ALL NOVEL Chapter 18: Sinking Deeper
Although Xanthia's "constitution" attribute continued to improve, she found that her outward appearance remained deceiving.
Anyone who saw her for the first time would take her for a "delicate and introverted" soft girl, someone who seemed very easy to bully. They'd think a little teasing would make her cry, tears falling like pearls...
It couldn't be helped; her fragile aura seemed innate. When she did things that didn't fit her "soft girl" image, it created a huge contrast, making her even more charming.
Clearly, she didn't care about maintaining any particular image. Although she had accepted a task to become someone’s idealized first love, she, being a fun-seeker, soon forgot about it.
After all, there was no punishment for not completing tasks. As long as she was happy, that was enough. Living too purposefully would only reduce her happiness.
The task of becoming the White Moonlight would be much easier once she improved her "appearance" and "charisma" attributes. But for now, she only wanted to increase her "constitution" and "strength"!
Feeling her body get stronger every day brought her more joy than becoming a delicate, fragile vase ever could.
It's not that she didn't care about her "appearance" and "charisma" attributes. As a gamer, she understood priorities. Being pragmatic and results-driven, she focused on power first before indulging in aesthetic preferences.
During this period, Xanthia noticed that her new deskmate, Dematero, had a deep obsession with his ideal first love, Elena La Loannou. It wasn't something easily swayed.
Perhaps this was the value of one's first love?
Dematero, who loved literature, wrote hazy love poems for Elena every day. He would smile happily as he wrote, a classic lovestruck teenager, which was quite amusing.
This "foolish" Dematero had become one of Xanthia's sources of happiness. Maybe this was what youth was all about.
Despite using her "soft girl" tactics on him, Xanthia's charm wasn't yet refined enough to completely win Dematero over.
Given this, she decided to go with the flow and wished Dematero luck with his first love.
Seeing Dematero's lovesick state reminded Xanthia of her original self. In her memories, the original owner of her body never had feelings for any boy, always adhering to the belief that "the wise do not fall in love."
But if the original owner ever liked someone, how would her socially anxious and introverted self handle it?
She'd probably write a secret diary, pouring out emotions she couldn't express in reality.
She would likely hope that one day, the person she liked would accidentally read her diary. Unfortunately, by that time, it would be too late, as she would have already passed away...
Ah, the beauty of tragic, youthful love stories!
Inspired by Dematero, Xanthia found a new amusement: simulating the original owner's mindset and writing a diary filled with pain, conflict, and sadness. It could serve as a tear-jerker, like reading a tragic youth novel. If someone discovered it one day, it might even earn her some "pain points."
However, this amusement only lasted a few days. Once her interest waned and it no longer brought her happiness, she abandoned it halfway, like a writer who quits their novel.
After all, she wasn't the original owner. Maybe in another false timeline, this tragic diary would be completed, waiting for someone destined to read it.
Xanthia had to admire Dematero’s passion for literature. Since falling deeply in love with Elena, he became more poetic, spending all his free time writing, never seeming to tire.
She almost couldn't resist advising him, reminding him that grades were important too. Now, instead of using his free time to write, he even daydreamed in class, completely entranced.
But Xanthia ultimately didn't confront him. Instead, she shared his state with Glenn, who was closer to Dematero.
She didn't think she held much weight in Dematero's heart. Besides, she had to admit that when a teenager fell passionately in love, their world often revolved solely around that one girl, with all other girls fading into the background.
Glenn gave Xanthia a wry smile, "I've already advised him, but it's no use. Only when he comes to his senses can things change. The key lies with Elena. If she firmly rejects him, he'll snap out of it."
"Is Elena the kind of girl who would firmly reject someone?" Xanthia asked casually.
"Clearly not. As her deskmate, I know her well. She enjoys the attention of boys. As long as she doesn't dislike them, she responds 'kindly,' giving them more hope," Glenn concluded calmly.
Xanthia frowned. A girl like that could indeed make someone sink deeper, leaving boys heartbroken. If she wanted to collect "pain points," she could learn from Elena. But using such methods on a "nice and genuine guy" would be boring and bring no joy.
Seeing Xanthia frown, Glenn thought, "Dematero, you fool, the girl who truly cares about you is right in front of you, and you don't even see it!"
Because of Dematero, Glenn had gradually gotten to know Xanthia and found her very pleasant to be around. Sometimes, he didn't even see her as a girl but as a buddy, enjoying their time together, genuinely happy!
"Actually, there's another crucial issue," Glenn added. "Dematero is just too timid. He's afraid of being rejected. Plus, he likes writing and being all literary, so his imagination runs wild. He keeps moving himself to tears without ever explicitly expressing his feelings for Elena. She can't exactly reject him if he never confesses, right?"
Xanthia could only silently mock Dematero. His behavior was the epitome of a pretentious, self-pitying literary type. He was great at self-indulgence and self-sabotage...
She suddenly thought of the system’s "A Simulation of the Most Painful Rebirth Memory." If she used it on Dematero, it might be a case of "fighting fire with fire," with surprising results!
However, she wouldn't use it recklessly. Though it would grant her a huge amount of pain points from Dematero, could he withstand such pain?
She decided to wait and see. Let him enjoy his first love dream for now. When it shatters and he wakes up, then she would consider it.
