chapter 8
8. Still looking at the answers, little brother?
The minor incident didn’t affect the enthusiasm of the job seekers at all, these naive souls hadn’t sensed the trickery in today’s audition.
What the script proved doesn’t need to be said, but just the sight of this chubby boy ending the wait and immediately starting the “audition” upon Long·Tao’er’s arrival, one could tell there was some unspeakable backdoor deal going on!
Helpless, with the audition already underway, I had no choice but to stay put, steeling myself.
“This is the only official priest qualification certificate issued by headquarters to the local church recently! With it, one can train as an official priest and enjoy the powers bestowed by the goddess!”
I silently added in my mind that it would also allow me to cling to Ke Fei’er’s coattails.
Out of respect for the occasion, the chubby priest, who seemed eager to hand the certificate directly to Long·Tao’er, finally pursed his lips and put it away.
The next part of the audition will be a selection for your ‘talent’; those without talent do not deserve to become a glorious priest! Next, I will ask you some questions about events that have not occurred, but have already been predicted by other priests. Then, you will answer on the spot based on your intuition. Those who can answer frequently and without error will prove they have the qualifications to become a priest!
This is clearly a contest of who can talk more like a charlatan, but because of this, the interview method is also very unreliable. If it weren’t necessary to “go through the motions,” I’m afraid the chubby interviewer would have directly handed the qualification certificate to Longtao’er—the local lord’s son.
And what happened next was exactly as I had imagined.
“First question: What will our town’s harvest be like next year!?”
As soon as the words were spoken, before the other interviewees, who were clueless about the answer to such a question, even had time to think, Longtao’er had already proudly announced his “prophecy,” presumably an answer he had obtained in advance.
“The harvest next year will be the same as this year!”
“Truly worthy of Lord Longtao’er, with such skill and speed, it’s clear you have the potential to be a priest, even a high-ranking one.”
A flurry of flattery made Longtao’er very comfortable, and he looked around at the other interviewees with a smug smile, as if mocking their overestimation of themselves.
A few other interviewees realized the trickery at play, but they couldn’t do anything about it. They could only curse under their breath and leave dejectedly. Seeing this, Longtao’er was so pleased that he didn’t even bother to pretend anymore.
“Next question: The weather for the next few days…”
“Sunny.”
“Truly worthy of Lord Longtao’er, your talent for prophecy is so strong that you’re answering ahead of time. It seems this qualification certificate is rightfully yours~”
The flattering priest then turned to look at the few remaining interviewees, including me, with an impatient expression as if to say, “Why don’t you scram and let me give the certificate to the young master sooner?”
Their lazy performance finally made the few honest people left realize something was amiss.
“Priest! Is he cheating!?”
It’s more than cheating; it’s like an open-book exam.
If Longtao’er still managed to answer incorrectly, he wouldn’t just be an extra; he’d be an idiot! But, as clear as the situation was to any observant person, what could you bystanders do even if you brought it up?
“Cheating? Do you have any evidence?”
Longtao’er’s sneering voice was full of the pride of a victor, “Ordinary people should not dream of soaring to the skies. Just go back to your farming honestly!”
The chubby priest who followed also issued a stern reprimand, “You few are making baseless accusations! Your interview qualifications are canceled! Get out! The church does not welcome you!”
This was clearly an expulsion. Although they were so angry they almost resorted to violence, in the end, these bystanders were intimidated by Longtao’er’s burly henchmen and had to leave with heavy hearts and steps.
In the end, I was the only nuisance left, and Longtao’er, who had not paid any attention to me, a mere bystander, finally recognized me.
“You’re the one from yesterday…”
“Hello.”
As he recognized my face, Longtao’er’s face immediately filled with displeasure, “Damn it, you almost got me killed with your meddling yesterday, and you dare stand before me today!?”
He rolled up his sleeves as if ready to “beat me up,” but in the next instant, Longtao’er’s anger was suppressed by a glance from the chubby priest, followed by a snort from his nostrils.
“Hmph, forget it, I’m in a good mood today and can’t be bothered with you. Scram early and don’t waste my time. You still don’t have the brains to understand the situation, thinking you can interview to be a priest?”
Then Longtao’er gestured to the chubby priest, who was all smiles, to come over, “Let me make it clear to you, I’m just here to go through the motions and get the certificate. If you’re smart, you’ll scram early!”
Of course, there’s no need to mention the henchmen by his side. The chubby priest, and probably the entire church, are likely standing with Longtao’er. The chubby priest had also said this was the last priest qualification certificate recently, so Longtao’er seemed determined to get it and couldn’t be bothered to argue with me about yesterday’s incident.
…We’re all villains here, do you want to take it all?
“Lord Dragon Extra, you’re competing with us commoners for a priest qualification certificate. Even if you get it, it doesn’t seem like it would be of much use to you, right?”
“Pfft, commoners will always be commoners. In your hands, the certificate is nothing more than a means to a meal. In mine, it has a significant use!” Lord Dragon Extra lifted his head and laughed, “Let me tell you, once I get that certificate, I’m going to be the personal priest for the young miss of the Empire’s Mary Sue clan! That’s a whole different level compared to your struggle for daily bread!”
Huh?
“Hahaha, look how scared you are. After all, she’s a high and mighty figure you wouldn’t even catch a glimpse of in your lifetime! Know your place and scram!”
Lord Dragon Extra waved me off, trying to shoo me away as if I were livestock.
I was stunned in place, truly ‘frightened’ by Lord Dragon Extra’s grand delusions. I wonder what his reaction would be if I told him, “This morning, I was in bed with the goddess you worship.”
Taking a deep breath, I shook off the wild thoughts in my head. Originally, I just wanted to get the qualification certificate to make it easier to cling to Kefir’s coattails, but this unexpected turn of events brought by Dragon Extra made things a bit complicated. I didn’t want to cause trouble, but if I just left, I wouldn’t get the certificate, and then I wouldn’t be able to cling to Kefir’s coattails.
That’s a matter of life and death for me!
“Hey, kid, why haven’t you left yet?”
“Yeah, that’s right, you’re called… Li De, right? Hurry up and leave, don’t be a nuisance in the church.”
Thinking I was scared, not only Lord Dragon Extra but also the chubby priest were ‘kindly’ urging me to leave.
“Mr. Priest, is that all for the interview questions? Keep them coming.”
“What… you ungrateful brat!?”
Lord Dragon Extra’s face burst with veins, but the chubby priest stopped him.
“Never mind, Lord Dragon Extra, this blockhead seems to still be stubborn. I’ll ask another question to make him give up.”
With an impatient expression, the chubby priest asked perfunctorily.
“Cough cough! So, the third question, our church now…”
Lord Dragon Extra’s face showed a smug look, ready to answer, as if mocking me for being a fool. But the next moment…
He froze.
After all, it wasn’t him who answered, but me.
“114514 people. Next question, there are 810 high priests. The question after that, the Holy Maiden recently caught a cold, so she won’t be coming to the Empire.”
I looked at the chubby priest’s fat face, “How about it, Mr. Priest? I answered three questions in a row, am I ahead now?”
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