ALL NOVEL Chapter 20
“Everything. I’m sorry I couldn’t stop Seoho when he greeted you on the first day, and I’m also sorry for not paying attention to you even though you joined as our member. I avoided interacting with you because I didn’t know how to treat you.”
“It’s okay. You won’t avoid me now, right?”
“……Yeah. As the leader, I’ll take responsibility for you.”
“Why are you saying such grand things? I’ll take responsibility for myself. I won’t pass it onto you, hyung.”
“You’re quite sharp.”
Park Yoochan laughed heartily.
“If you’re having a hard time too, hyung, don’t shut yourself in like this. Talk to the members.”
“How can I talk? I’m the leader and the hyung. I have to handle things alone.”
What a pathetic thing to say. I narrowed my eyes and shook my head. Park Yoochan smiled faintly and asked, “Why?”
“Do you know why humans are called social animals?”
“What are you suddenly talking about?”
“It means we can’t do it alone. The proverb ‘strength in numbers’ didn’t come from nowhere. Just because you’re the leader doesn’t mean you have to isolate yourself. There are people around to help, so reach out your hand. It’s a waste if you don’t take the hands offered to you.”
Unlike me, you have many close friends, don’t you? If you ask the members for help, they’ll all help you, so why are you beating yourself up? I don’t understand why you’re choosing isolation.
Park Yoochan, who had been looking at me blankly, shook his head and remarked softly in amazement.
“You really are eighteen? You talk like someone who has lived an entire life.”
I was taken aback. I really had lived one life already and was on my second. The more this happens, the more confident I should be. How would he know I’m living my second life? I nonchalantly maintained my composure and calmly said:
“Want to see my ID?”
“Ahahah. Okay, okay. Thank you.”
Park Yoochan let out a delighted laugh I had never heard before. Just as I was about to leave the vocal room, he called out to me again.
“Oh, by the way, Haon.”
“Yes?”
“I heard you moved into the OO Apartment dorms?”
“Yes, there.”
“What unit?”
“1201.”
“……Then, is that where Jinsu lives?”
Who is Jinsu? It’s really hard for me to remember people’s names. I wish I could share the list of nicknames I made. I gave nicknames that would instantly bring their faces to mind when heard. Wouldn’t that be much easier to remember?
“I don’t know.”
“It seems like that’s the place though…… Alright, got it.”
“Okay. I’ll go ahead.”
“Ah, let’s go together! I need to practice too.”
“Then get up quickly.”
I reached my hand out towards Park Yoochan, who was sitting comfortably. He stared at my hand for a moment. Is he not going to take it? It’s not dirty.
Just as I was about to withdraw my hand in embarrassment, he belatedly grabbed it tightly. Park Yoochan laughed again.
It’s a miracle!
Park Yoochan’s fondness level changed to ‘Likes’. Not just neutral, but he actually likes me now. It skyrocketed from ‘Dislikes’ to ‘Likes’. No matter how much I think about it, I can’t figure out the reason.
All that happened was a misunderstanding being cleared up, there wasn’t really a particular catalyst or reason for him to start liking me. Maybe he’s just someone who starts liking others easily. That’s good though. Thanks to him, I’ve passed two members, leaving only two remaining.
The two who still dislike me.
Baek Kanghyun might be a bit of a bug. He said he was indifferent, so I don’t understand why the status is ‘Dislikes’.
After washing up, I came out of the bathroom. But Park Yoochan was waiting for me in the hallway. What is he doing here?
“What are you doing here?”
“I was waiting for you.”
“Why?”
“Here, take this.”
A smoothly arcing aluminum can flew towards me. Trash? I instinctively caught it – it was heavy. An unopened, fully sealed beverage can.
“Why are you giving this to me?”
“A small gesture of gratitude for comforting me. I feel sorry, but also thankful, and this is the only thing I can give you right now.”
He’s thanking me for comforting him? So this is a gift of thanks to me? I fiddled with the warm beverage can. It’s too precious to drink.
“Uh….. I’ll enjoy it.”
“Let’s go.”
Park Yoochan waited for me to walk alongside him before matching my pace. How long did he wait here for me to walk from the practice room?
I grumbled inwardly for no reason. I felt awkward, embarrassed, sheepish, yet also a strange sense of gratification and achievement.
I don’t know how to act now. The director and teachers were people who were favorably disposed towards me from the start. This is the first time my relationship has changed with someone who disliked me, so I’m flustered.
“Hyung.”
“Yeah?”
“I feel awkward.”
“But you were speaking so well earlier?”
“Was I?”
“Yeah.”
“I was, huh…..”
I’m dying of awkwardness. Isn’t this draining my stamina quickly? I checked discreetly, and while it had dropped a bit, the decrease wasn’t noticeable. I was certain that one of the criteria for stamina depletion was my psychological state, but now I’m confused.
“Actually, I feel a bit awkward too.”
“Of course, we weren’t on good terms before.”
“We can get along better from now on, if you don’t dislike me.”
Why would I dislike him? All he did was have a mental breakdown and lash out a bit.
“I don’t dislike you.”
“If I were you, I might have disliked me. Weren’t you resentful?”
“After hearing the explanation, I thought there was room for misunderstanding.”
Park Yoochan let out an empty laugh. The way he looked at me stirred some strange, indecipherable emotion within me. I couldn’t fathom the meaning behind that look at all. He seemed complicated, what kind of thought provoked him to gaze at me like that?
Park Yoochan’s eyes rolled to the side. And when they returned to me, they were neatly composed once more.
“Why didn’t you try to clear up the misunderstanding?”
“Would you have believed me if I spoke up? You thought about it alone first, sorted out your thoughts, and then asked me, right hyung? If I had tried to persuade you forcefully, the misunderstanding might have only deepened out of defiance.”
“I can’t argue with that.”
“Right? To be honest, I’m still dazed, it feels like I stumbled into success by chance.”
Park Yoochan laughed cheerfully as he ruffled my hair vigorously. It’s only been a few minutes since we made up, yet he’s already being so physically friendly!
“Isn’t it too soon to act so casually? You said you felt sorry towards me, hyung?”
“Do you want me to keep some distance? I’ll do as you wish if you’re uncomfortable.”
Park Yoochan withdrew his hand and moved slightly away. No, that’s not what I meant by keeping distance. Since Park Yoochan seems mentally fragile, it would be better for me to keep him close and monitor him. With that thought, I quickly reached out and pulled his arm back towards me.
“I can’t help it. Since you’re a sensitive person, hyung, I’ll look after you. Be at ease.”
“Yeah. Thank you.”
His smile returned. It was a pleasant feeling. To think I could be close with one of the members – it was something I never dared imagine or hope for. I’ll have to take good care of the mentally fragile Park Yoochan.
Come to think of it, what is this person’s talent? Should I use my Sneak a Peek skill when my stamina is high? It would be good to help him improve his strengths further.
As we walked side-by-side back to the practice room, Baek Kanghyun looked at us like a scholar making a groundbreaking discovery. He glanced at me, then at Park Yoochan, before muttering to himself:
“……He recovered quickly?”
“Doesn’t it usually take longer?”
“About a day or two.”
This was an unexpected bombshell. If his mentality collapsed during active promotions, causing him to be completely out of it for a day or two, what would happen to the schedules? It could ruin his condition for performances. And if he had to go on variety shows and laugh and joke around, how would he manage that?
“Kanghyun, how did you know?”
“I can see it. My eyes aren’t decorations, you know.”
“I thought no one would notice……”
Baek Kanghyun clicked his tongue loudly before speaking.
“Then you should have hidden it better.”
“It’s okay now. I’ll ask Haon to lend a hand.”
Park Yoochan pulled me to his side by the shoulder as he spoke. I stared up at him, perplexed. He’s bringing me into this at this timing?
“Right?”
He asked me, as if seeking my agreement. Even though he had mentioned the ‘lending a hand’ would be from the members, not me…… I agreed for now.
“Yeah, sure. Anytime you want.”
Baek Kanghyun’s face contorted grotesquely. Then he turned his back to us, with a small grumble that sounded like “How cringeworthy.” I agree, that’s not quite what I meant……
I would have accepted it even if a message like
I quietly took my place beside Baek Kanghyun. Since the song I had practiced earlier kept playing, I thought if I danced along, he might give me some coaching again. As I was diligently dancing to the beat, Baek Kanghyun called out to me.
“Jin Haon.”
Oh, great! I’ve been waiting for this.
“Yes!”
“In that part earlier, with the lyrics ‘you looking at me’, did you deliberately change the arm angle like that? You’ve been doing it that way since before.”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“It suits me better this way.”
Kanghyun stopped the music by manipulating his phone. When it resumed playing, it had skipped ahead one beat from where he had paused it.
Under the unspoken pressure to try it again, I moved my body. After a light turn, I bent my arms and lowered my shoulders, adjusting the angle of each arm differently. Originally, the move had both arms at the same angle.
Looking in the mirror, I saw Baek Kanghyun beside me, performing the same choreography more perfectly. One of the key points involved whipping the head around, which looked much cooler when done by someone skilled.
“How did you come up with things like this?”
He probably doesn’t actually need to ask how, seeing as he’s at the pinnacle of dancing himself, so I’m not sure what he’s asking. I’ll just explain the surface reasoning without the core meaning.