I Won’t Accept Your Regrets

Raymond knew my abilities.

So I have a reasonable question. What the heck?

He seemed surprised that he had taken the antidote, but he smiled bitterly at me.

"How could I tell you? I knew your abilities, but I wasn't sure that you could save the sacred flowers…. Because I was in no condition to beg you for my life."

"What are you talking about?”

"What if it didn't work out… It is obvious that you would feel guilty for the rest of the days."

“What do you mean by guilt…?”

“I was poisoned just to save Carlisle. And if the antidote failed, you would blame yourself for the rest of your life."

"…"

When I couldn't say anything, nothing wrong, Raymond continued with a soft smile.

"And could I tell you when I know all that? Until the last moment I didn’t give you anything good. But I couldn’t leave behind only a feeling of guilt. First of all, I can't say that Lisa's problem is not my fault."

"What nonsense is this…"

"I know. I know it's absurd and stupid, but no matter how much I think about it, I couldn't hurt you more."

He seemed to be sincere. And he didn't seem to regret his choice.

I screamed, angry at this statement:

"You hid it until the end. How can I be alright when you're dead? …If you die… No matter what the reason is, I can't be okay!"

"Ellie.”

As I screamed, Raymond's face froze with embarrassment. But then he smiled.

“… Are you laughing at this situation? I'm really mad right now."

"Sorry, sorry. But for you to be worried about me right now is…it's so good. I'm really crazy about you. I can only think about you."

‘Is this the effect of coming to the brink of death?'

Raymond didn’t hesitate.

However, I was happy to reveal my emotions without hiding.

Absurd feelings subsided in a moment.

Despite the fact that he was laughing like a child, his eyes suddenly darkened.

"I missed you so much."

I froze at his confession.

This is because I remembered him staring into the air with unfocused eyes and searching for me.

"…"

"Did you know? When I thought that I was really going to die now, I was more afraid of not being able to see you than the fact that I was going to die."

"Ray…"

“The end was near, but all that crossed my mind were my memories of you. I realized too late that you were the only light in my life. I'm sorry that I hurt you, Ellie."

My heart sank at his sincere words.

My eyes reddened from the comforting feeling of my past wounds when I always looked at his back.

"…I didn't mean to make you cry, but my God… Ellie, don't cry."

When the first teardrop fell, Raymond embarrassedly reached out to me. However, just before touching my cheek, he stopped his hand.

"Oh, I'm sorry."

Apologizing, as if he had made a mistake, he tried to take his hand away.

I held her receding hand and brought it hand to my cheeks.

"…Ellie?”

Raymond was stiff enough to harden his fingertips at my actions.

I slowly opened my lips, feeling the warmth of his hand.

"I missed you too. You were also the light of my life. Even though I always had to watch your back…”

"…"

“Thank you for coming down to me, albeit late, and showing me your sincerity. So let's be together forever. Hold on tight so that I don't run away anymore."

Raymond's black eyes trembled, as if he couldn’t comprehend if what was really happening.

"…Are you serious?"

"If I’m not serious, what am I doing here? Well, if you don't like it…"

The moment I looked into his eyes as if I was piercing him and removed my cheek from his hand, he grabbed me tightly, as if not wanting to let go again.

"There's no way I don't like it. I thought I was dreaming, and I couldn't believe it…" He pulled my hand, speaking in a trembling voice, unable to control his surging feelings.

He gently touched my face, seeking confirmation that it was real.

So he slowly ran his fingers from my forehead to the tip of my nose, past my eyebrows and cupped my cheeks with both hands.

"Ellie… You are with me now, right? Do you forgive me?"

"…Yes. So don't ever take me for granted again."

"I won't do anything stupid again. I swear! …You should swear too."

"Why?"

At that moment, I looked at him embarrassed, but he looked at me as if he meant it.

"You will never leave me again. Please swear!"

He spoke with serious eyes.

"I swear. I will never leave you again."

The moment this quiet whisper rang out, his eyes filled with joy.

Raymond, whose face had a bright smile I had never seen before, tightened his hands around my face.

As soon as our faces were close enough to feel each other's breath, I closed my eyes, and our lips intertwined in a kiss.

A slightly dry texture gently enveloped my lips.

"Mm…"

Raymond kissed my lips softly and deeply, just as the emotions he had endured erupted.

I put my arm around his neck as if his feelings were spilling out. As if I wasn't going to fall again.

We have been eagerly confirming and confirming each other's sincerity for a long time

* * *

One week later.

"Wow, it's so big!"

Carlisle laughed at the tall tree.

I smiled at Carlisle and also looked at the large tree that I saw after so many years.

The place with a large tree, which the whole family now visited, was the birthplace of Raymond's mother.

Returning to the palace, I remembered about this place, but I thought I no longer have a connection with it, and tried to get it out of my head.

And, ironically, that was the first place that came to my mind after reconciling with my heart.

So, when Raymond got stronger, we went to the place where his mother once lived.

I was worried that if I left, the tree would die.

Contrary to my fears, the blossoming tree looked full of vigor.

Carlisle, looking at the large tree, asked Raymond.

"Is this really my father's tree?"

"Yeah. This is the tree that your grandmother planted with the wishes of my health. And after your grandmother died… Your mother saved that tree. This tree means a lot to me."

" Wow…! So it is a very beautiful tree. This tree that is like my father's brother."

" Brother… I see. This tree is like my twin. So please take good care of this tree, Carlisle."

"Of course! I'll take care of this tree from now on!"

As Carlisle spoke vigorously, Raymond smiled and stroked Carlisle's head.

"Yes, I think the tree will be very happy if Cain sometimes waters it and tells it to bloom beautifully."

“Oh! Can I get some water and give it to the tree?"

Carlisle took it seriously, suddenly asked for water and ran somewhere.

Helen followed the Crown Prince and I turned to Raymond.

"I thought you forgot , but you remembered."

“I forgot. But one day I accidentally passed that place, and saw a tree standing alone. I immediately realized how much it misses you. It was then that I understood all my feelings for you."

Raymond said putting his hand on the tree.

"Since then I have looked after this tree, as well as the palace of the Empress. I thought if I let the tree die, you will definitely never come back to me."

"…"

“In the end, the tree fulfilled my wish. Now you are by my side."

When he raised his hand from the tree, he looked at me and smiled.

At that moment, with a playful smile, Carlisle ran in as if he had found a bag of water somewhere.

"Carlisle, don’t rush."

"Ha, haa… Mom. May I pour some water? They told me it's clear water that people drink!"

Carlisle asked permission with a face like he wanted to do something meaningful.

"Of course," I smiled softly and nodded.

To my answer, Carlisle watered the tree very carefully.

Carlisle, who spilled the last drop from the bag of water, smiled happily and put his hand on the tree.

"Tree, always be healthy. I will protect you from now on."

Carlisle, who had made such a promise to the tree, suddenly turned around and looked at Raymond and me in turn.

"Mother, father."

"Yes?"

To Carlisle’s call, Raymond responded. Then Carlisle smiled and said.

"I like being together like this. Let's come here more often, together!"

Carlisle couldn’t hide the happiness from his face.

At that moment, Raymond and my gazes met.

We no longer need to avoid each other or be embarrassed.

After all, we have already fully accepted each other.

In his youth, the old days became so awkward, sad and painful, and everything turned upside down, like a kaleidoscope.

I laughed and said to Carlisle:

"Okay. We will come here and play together all the time."

"Holding hands like this."

Raymond stealthily grabbed my hand and put in his word. He folded his eyes in a crescent shape and smiled.

But soon,

"I want to join hands with you!"

Suddenly Raymond was pushed by Carlisle, who stepped right into the middle. A smile broke out on my disappointed face and a smile spread across Raymond's mouth at my laughter.

"Hehe, I like it," Carlisle gave happy smile.

At our bright and pleasant new beginning, I looked up at the big tree and prayed in my heart.

‘May this happiness last forever.'