foiled kimbap and the tteokbokki in a square disposable plastic container. For some reason, Yiheon’s brows furrowed at the sight of the packaged food.“Let’s go.”Yiheon, fastening his seatbelt, started driving. He didn’t set the destination on the GPS, suggesting he intended to head straight home. It would be a lie to say he wasn’t disappointed, but after a tense back-and-forth, he felt tired and very hungry. Instead of pleading to go to the lake park, Heemin sank deep into the seat and closed his eyes.“Huh? Aren’t we going home?”After some time, Heemin realized they were entering the parking lot of Lake Park. He asked in confusion, and Yiheon replied in a low voice.“I didn’t want the car to smell like kimbap, so I brought you here to eat it quickly.”He should have just honestly said he wanted to go on a date. A faint smile spread on Heemin’s lips. No matter how angry he got or threatened revenge, Yiheon loved Seo Heemin deep down.He was finally sure. If he kept persuading him bit by bit like today, he could bring back Yiheon’s kind self from the past. The parking lot was quite empty as it was a weekday afternoon. As soon as they got out of the car, Yiheon extended his hand.“Hold on.”“I told you, I’m not running away.”“I don’t trust you, so hold on.”With guilt in his heart, Heemin took his hand. The warmth of Yiheon’s hand, which was hard to believe belonged to the icy Cha Yiheon, tightly intertwined with his fingers. Maybe it was because of the strong grip or the determination to never let go, but Heemin felt his heart tighten as if it was being squeezed by a thin string.Led by Yiheon, they followed the crowd towards the park entrance. With each step, the spring breeze softly enveloped his entire body. The joy of freedom, different from walking around the hospital neighborhood, surged through his chest.The blue sky with floating clouds, the pink cherry blossoms in full bloom, the gentle air, the brilliant sunlight, and the silver-scaled lake. Everything was beautiful. It was worth the trouble of going for a walk. Heemin, resenting his frail body that couldn’t walk long, led Yiheon to a bench by the empty lake.“It’s so nice.”The entire view of the lake surrounded by blooming cherry trees came into sight.They had only found the nearest bench, but surprisingly, they ended up in a prime spot.Heemin, who couldn’t stop looking around in awe, began to take out the packaged food from the bag with a satisfied expression.“Oh no.”There was only one pair of chopsticks.It seemed they had only included one pair since it was a single serving.Not wanting to be selfish and eat alone, Heemin snapped the wooden chopsticks in half.“Here.”He handed Yiheon one of the now-short chopsticks, resembling a stubby pencil.Ignoring Yiheon’s reluctant expression, he removed the plastic wrap from the container. The spicy aroma of tteokbokki filled the air.Using the short chopsticks, Heemin picked up a piece of kimbap, dipped it in the tteokbokki sauce, and took a bite. The spicy seasoning and the savory taste of tuna spread in his mouth.“Why aren’t you eating? It’s good. Are the chopsticks uncomfortable? Should I feed you?”Feeling particularly good about their walk, Heemin decided to offer a special service. He picked up a piece of tteokbokki, fully coated in sauce, and offered it to the stiffly sitting Yiheon.“Come on, say ‘ah’.”“…”“Hurry up, say ‘ah’.”Yiheon’s eyes wavered as he stared at the bright red tteok. It was a bit soggy, but still edible. However, his tightly closed lips showed no sign of opening.“If you don’t want it, never mind.”Heemin was about to retract his hand when Yiheon suddenly took the piece of tteokbokki like a baby bird accepting food from its mother.Heemin’s eyes widened.“How is it? Tasty?”Chewing and swallowing the tteokbokki with a serious expression, Yiheon bluntly replied, “It’s too soggy.”“But it’s delicious because I gave it to you, right?”The tteokbokki was thoroughly soaked in red sauce. Even though it was a bit soggy from sitting too long, Yiheon accepted it because it was from the person he loved. There was no way it could taste bad. Feeling playful, Heemin picked up another piece of kimbap and said to him, “Try this too. It’s twice as delicious when dipped in the tteokbokki sauce.”He dipped the kimbap in the red sauce and carefully brought it to Yiheon’s mouth.“Say ‘ah’.”With a sigh, Yiheon, realizing Heemin wouldn’t give up, accepted the kimbap.“Isn’t it much better?”“You eat now. Stop feeding me.”“You feed me.”Heemin, wanting to see Yiheon awkwardly using the short chopsticks with his large hands, asked with an unusually playful tone.A man with functioning hands and eyes asking another man to feed him was unheard of.In reality, it would have been an embarrassing request even as a joke.But in this world, where two men could openly show affection, Heemin’s curiosity and desire for amusement outweighed any embarrassment.He tilted his chin up and opened his mouth wide.“Ah.”“…”“Hurry. I’m hungry.”“You really are…”Shaking his head in disbelief, Yiheon picked up a piece of kimbap with the short chopsticks. He struggled to hold it between his long fingers without dropping it, making Heemin almost burst into laughter.He wanted to laugh out loud and tease him mercilessly, but he knew Yiheon might not take it well. So, maintaining his composure, he accepted the kimbap.“Eat.”“More?”“You said you were hungry.”Surprisingly, Yiheon seemed to enjoy it and fed him a piece of tteokbokki. Despite being a bit soggy, it was still chewy and the rich sauce tasted delicious, making Heemin feel a moment of joy.He regretted not eating it fresh, but the special location and the special person made it worth it.“You really eat that soggy stuff well.”“It’s still tasty.”“Here, eat.”Yiheon picked up another piece. He hadn’t realized it when he was feeding, but now, being fed felt a bit awkward. He told Yiheon he was fine and could eat by himself, but Yiheon ignored him and continued until the container was empty. His persistence showed even in moments like this.“I’m full.”He packed the empty containers and the now-red chopsticks back into the plastic bag and stretched.The spring breeze carried a faint scent of flowers, and the view of the lake was refreshing. It was a satisfying lunch, even if it was late.“Seo Heemin.”He was taking a deep breath of the fresh air he couldn’t get at home when Yiheon called his name in a low voice. It was a deep, soft, and even tender tone that reminded Heemin of the past.“Why?”“….”“Why call me and not say anything?”He turned his head and met the gaze of the man who was quietly staring at him. In his dark eyes, reflecting light, were remnants of scars that hadn’t healed.The look in his eyes, which seemed to stretch into infinity, made Heemin stop urging him and wait for him to find the right words. After a brief silence, Yiheon spoke again.“You’re really strange.”Heemin didn’t bother to ask what was strange. It would have been more odd if he hadn’t heard such words, as he was ‘Seo Heemin’ yet not ‘Seo Heemin.’ Yiheon continued, peering deeply into Heemin’s eyes as if searching for pebbles at the bottom of the lake.“People who owe debts, even if they pretend not to, it’s always noticeable. Their eyes, expressions, tone, and actions reveal underlying anxiety and fear.”“…”“You don’t have that. That’s why it’s strange. I want to open up your head and see what’s inside.”Cha Yiheon was a man with a strong drive, capable of carrying out his intentions whenever he wanted. His determination was evident in how he humbled himself, crawled like a dog, and reached his current position, finally grasping ‘Seo Heemin’ in his hands.It was Yiheon who had dragged Heemin to a psychiatrist the moment he sensed something was wrong. He might one day put Heemin on an operating table and open his head to check if it was dissociative identity disorder or some brain anomaly.However, Heemin didn’t find Yiheon’s words entirely frightening. If he were serious, he would have taken him to the hospital before starting this conversation. Yiheon, who had been silently listening, let out a short laugh when Heemin met his gaze.“Maybe because it’s not obvious, I keep falling for your shallow tricks, even knowing it’s deceitful. It’s troublesome.”“…Can’t I keep troubling you?”Heemin asked, watching the self-mocking light pass over Yiheon’s face. His thick-lined eyes narrowed for a moment. Heemin, meeting his probing gaze, spoke sincerely.“I won’t ask you to trust me right away. Actions speak louder than words, after all.”“What actions can a guy who backstabs me at every opportunity show?”Yiheon cut off Heemin’s words with a reproachful reply.“But in the end, I still came back to you, didn’t I?”“…”“Whatever I say or do, it’s all for you. So, please just let it go, like you are now. Don’t harshly scold me.”Heemin gave him a sidelong glance and smiled. It was a weapon that worked every single time, a hundred out of a hundred, or at least ninety-nine times. Yiheon had once shown that he couldn’t stand it, hence the ninety-nine times.Just as Heemin, smiling slyly, wondered if Yiheon would frown again, Yiheon suddenly reached out behind Heemin’s neck.“…What, what is this?”He wasn’t about to hit him, right? In such moments, the protagonists in novels did just one thing: kiss.Though it wasn’t his first time, Heemin’s body stiffened. The warmth of Yiheon’s hand brushed past his earlobe, heating his entire ear. His heart pounded as if it might burst.I shouldn’t have eaten the tteokbokki…He was more worried about the tteokbokki he’d just eaten than the fear of possibly fainting again. He tried to push Yiheon away, but his body was frozen like a statue.As Yiheon’s face drew nearer, Heemin closed his eyes tightly. There was no other way. He could only comply with Yiheon’s desire to kiss him.In a state of suspension, he waited for Yiheon’s lips to touch his. Instead, Yiheon’s fingers combed through his hair, and his breath brushed against Heemin’s cheek.“You had a petal in your hair.”Yiheon’s hand withdrew, and the distance between them, which had almost closed, widened instantly. Heemin opened his eyes, bewildered. He saw Yiheon calmly brushing off a cherry blossom petal from his hand.“…”Heemin’s nape flared with heat. He felt foolish for closing his eyes and puckering his lips as if he wanted the kiss. He was terribly embarrassed, feeling as if he had desired it. He was momentarily confused while adjusting to this world.Why couldn’t he avoid confusing people with a face like that of his friend?It was all his fault for making him mistake things from the beginning. Heemin, glaring at Yiheon who showed no particular reaction, responded brusquely.“You have a petal too.”A fallen cherry blossom petal, like a snowflake, had landed on Yiheon’s shoulder. He brushed it off with the palm of his hand as if dusting off a blanket. Noticing Yiheon’s slightly raised eyebrow, Heemin used the blowing flower breeze as an excuse to brush his shoulder a few more times. It was his little revenge.“Let’s go home now.”The lake, covered in petals, rippled with the sunlight’s shimmering reflections, and the warm weather made it a perfect spring day. Clouds drifted lazily overhead, marking a serene and peaceful spring day.Their first date ended without incident.***Ms. Ahn and Heemin had a tearful reunion.[I’ve been so worried about you.]Reading her heartfelt message on his phone, Heemin couldn’t help but throw his arms around Ms. Ahn and cry.“I’m sorry. I left without saying anything and even took money from the envelope. I’ll pay you back when I start earning money. Sob.”[You don’t have to repay me. Don’t cry.]“No, I’ll definitely pay it back.”She wasn’t a bad person. However, Heemin had held a bias against her for being associated with Cha Yiheon, thinking she would never be on his side. He hadn’t considered her perspective, focusing only on his own.Yiheon, standing behind him, clicked his tongue in disapproval, but Heemin resolutely hooked his pinky finger with Ms. Ahn’s, promising to make amends, never to do it again, and to repay the money he owed.“I’m not a runaway kid coming back home, geez.”Yiheon’s murmuring voice made Dr. Hwang, who had come to check on Heemin’s condition, burst into laughter. Ms. Ahn, who had been stiff with worry, finally relaxed her expression and smiled.“What’s so funny?” Yiheon asked.“Nothing, can’t a person laugh? Ahem,” Dr. Hwang replied.“Secretary Jung, take the doctor home,” Yiheon ordered.“Yes, sir.”Heemin had thought it was just a world in a book, a world that would disappear after he completed it. Nevertheless, he hoped this harmonious atmosphere would continue until the end.Yiheon, Secretary Jung, Ms. Ahn, and Dr. Hwang. And a runaway youth.The setup was a bit unusual, but it felt like he had gained a new family. Perhaps it was the family that ‘Seo Heemin’ had wished for.* * *“Stop reading and get dressed. We’re going out,” Yiheon said to Heemin, who was sitting with his back against the headboard, absorbed in a book. It was unusual for Yiheon, who always left for work early every morning, weekdays and weekends alike, to stay home. He must have some plans.“Am I coming too?”“Yes.”“Where are we going?”“Just get dressed and come out.”Heemin took the clothes Yiheon had tossed him and headed to the dressing room connected to the bathroom. Where could they be going that Yiheon would take him along?Considering the chaos at the inauguration ceremony, it definitely wasn’t the company. And they had already visited the hospital a few days ago, so it couldn’t be that either. He couldn’t figure it out. Heemin tilted his head in confusion as he slipped his arms into the shirt sleeves.Could it be…?