Here, Have a Cookie a Pokemon Fanfiction

“May, you’re being unreasonable,” I argued.

“We are not getting on that ship,” May said. She was typing on Sergei with purpose, and if the face he was making was any indication, a significant amount of force. “I can’t believe Wally. Honestly, this is a horrible joke to play on someone.”

He probably thought he was helping. I was kicking myself for not looking more closely at the tickets, now.

“Legends above this is so embarrassing.”

Embarrassing. Right. That’s the word she’s using for this. I sagged down a bit.

“I can’t afford a ferry ticket right now, May,” I said, hoping to pull a bit of heat off Wally.

“I can cover you,” May said resolutely. “We aren’t getting on that ship. We’re best friends, not... THAT!”

She can’t even say it. Why was I even entertaining the idea of telling her? Hell, why was she even acting like this? It’s a fucking cruise liner! Even if we weren’t a couple, we could still do fun cruise stuff!

“It was a practical joke, May. Come on! We can just ignore the couple’s stuff and have fun on a cruise!” I argued, doing my best to ignore the drastically shrinking chance that May would even entertain the idea of being more than friends.

“Lea, we’re TRENDING on Poketube.” May waved Sergei around a bit, glaring at the phone as she did it. “What exactly do you think is going to happen if we go on this boat?” May asked.

“We have a good time and enjoy some really good food?” I asked, hoping to appeal to the black hole that was her stomach.

“No, we’ll get mobbed by curious couples. Curious couples with CAMERA phones,” May said.

I winced, before sinking down a bit. I was honestly kind of glad May was mostly focusing on Sergei right now.

“We’ll probably get posted to Chatot or something, and we’ll get lab-” May suddenly stopped talking, her mouth hanging open as her grip tightened on Sergei.

Time stopped for a single moment before I watched my best friend reach up and clutch her skull in agony. She hunched down and clenched her eyes shut.

I rushed forward to support her, our argument briefly forgotten. May leaned into me as I propped her up. She was still clutching her skull.

“May! May, are you alright? May? May!” I asked. I noticed a bit of blood drip from her nose and froze.

“I... It felt like a migraine,” May whispered.

‘Emilie, can-’ I stopped as May started to double over in pain again. “Fuck, May-”

“It’s fine, it passed. I-” May stopped talking instantly as she turned to look my way. Her eyes, wide with fear, were drawn towards my shoulder.

Emilie was practically glowing with psychic energy, and the glare she was leveling toward May could melt steel.

“Emilie-” I shouted, before cutting myself off as May once again clutched her head in agony. My brain immediately realized something terrifying.

Emilie wasn’t trying to hurt May, she was focusing every ounce of energy she had to hold herself back FROM hurting May.

I carefully reached toward Emilie’s Poke Ball and pressed the return button. May briefly held her head again as Emilie was sucked back into the ball.

“I am SO sorry. I don’t know what came over her, she just-”

“Lea.”

I stopped talking.

“You call me a nerd all the time.” May started. “It’s fair. I know quite a bit about Pokémon. I had to pass my test with flying colors, after all.” She stared at me intently, and I gulped. “Would you like to know a quirk of the fairy type?”

“I-”

“They have an instinctual desire to protect the people and Pokémon closest to them. More than any other species. To the point that they will act in any way they can to remove that threat. It’s an obsessive compulsion that, sometimes, causes the Pokémon to react to things that aren’t a threat,” May explained, her eyes glazed over as she recited something back to me that she probably read in an encyclopedia somewhere.

“I-I don’t.” I struggled to find an explanation that would make this not blow up in my face. Some lie that could cover this, cause I sure as fuck wasn’t confessing ANYTHING after that little episode.

“Lea, what exactly was it that I said that hurt you enough that Emilie hit an instinct to remove a threat from her best friend.” May asked, both concerned and curious. “I feel the need to apologize, but I don’t know what for. Do you think I'm angry at you for something, or something specific I said or...” May trailed off, fuck. I needed to steer this conversation. NOW!

“It might have been something you were going to say?” I said, pointing to her head. “Emilie has a preview, remember.”

May looked down in confusion before a sudden moment of clarity passed over her features. Her face very quickly paled, and I wondered with a mounting sense of dread what that realization was.

“Honestly, considering what was about to come out of my mouth, I think the migraine was preferable,” May said with a wince.

“What-”

“Legends above, I was being an ass.” May trailed off again, making it a point to look anywhere but at me. “Lea, is there... maybe something you would like to share?” May asked.

“Not particularly.” I answered that question WAY too quickly.

May sighed, her lips pulling down. She opened her mouth, closed it, and then pulled me into a bone crushing hug.

“May-”

“I’m sorry.” she muttered.

I froze. What exactly was she apologizing for!?

“Some context would be really helpful right now, May,” I said, my voice strained due to the lack of air. “May... air...” May let go.

“Sorry.” May wiped at her face a bit. “I’m saying that a lot today, huh? It’s alright if you don’t want to talk to me about it, especially after... that,” May said. “But you CAN talk to me about anything.” May looked at me pleadingly.

“Okay, pretend I'm an idiot, it shouldn’t be that hard, what do you THINK you figured out. I’m honestly just lost, and I would really like a map,” I said.

May looked like a Stantler caught in headlights.

“Just spit it out al-”

“Are you gay?” May asked. The words died on my tongue. It took a second, and I definitely heard a dial up modem start to boot up at the back of my skull, but I realized something incredible.

May figured out the wrong thing. I was saved! I still didn’t know how to answer this question.

“I... maybe?” I answered. I didn’t have an answer to this question, honestly. I’ve never felt... anything for anyone besides May.

Said best friend decided this would be a perfect time to pull me into another hug.

“Would you stop? My ribs can only take so much abuse in one day!”

May backed off. “Sorry.”

“And stop apologizing, I actively don’t care about whatever it is that you think you’ve done, so quit acting weird.” I glared at my best friend. “Look, it’s not really something that MATTERS right now. I just... know that guys don’t... click.” That was at least true. Granted, most girls didn’t click either. “Nothing needs to change.” I think I was saying that to both of us.

“But...” May started, before shutting her mouth and rapidly nodding. “Right. Nothing has to change.” I breathed a sigh of relief, before staring at Sergei in May’s hands, specifically the time. The cruise would be leaving soon.

“Now, am I going to be getting on the ship by myself, or are you coming with me?” I asked.

May’s eyes widened.

“Lea, I-” Alright, fuck this. This whole conversation was stupid.

“Am I repulsive?” I asked.

“What- NO! Lea-”

“Are you embarrassed to be seen with me?”

“Of course not, Lea, you’re my best friend. I’d-”

“Are we dating?” I asked, probably skirting the line a bit on what I could get away with asking.

“No, but-”

“Then why the fuck do you care?” I asked, ignoring the bit of heartache I felt from her answer.

“I-I can’t-”

“Why?” I asked. “I can count on one hand the number of people whose opinions I give a fuck about, and none of them are on that boat.”

“It’s different for me, okay!?” May exploded at me.

“It’s really not!” I shouted back. “All the people you’re worried about don’t matter, May. Are you really going to tell me that you’re going to let some random asshat on the internet get between you and my sister’s cooking, on a luxury line cruise ship, with a bunch of random couples that we can make fun of?”

May didn’t answer right away.

“Where the hell is the bad ass that told Roxanne off in the middle of her first match? Who punched Birch’s kid in the face for being an ass hat? Where the hell is my best friend?” I asked.

“I don’t know, okay?” May shouted before looking away. “It’s been... liberating. Not worrying about being Dad’s kid. Not being recognized by every-”

“Then tell the rest of the world to fuck off and have fun, alright?” I said, interrupting her musings. “They don’t matter.”

“They don’t matter...” May repeated. A foghorn blared and May grabbed my hand and jerked me forward. I almost fell forward onto her. “Come on. Stop dragging and hurry, or we’re going to miss the boat.” What?

“What?”

“Congratulations, you won the argument, that means you get to be the girl in this fake relationship, so shut up and run, because I am NOT the kind of person to put up with that ‘I don’t want to now’ crap,” May said as she started to pick up the pace down the pier. "Just make sure the fake break up at the end of this trip is convincing, alright? And we’re talking about your big reveal later, missy, so you better be ready for that!” May shouted as she raised her hands over her head to flag down the dock master.

“May, are you-”

“Sorry, we kind of got side tracked. Here’s our tickets, we’ll just hop on board really quick.” May cut me off.

“Well, hurry on then, lass. They’ll be casting off soon.” He took our tickets and rushed us onto the ship. May grabbed my hand and dragged me aboard.

“What happened to-”

“I already said you were right,” May interrupted me. Again. This was payback for earlier, wasn’t it? “I can think of worse ways to travel, and I think I said this at the start of our journey, but I can’t think of anyone else I would want to travel with.”

“Aww...”

May nearly catapulted away from me as a new, simpering voice hit my ears.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I just got a message to escort a last-minute arrival to orientation.” She was tall, blonde, skinny, and looked entirely too perky.

I did not like this woman.

“Follow me, please.” She turned away from us and started walking towards the front of the deck.

I walked forward a bit and frowned. May wasn’t walking next to me. I turned to see her frozen in place as she stared at the group of people towards the front of the ship.

“May, it-” Stop.

Emilie’s voice rang in my head, calling me a dense moron. Legends above, she was in her ball and phantoms of her voice echoed in my skull. I extended my hand out, and gave her the most comforting, reassuring smile I could manage. May leaned back from the offering in shock.

“I’ll walk with you, okay?” I spoke softly. May hesitantly grabbed my hand, before nodding.

We walked to orientation hand in hand, and I probably had the world's goofiest smile on my face the whole way through.

“There’s only one bed.” I observed as I entered our room.

“What exactly were you expecting, this is a couple’s cruise,” May pointed out. “Considering how a lot of the people at orientation were looking at each other-”

“I’m going to stop you right there,” I said.

Jokes meant she was doing better, right? It felt like she relaxed a bit after orientation, so I’m calling that a win. I walked over and bounced a couple times on the mattress before shooting my best friend a smile.

“I suppose I can sleep on the floor-”

“We can share the bed, we’ve done it before,” May said, flecks of red dusting her face. “This’ll just be like the sleepovers we used to have.”

“That was before-”

“Nothing. Has. To. Change,” May said every word slowly and deliberately.

I stared at her for a moment before pulling her into a hug.

“Thanks,” I said, giving her an ear to ear grin.

May nodded.

“Just so we’re clear, cuddling’s fine, clothes stay on, and hands stay above them, and if you wake up curled around me like a spider monkey again, don’t push me off the bed and lock yourself in the bathroom for twenty minutes,” I joked.

May glared at me before looking away. “I’m still sorry about that.” May muttered.

“May, you legit can’t control what you do while you sleep. In fact, I don’t think I can remember a time when you weren’t cuddling something while you slept.” My mind flashed back to a few of those sleepovers where I made fun of her for all her stuffed animals. “Unless you’re apologizing for shoving me off the bed and hogging the bathroom for twenty minutes after the fact. In which case, I accept your apology,” I said.

“It was NOT twenty minutes,” May countered.

“Felt like it. You’re lucky I like you so much. I was this close to not chasing after you. My legs were clenched together for the entirety of that conversation,” I said.

“You did not.” May denied before throwing her bag into the closet and crashing beside me on the bed.

I kept waiting for a mental retort that never came. I pulled out a solid white Poke Ball and stared at it with no small amount of trepidation.

“Do you think she’s calmed down?” I asked May.

She nervously looked at the ball. “Pokémon are aware of what happens outside of their ball if they care to look,” May said hesitantly. “She’s probably doing better, if for no other reason than she hasn’t let herself out and pureed my brain. Do you want to let her out and see?”

“I just... it feels weird, her not being out with me. I got used to it. I kept veering to the left when I followed our guide because I was correcting for a weight that wasn’t there.” I chuckled. “Never thought I’d miss her voice in my head,” I said dryly.

“Do you want me to leave the room?”

I nodded my head yes. “I don’t want to chase you out of our room, but that would probably be better.” To say nothing of the fact that you leaving would give me a chance to unpack everything else my brain is thinking about right now. “Safer, at least. I don’t want Emilie to hurt you, and I'm pretty sure Emilie doesn’t want to hurt you either. Do you mind just... exploring the ship without me for a bit? I’ll find you when we get done.”

“Sure thing.” May smiled reassuringly. “This’ll give me a chance to figure out what we can do on this cruise besides be lazy and eat amazing food.” May opened the door and walked out.

I heaved a sigh, not looking forward to this. I tossed out Emilie’s ball, and sighed in relief that she looked, mostly, normal.

‘I am so sorry!’ Mostly. As soon as she formed, she pressed her forehead to the ground in a bow. ‘I am the lowest of pond scum not fit to be on your roster.’

“Nice, you’re now pulling from my memories for anime references. I really have corrupted you if you’re pulling from Whismur the Rock of all things.” I sighed as I counted to ten in my head. “You aren’t pond scum. You’re part fairy. May already explained. Granted, we need to learn how to control that, so this doesn’t happen again, but I’m not mad.” I reassured. “Props by the way, you did something that scared me even with the mental block.”

Emilie still hadn’t gotten up from her bow.

“Dammit, would you get up? This is making me uncomfortable,” I said.

‘Sorry.’ Emilie scrambled to stand up, though she was still avoiding eye contact with everything that wasn’t the ground. She also didn’t say anything else.

“Look, I don’t blame you for what happen-”

‘I know you don’t!’ Emilie interrupted. ‘It was like the first thing I picked out of your brain. I blame me though. I pride myself on having impeccable control. Mom always stressed the importance of that tenant. That it was more important for us than for any other psychic! To lose myself like that...’ Emilie started shaking. ‘I could’ve reduced May’s brain to a vegetable fruit smoothie.’

“But you didn’t,” I corrected. “You held yourself back. Hell, looking at how your mom reacted to me, you might be better than her! You just gave May a mild headache.”

‘You want to know what’s bad? I’m still fuming. The thoughts that were bouncing around inside her skull made me want to put my fist through a wall, and the way she was making you feel during her melt down was completely unacceptable!’ The last bit was said in a hiss.

“Emilie, you’re slipping again,” I said.

Emilie stopped.

‘Thanks,’ Emilie said. ‘I’ll work through this. I’m sorry, it’s just... really easy to be angry at May right now.’

I sighed, before looking away. “To be fair, she did get off a few comments that... really sucked to listen to.” My mouth pulled down into a frown as I joined Emilie in observing the beautiful designs on our floor rug. “I know she’s not in the best headspace right now, but... is it bad that I want to be mad at May, too?” I asked, suddenly feeling very small.

“NO!” Emilie shouted.

Everything else stopped for a moment as I stared down at Emilie in abject shock.

‘She fucking ripped your heart out of your chest and stomped on it for good measure, and she doesn’t even know she did it! She was mean, and rude, and-’

“Emilie,” I interrupted.

‘What?’ she snarled, before thinking about what she said. ‘Shit, I'm doing it again. Dammit.’

“Not that,” I whispered, unsure if I actually heard what I heard. “You spoke.”

Emilie tilted her head. ‘Huh? What do you mean? We’ve been speaking for the last fifteen minutes.’

“No, I mean you opened your mouth, and said something. In normal human tongue!” I said.

Emilie looked at me like I had grown a second head.

“Do me a favor really quick. Open your mouth and say ‘No’,” I said.

‘This is stupid, but...’ “No.” Emilie’s eyes widened.

I grinned.

“Well, I know it’s not healthy to shelf all the emotional turmoil we’re both going through right now, but I don’t think we’re going to make any progress on that without May, and this is way too interesting for me to think about anything else. Now that I know it’s possible, we’re going to expand that vocabulary,” I said, hopping in place as I stared down at my starter.

Emilie looked more and more uncomfortable the more excited I got.

“Let’s start with an easy one. Yes.”

‘Yes what?’ Emilie asked.

“Say yes, you moron,” I said.

Emilie sighed. “Ru- Ra-”

I shook my head. “No no, feel.” I leaned down and motioned for her to touch my throat. “I don’t know what you did when you said your first word, but we’re going to approach this scientifically now. Reach out and feel my vocal cords and mimic my lips when I say it.” I said as Emilie leaned forward and put her hand against my throat. “Yes.”

‘Uh... again. Slower,’ Emilie said.

“Yyyyeeeessss,” I demonstrated.

“Rooo- Rrreessss- Yyeeessss-”

“Perfect! Now, rip the band aid off.”

“Yes,” Emilie said, and I couldn’t help but grin like I had gotten my first birthday present all over again.

“Great work. Now then, let’s move on to the most important words. The Questions. Why.”

“Lea, you’re not going to believe...” May trailed off as she looked at the scene in front of her. Emilie had her hand around my throat as I spoke what probably sounded like a very random assortment of words. “Emilie, I know Lea probably deserves this for something, I don’t know what yet, but the possibility definitely exists. Homicide is never the answer.” Emilie turned a glare toward May. “I'm sorry. I’ll shut up now. Please ignore me.” May said in a fervent tone as she backed away from Emilie slowly. My starter looked away, and I felt shame leech into our bond. I needed to fix that right the fuck now.

“May, I’m fine. More than fine, in fact. You’re not going to believe this, but Emilie, I think you have something you were wanting to tell May?” I asked. May quickly moved to pull out Sergei, but I raised my hand. “You won’t need that.”

“Huh, but how-”

“Sorry,” Emilie said.

May went quiet and stared at Emilie in wonder. “I- Holy shit.”

“So, the first word was a fluke. She felt so strongly about something I had said that she just... blurted it out loud,” I explained.

“No,” Emilie said with a smile.

“Makes sense that her first actual word was said to disagree with me. We’ve kind of been pushing this ever since,” I explained giddily.

“What all can she say?” May asked, her eyes lit up as she slowly got closer.

I motioned for Emilie to demonstrate.

“Yes. No. Why. Where. When. How. Who. What. Meet. Emilie. Lea. Hi. Bye. Wait.” Emilie looked away. “May. Sorry.” May’s eyebrows went higher the more words Emilie said.

“Damn, you’ve been busy,” May commented. “Speaking of May being sorry. I need to apologize to you as well.”

“Why?” Emilie asked.

I resisted the urge to laugh.

“I didn’t mean too, but... I was being a bitch. To Lea, and honestly, to Wally too. Even if he wasn’t there for it. After touring the boat, I know for a fact he paid more for these tickets than he said he did,” May said, glaring at the room.

Ah ha, something else that I can yell at him about.

“Lea’s got thick skin, but she gets hurt too, sometimes, and honestly, you stopped me from being an even bigger ass than I could recover from.” May looked away.

What on earth was she going to say?

“Lea-

“I know you,” May interrupted Emilie. “I know you feel terrible about what happened, even though, all things considered, you did a very good job of curbing your instincts. I’m sorry you had to deal with that.” A tenseness left Emilie’s shoulders, and she relaxed for the first time since coming back out of her Poke Ball.

‘Tell her thanks,’ Emilie whispered.

“She says thanks. Though now that I'm thinking about it, that should probably be the next word!” I shouted gleefully.

Emilie groaned. “Why?” Emilie asked.

“Well, wouldn’t it be nice if you could tell people thanks on your own? Plus, it’s good to expand your word pool,” I said.

“Why?” Emilie asked. Again.

“Because a talking Pokémon sounds really cool and being able to have a regular conversation with you and May without having to play telephone sounds awesome,” I said.

“Why?” Emilie asked. Again. A small smile adorned her lips.

“Well, it’ll make it even easier to talk to new people, and May will appreciate it,” I said.

“Why?” Emilie asked.

“Alright, look here, ya little shit,” I growled.

Both May and Emilie started laughing.

‘Know that we love you despite your low Int stat,’ Emilie consoled.

‘I take solace in the fact that an extended amount of time in my mind is slowly turning you into a massive dork. No, I don’t care what that says about me, I'm already too far gone.’ I spitefully responded.

Emilie stuck her tongue out at me.

“So, what’d you find? Anything fun to do on this ship?”

May grinned. “Well, going down the list, there’s a ballroom dance class on offer...” May paused for some reason. She looked at me expectantly.

‘She’s waiting for you to mock the option, preferably with a joke about old people,’ Emilie said. ‘I wouldn’t mind checking it out, though.’

“Is it open to just people, or can Pokémon join?” I asked.

May stared at me in shock. “You’re actually considering a ballroom dance class? You?” May asked.

“Well, not really, it might be fun, but mostly Emilie wants to check it out, and I think Joern would be happy dancing to any kind of music,” I explained. “We could maybe ask if our Pokémon could join, and if it looks interesting, we could maybe take a class.” Granted, the thought of dancing with May gave the idea a bit more traction as something that I might want to do, but I obviously couldn’t SAY that.

“Right... moving on, they have a couple’s trivia after dinner with the grand prize being a high-end bottle of wine,” May offered.

“...how high-end?” I asked.

“Seriously!” May’s eyes widened.

“May, we’ve known each other for years. I think the only other person who knows me better is Emilie, and she doesn’t have a choice.” I replied.

“Yes,” Emilie said before shivering.

“All I'm saying is, it might be nice to score some easy money while we’re here,” I offered. “Or we could just have a fun night and down the damn thing.”

“I apparently don’t know you as well as I thought, cause I one hundred percent thought you were going to mock all of these.” May shrugged. “They don’t really feel like your jam.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked.

“Lea, you tried to bring a baseball bat on our journey, both because you wanted a weapon, and to have something from your favorite sports team.” May explained it as though I were a small child.

“I fail to see the correlation here,” I deadpanned.

“Of course,” May responded back in the same tone of voice. “Anyway, this next one was the one I thought would get you excited. They have a couples’ doubles tournament, starting on the last day of the cruise. First place is three heart scales and a set of hyper potions. Open entry.” May grinned.

“Sounds like a blast.” I smiled. “No way in hell we’re winning, though.”

“Oh, COME ON!” May complained. “Are you just doing this to screw with me?”

“I’m still excited,” I said laughing. “I’m looking forward to it, honest. It’ll be fun battling with you, but we’ve never fought together before, and I’d be willing to bet the rich people on this cruise have bought every advantage their Pokémon could ever possibly need.”

“Yeah, but rich people are almost always horrible battlers themselves,” May countered.

“Steven Stone, Diantha, Lance-”

“Those don’t count!” May snarled.

“Yes, dear,” I said cheekily.

May fumed at me before sighing. “You’re probably right. We’re still doing it, right?” May asked nervously.

“Of course. I might also be wrong, and the field is nothing but trust fund kids.” I grinned. “Won’t know till we try. Anyway, there was one item you mentioned that I am very eager to experience. You mentioned Dinner?” I asked, and my stomach chose that moment to let out a rather mighty growl.

I leaned back in my chair and gazed out into the dining room. I faced a difficult choice. This was the best food I had ever eaten. The texture of the fish melted on my tongue, the mashed potatoes were fluffy, buttery perfection, the veggies were steamed and seasoned into tiny pieces of happiness, and the steak was a center cut masterpiece...

I wanted more.

My stomach did not.

“Hurts so good,” I complained. I turned to stare at the stack of plates May had left in her wake. “I swear to every legendary in existence, your stomach doesn’t exist. Your esophagus just leads down into a black hole from which there is no escape.”

May leaned back from what had to be her sixth plate of food.

“This black hole is calling it quits.” May belched. “I think I overdid it a bit. I’m not sure if I have room left for dessert.”

My eyes widened. “How the fuck are you still so skinny. I don’t understand. You munch on my baked goods all day long. You eat more than me and Wally combined at the center. You do no exercise outside of our basic traveling. Just... how?”

May just smirked. “Maple family is just built differently, I guess. You should see Dad at big meals.” May laughed.

“Probably shouldn’t say that when your stomach looks like a bowling ball,” I argued.

May laughed. “Fine, come on, I think the stupid trivia thing starts soon.”

“But that means I have to get up.” I grunted as I hefted myself up, careful not to bend too much.

“Help me up, would you?” May begged, doing her best to look helpless.

I held out two hands and pulled her up, before turning around running face first into a seven-foot-tall monolith of a human being. Dark skin and long dark hair contrasted with a white suit. He turned around and instinctively looked down as I craned my neck to meet his gaze.

“Sorry about that. I wasn’t looking where I was going,” I muttered.

“Nah, I’m kind of used to it, I take up too much space.”

His voice did not match his build. At all. I expected a deep baritone, what I got was a relaxed Alto. I felt a bit of tension leave May as she relaxed into my side, and I suddenly realized she was leaning against me to support her weight. Heat rushed to my cheeks.

“Wait, hol up. Hey, Jasmine!” The man shouted, and a short, pale woman in a red dress came over with a pair of drinks. Dark red hair hovered just above her shoulders, and striking green eyes met mine as she passed her glass to Wayne.

“I think I found some interesting people,” he said.

The tension that had left earlier came back with a vengeance as May suddenly froze.

“Interesting is a bit of an understatement.” There was an accent there that I couldn’t quite place. It was incredibly faint, whatever it was. “I’m surprised to see Poketube’s newest superstars on this ship,” she said.

“I don’t think that superstar is the word I would use...” May said.

Jasmine brushed her off.

“Honey, your friends battle got like... five thousand views. On her first day. Your post today got like double that in half the time.”

Wait, what? Really? Dammit all!

“Like, yeah, most of that is you being... you.”

I didn’t like this woman. At all.

“But the videos were fantastically shot and were an incredibly fun watch. Both of you got a ten out of ten from this reviewer.”

Never mind. She’s great. Please praise me more.

‘Down girl,’ Emilie said.

“Well, it will be once we actually get around to making the video.” Jasmine shot the man a look.

I didn’t know it was possible for a man that big to whine.

“Babe, come on, we’re on vacation!” he complained.

“Wayne, this is a perfect opportunity!” Jasmine said, looking annoyed.

‘They’re a pair of content creator’s on Poketube. They mostly review battle videos and league matches,’ Emilie explained in my head. ‘The girl wants to interview the two of you. I think she’s a bit more serious about the channel than the guy.’

I shifted slightly to look at May and winced as she kept looking between the two people in front of us like they were going to eat her.

“Alright, so you obviously know who WE are, and we now know who you are. We really should be going, though, we were...” Making our way over to a contest that looks like it’s started already. I sighed as the last few people in line on the opposite side of the dining room went through the double doors and they closed.

“Never mind,” I muttered.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hold you up, and I apologize for Jasmine.,” Wayne said before moving over to the table. “Don’t suppose you’d be willing to hang out for a bit though, would you?” He pulled a pair of chairs out for us. “Please, it would probably make my girl’s night, and honestly, mine too. I was a big fan of your battle. That water golem thing was sick.”

I preened a bit at the praise, and I heard May groan.

‘I like this one.’ Emilie said.

‘Of course you do.’ I said back, before looking at May. “Up to you, May. I’m good with whatever.”

May looked between me, the chair, and the hallway, before sighing and grabbing the closest chair.

“Mostly because I don’t feel like walking all the way back to our room, yet. Also, can we NOT talk about the stupid videos.” May grouched out.

I chuckled as I took my spot next to her.

Jasmine gave May an odd look. “If you don’t like them, why did you post them?” she asked.

“May, please let me tell the story.” I begged.

May put her head in her hands as she leaned up against the table, before nodding.

“Alright, so May’s phone is possessed,” I explained, and chuckled as Wayne suddenly shifted his chair a solid three feet away from May.

“LEA!” May shouted. “I have a Rotom phone. It’s a new thing that Devon is working on. After the last two days, I’m not sure if they should go to mass production.”

“May, stop it. You’ll hurt Sergei’s feelings,” I said.

Sergei levitated out of May’s bag and floated over to me, a frowny face emoji on his screen.

“See! Look what you did!” I shouted.

May groaned.

“I’m sorry, Sergei. That was uncalled for,” May said.

The phone nodded once, before landing on my side of the table.

“Right, well continuing on, Sergei recorded our gym battles, and on a whim, decided to make up some... mock videos. May, being the directionally challenged and tech illiterate idiot that she is-”

“You can’t just come to Sergei’s defense and then attack me like this,” May cut in with a glare.

“She uploaded my video.” I finished with a smirk. “And I stand by my statement. The trip from Rustboro to Petalburg woods is pathed out. Not only did you not need to pull up the map, but if you had just asked, Sergei would have come out and navigated for us, no handling required.”

May leaned back as I finished in shock, like she hadn’t even thought of that. The realization was followed by a thud as May slammed her head into the table.

“It’s all my fault. All of it. I hate everything,” May muttered into the table.

I patted her hair consolingly.

“Wait, so that’s the first video explained, how did the second one get uploaded?” Wayne asked.

“We were fighting over the phone, and I had May’s video pulled up. I was curious what it looked like.” I grinned sheepishly. “One of us uploaded it in the chaos, I don’t know who.”

“So, a lover’s spat gave us one of the funniest gym battles I have ever seen?” Jasmine asked.

Both May and I froze.

“Was it something I said?”

“Sorry, we’re... not used to people calling it that.” May explained.

I whipped my head around and gave her an odd look, wondering why she was going along with it.

‘She thinks it’s easier to just go with it while we’re on the boat. She was serious about that break up moment at the end of our trip, by the way,’ Emilie said.

I winced. ‘I am NOT doing that. Hell no. I... I don’t think I could, and I really don’t want to think about how she would break up with me.’ The thoughts my brain were coming up with for both scenarios tied my stomach up in knots. ‘Can I just hide out in my room at the center while we’re in Dewford? I don’t want to deal with any of that.’

‘We’ll figure something out,’ Emilie said.

‘How the hell are you still on this ship? Wake up, the ship is dead, May shot it with three torpedoes and sent it to the locker,’ I complained.

‘Alright, I got really confused at first. I thought you were talking about the actual ship.’ Emilie giggled. ‘I choose to keep faith. By the way, they’re talking to you.’ I turned away from Emilie to see an angry May, and two awe inspired looks.

“That is so cool,” Wayne whispered.

“No, it’s so annoying!” May complained. “What’s worse is Lea can include me in the conversation and CHOOSES not to.”

I winced. “It’s not-”

“I looked it up, and you’re full of shit.” May glowered. “What do you and Emilie say about me in your private conversations, huh?”

“She mostly calls me an idiot, and questions why you put up with me,” I replied honestly.

Wayne barked out a single laugh. Jasmine giggled a bit before getting interrupted by a single soft chyme. She pulled out her phone.

‘I am not that bad,’ Emilie complained.

“But yeah, it loses its novelty really fucking fast. Every time, we’ll just be talking and then she’ll just stop, for like five minutes.”

I glared back. “It is NOT five minutes. I have never been in my head for that long, and almost everything that Emilie’s good with sharing gets sent to Sergei.” I complained. “You just like to exaggerate so you can complain more.”

May looked scandalized. “Excuse me-”

“Girls, calm down. We’re here to have a fun time, back off with the claws,” Wayne said, looking between us nervously.

‘If only he knew that this is how you two flirt,’ Emilie said.

I felt my face heat up as I glared at my starter.

‘Lot of lip for a junkie,’ I said.

‘I’ll be good,’ Emilie said quickly.

I probably shouldn’t be encouraging that line of thought, should I?

“Fine, I’ll let Lea off the hook for ignoring me. Again,” May said.

I gave her my award winning smile. Emilie gave me a look.

‘Seriously, Eve gave me an award for it, it’s in the office for exemplary customer service,’ I said.

‘You were nine,’ Emilie deadpanned.

I pouted.

“Great, now then, I don’t think we ever formally introduced ourselves. My name’s Wayne, this is Jasmine, and we run a small reviewing channel on Poketube.”

Aha. I found the sales pitch.

‘Actually, he is just introducing himself,’ Emilie commented.

“Kind of figured that out already,” May said with a scowl. “No, I will not be taking interviews, thank you.”

“Yeah, I figured that out already.” Wayne threw May’s words back at her with a smile. “You seem like the type that really doesn’t like attention. It’s fine. Like I said, we’re on vacation,” Wayne explained.

Jasmine sagged down in her chair and just typed away on her phone with a pout as May relaxed in her seat.

I frowned and looked down at the table.

It was weird. I had spent so long expecting a sales pitch, and now that it wasn’t coming, I felt disappointed. I...

I think I wanted to be interviewed. I barely knew these people at all, but they wanted to know me. May might have hated that, but for so long, I was a piece of the background. Having people notice me...

It felt nice! I sighed, and suddenly, Jasmine was staring at me rather intently.

She wasn’t the only one. May tossed me a sideways glance, and I suddenly felt incredibly uncomfortable.

‘Just ask, you dipshit. You said it yourself, we’re here to have a good time,’ Emilie said with a grin.

“I... wouldn’t say no,” I whispered out, still incredibly nervous about how May would react.

Jasmine smiled, and Wayne groaned.

“Of course you wouldn’t, ugh... fine,” Wayne said.

Jasmine fist pumped before pulling her phone back out. I looked nervously at May. She sighed, before adopting a slightly apologetic tone.

“Just keep me out of it, okay?” May asked. She groaned at my look. “I was speaking for both of us, and I’m sorry if you felt like you couldn’t say anything.” She looked away. “My issues aren’t yours. If you want to, have fun.”

“Thank you,” I said earnestly.

“That said, please wait till we get to Dewford. We uh... aren’t out to family yet.”

I had to resist the urge to laugh at how awkward she sounded when she said that. Legends above that’s adorable.

Jasmine froze.

“That won’t be an issue, will it?” May asked.

“Nah, I think we can enjoy all the comforts the ship has to offer while we’re on it and save the work stuff for later. This’ll give us a chance to get to know each other more, right Jazz?” Wayne asked.

Jasmine looked away. “Alright, so... uh. You’re going to laugh,” Jasmine started.

“Why do I feel like I'm not going to laugh?” I asked with a glare.

Jasmine shrunk a bit, and May leaned in.

“What did you do?” she asked.

“Okay, so. I promised my Chatot account that I'd keep them updated about anything cool that happened on our cruise,” Jasmine said.

May tensed next to me.

“I... might have posted a picture of you two. With the caption of guess who we met on our couple’s getaway. I might’ve also added a couple of rainbow hearts.” Jasmine looked away as she finished talking.

“So... just delete it,” I suggested. All three of them gave me pitying looks.

“It’s already been shared. And downloaded. And reposted. A lot.” Jasmine kept digging.

I honestly wondered if Samie should be out here for this. He might learn something.

“I just assumed you were out. You’re two newly famous people on a couple’s cruise!”

May just leaned back in her chair looking lost.

I glared at Jasmine. “Suddenly not liking the idea of an interview, sorry.” I said brusquely.

Jasmine nodded, before standing up.

“I understand.” He glared at his partner before standing up. “I’m really sorry about this. I hope you kick Brawly’s ass twice as hard as you did Roxanne’s.”

I watched both leave before chancing a look at May. She looked more freaked out than when we got on the ship.

“You okay?” I asked worriedly.

“I... I just wasn’t expecting that,” May said. “I kind of got a bit more comfortable at orientation. Everyone was just stuck on each other. I let myself think that I was blowing things out of proportion, earlier.” She stopped and swallowed.

I still didn’t understand why this was such a big deal to her.

“I think my brain is stuck at my video’s supposed view count. It keeps thinking that that’s the number of people that now think we’re in a romantic relationship,” May said.

“We’re having a big break up at the end of the cruise, remember?” I asked.

May slowly shook her head.

“Besides, the number of people that think that are people that follow Jasmine’s Chatot feed. That’s probably a significantly lower number.” I consoled. “We’re fine.” I looked toward Sergei. “At least, I think we’re fine. Sergei?”

A message immediately popped up with a link to Jasmine’s profile. Her post was... popular, but her numbers weren’t anywhere near as damning... and now it’s gone.

‘She deleted the post. A lot of people probably still have access to the image, and they’ll probably repost it, but it’ll help,’ Sergei responded.

I kind of felt bad. She didn’t mean any harm, I don’t think.

‘She was just excited to share with her fans.’ Emilie explained.

May sighed.

“It’s not the end of the world.” May commented. “People probably already mistake us for a couple, if Wally’s gift is anything to go by.”

I wanted to scream that it was probably my fault, but I held myself back.

“Lea, do you mind if we just turn in early? It’s been a long day.”

I nodded, before trying to help her up again. May stopped me, got up herself, and made it a point to keep her distance from me on our walk back to our room.

The four feet felt like a fucking chasm between us.