Kiss the Ground

Chahyun reminisced about the moments he encountered Misha today – once in the cafeteria and once during a practice match. So, Misha had witnessed scenes where Chahyun conversed with Lucy in the cafeteria or received an examination from Alana on the ground.They were not the only ones. There were countless others, both men and women, working in the club. Naturally, Misha would connect their faces with Chahyun’s words about having a partner because that’s how human emotions work. Mentally, Chahyun apologized countless times to those who would unexpectedly become involved with him due to his words.“So… starting tomorrow, let’s just greet each other as usual, as teammates. I think it’ll be better for both you and me.”“…”“Let’s prepare for the next game together, and don’t avoid each other during practice.”Chahyun turned away from Misha, who had fallen silent as if forgetting to breathe. He released his hand. It was entirely up to Misha Asplund to sort out the emotions that followed.Misha’s heart was pure but young. He didn’t know how to consider and think about others. Even if he gained fame in soccer at the age of twenty-three, it was an age where emotions might not be mature. Extending his body beyond the corridor, Chahyun thought about when Misha would reach his age. By then, Misha might be able to like someone more skillfully.However, that someone would certainly not be Yoon Chahyun.“Yuan.”Misha grabbed Chahyun’s arm then. In response to the pressuring grip, Chahyun reflexively turned around. Misha, holding his arm as if it hurt, was looking at him with sharp eyes. The words that followed struck Chahyun’s ears with a sense of disbelief.“Not being able to score just because there’s a goalkeeper? What kind of nonsense is that?”Where on earth did he learn such words?That was the first thought that came to Chahyun’s mind. Staring at Misha with widened pupils in shock, Yoon Chahyun couldn’t utter a word. Was this kid watching variety shows at home or something? He was too serious for such a frivolous question. Several long seconds passed as they faced each other in the silent corridor.Unexpectedly, it was Misha who started to waver first at the sight of Chahyun, whose mouth was wide open as if he had been hit. Initially, his expression seemed puzzled, then it turned into confusion, and slowly, into anxiety. Hesitant words flowed from his hesitant mouth.“…Did I say something wrong? I meant even if there’s someone else in Yuan’s life, I won’t give up….”“Is that right?!”Chahyun interrupted Misha and shouted quickly. It was already said, but hearing the interpretation from the same mouth was another damage.“No… Misha.”Yoon Chahyun raised his hand and took a deep breath slowly. He had no morals to fabricate facts to cover the situation, but Misha was even worse. Were all kids like this nowadays? Misha’s unexpected disorderliness, whether Chahyun had a partner or not, made him feel an inappropriate sense of dislocation. His mouth moved before his mind.“I’m not a goalkeeper, I’m a striker.”“…”“I’m also in the position to score…”No, the tone of this… Chahyun wanted to cover his head with his hands at the casually blurted words. Amidst the impending crisis, a deep and low voice came from behind.“That’s really offensive.”Chahyun and Misha both turned their heads towards the source of the sound simultaneously. Standing in front of the corridor was Winchester’s number 1, Lou Ekein, with his imposing figure less than 2 meters tall and arms folded.Since the locker room lynching incident (which wasn’t real), Lou had been watching Misha and Chahyun with respect, but now it seemed like he was following them into the building, presumably to settle the matter. Chahyun quickly removed Misha’s hand that had been gripping his arm.“Isn’t that a bit too harsh to hear?”What did he hear and from where? Suddenly, a shiver ran down Chahyun’s spine. Knowing Lou’s serious nature, he wouldn’t lightly joke about what he heard, but Chahyun didn’t want anyone to know about his and Misha’s issue right now. Lou released his arms and walked slowly towards them. Then, he spoke solemnly.“I’m not sure what strategy you’re discussing, but…”“Lou.”“Goalkeepers have the honorable role of staying on the front lines alone when the team is in crisis. I am proud to have this position. Even if I allow goals in the end, I will not give up on the game. Never underestimate a goalkeeper, Misha Asplund.”Lou, who heard only a very brief part of the conversation, had a very solemn expression. For a moment, Chahyun and Misha couldn’t say anything. It was a rare moment when their intentions coincided. Chahyun belatedly signaled to Misha.“Explain, and you’re dead.”Seemingly understanding Chahyun’s stern gaze, Misha meekly averted his eyes and mumbled, “I apologize, Ekein. It was thoughtless.”“Accept it. Everyone can make mistakes.”A gentlemanly handshake between Misha and Lou took place in front of them. This is going crazy… Chahyun covered his face with his hands.It felt like he was losing his mind.****57884: [YoonPudding’s mental state is sweet~~~^^ I’m melting~~~] 57888: [Lately, the size is totally early soccer level, lol. Did you see the recent training video?] 57893: [I really don’t understand. Why did he suddenly become a frog?;; Is it a real slump?] 57897: [It might be that fatigue has accumulated since the 20th goal. Even a round trip by plane takes a day, and probably, there hasn’t been much rest since the Umberti game. Now he needs a break to recover his game skills a bit, but Winchester doesn’t have other attackers either. Kayhill is also unable to use his strength lately due to injury, and Aloys Winston Judd’s line is just so-so. The most frustrating thing would be Yoon Chahyun himself… If he continues like this, this season might end without any significance. Birmingham FC in the Round of 16 is not an easy team to deal with. Above all, the perennial issue of Yoon Chahyun losing control at crucial moments…]Chahyun, standing in the center of the club’s first-floor lobby, pressed the home button on his phone that had been watching. The posts that had been in front of his eyes disappeared in an instant, and only his expression reflected on the black screen. It was a living hell.“Why am I like this….”He shouldn’t have checked the internet. However, it was already too late. Hearing sharp criticisms and blame from others was refreshing, like pinching a bug bite, but at the same time, it hurt and felt embarrassing. Even now, he knew how to selectively remember words that could be helpful and those that were not. And at the moment, there was no need to seek out more pain.The public opinion, which had relatively high support while discussing Yoon Chahyun’s current performance, had recently shifted in a worrisome direction. The turning point was a training video uploaded to Winchester United FC’s media account. It was a service video ambitiously opened by the club’s management to keep up with the video marketing trend.Videos showing players running, stretching, or participating in practice matches, depicting their usual selves, were not something fans typically sought out unless they were hardcore supporters of the club. However, the fans of Yoon Chahyun, who had been making headlines in the news for days, had a different level of interest. The problem was that Yoon Chahyun’s current state was not good enough to fill their fandom.“No, if you’re going to film something like that, you should discuss it beforehand….”Chahyun’s passing connections and goal-scoring abilities were not great, to say the least. His struggling appearance was turned into high-quality GIFs, spreading across various online communities and sports-related forums. The bad news was the situation itself, and the only good news was that the ‘Kiss.gif’ meme from Saint Ainsworth Stadium had disappeared.Well, whether it’s a kiss or nonsense, it doesn’t matter. The crucial point was whether he could make it to the Round of 16 lineup, which remained uncertain.“…A slump?”Uttering the forbidden word and realizing it, Chahyun smacked his own mouth. Putting such ominous words into his mouth was regrettable due to the lingering effect of the article he had read earlier.“That’s not it. It can’t be like that.”Although he deliberately voiced a denial, he couldn’t help but feel the remnants of anxiety lingering in his mind. There seemed to be no way out. It wasn’t just a slump, and how could he explain the situation where he only stood in front of the goalpost?“Misha….”Was it because of Misha? Could such a thing really happen?Immediately, the image that came to his mind was Alana MacKnight’s face. The serious and trustworthy team doctor of Winchester. However, explaining his condition would inevitably require addressing the issue in front of him—the things related to Misha. What kind of face would Alana make when she heard that story?Dilemmas piled up. As a result, Yoon Chahyun failed to notice the approaching colleagues right next to him.“Yuan, what’s going on?”“Ah, Aloys.”“I saw him from a distance, sulking alone, mumbling to himself, then suddenly hitting himself.”Aloys imitated that scene, laughing, and then wrapped his arm around Chahyun’s neck. The tattoos intricately engraved to the fingertips seemed stern at first glance, but Aloys had a simple and easy-going personality, more than it appeared. While exercising, he could be a bit rough, but it was similar to Chahyun’s level. Aloys’s close friend Winston, who was standing behind, patted Chahyun’s back with the team bag in his hand and said,“It’s our time off. Your cooling-down is over too, right? We’re going to have dinner now, want to join us? Donobi recommended a Chinese restaurant, and it’s really good.”“The one in Saint Clement?”“Yuan heard about it too?”“Donobi has been praising the cream shrimp there all week; you couldn’t not know.”Aloys chuckled, shaking his head. Chahyun also laughed a bit, but the good mood didn’t last long.“But I don’t want to go today… If I eat now, I feel like I’m going to vomit.”“Because of the things that haven’t been going well lately?”“If I take care of eating a bit and sleep well at home, I’ll be fine soon!”“Just because you can’t solve it doesn’t mean you can’t eat. Is that it?”Chahyun shook his head. Looking at Aloys and Winston comforting him, he sighed. While it would be nice if things were as simple as those two, Yoon Chahyun was a more complicated person than he thought. He didn’t realize it for 27 years of his life. Aloys and Winston looked at each other as they faced Chahyun’s tired face and eventually let him go.“Well, we can’t force you to come. Instead, call us anytime if you change your mind. We’ll have your order placed.”“Got it. Go ahead.”Aloys and Winston disappeared outside the lobby, making noise like high school students. Watching their cheerful figures, Chahyun picked up his team bag. He needed to wash up and get a good rest at home. Chahyun sincerely hoped that it would be possible.***“Yoon Chahyun!”Approaching his parked car, Chahyun was startled and dropped his keys at the sudden sound of his native language. While it wasn’t uncommon for him to have conversations with Korean officials several times a day, hearing it unexpectedly in the club parking lot was unusual.Turning towards the source of the sound, he saw an Asian man in his thirties standing there. He was slightly shorter than Yoon Chahyun, wearing a Winchester FC uniform sold in the store and carrying a large backpack.“I didn’t expect to meet you here!”Is he a fan? Before he could say anything, the man quickly approached and picked up the keys that Chahyun dropped.The man had a tense yet excited smile on his face, a familiar expression that people who faced Yoon Chahyun often made. Seeing the trembling hands, it was apparent that he was nervous.“I came from Korea! I’m a huge fan!”“Oh, really? Thank you…”The man stared at Chahyun’s face with an admiring expression, as if he couldn’t believe he was seeing him in person. Then, as an afterthought, he handed over the keys he had been holding. Reflexively, Chahyun reached out to receive the keys, which were damp with sweat.“I didn’t expect to meet you in person like this… It feels like real luck. Wow, how did I meet you so quickly? You look so cool in person, really.”“Oh, it’s just the same… Thank you.”The man, fixated on Chahyun’s face as if he forgot to respond, consistently showed an excited expression. It was the first fan he had met since returning to the UK last week. Smiling at the man, Chahyun suddenly asked.“But how did you get in here? There’s security at the entrance, and outsiders usually aren’t allowed in. I still occasionally get caught.”“Oh, there was none today? Maybe it’s a day off. Chahyun, can you take a picture with me, please?”Reaching into his back pocket, the man took out his phone. It slipped a few times due to his nervous hands, but he managed to grab it and activated the camera. Turning his back to Chahyun and raising the camera, the man stood with his legs spread. Chahyun stood next to him, bending his legs awkwardly, and they posed. The smartphone screen displayed the moving cat ears and whiskers on the man’s face, and Chahyun’s face.“Oh, this filter is cute.”Smiling, Chahyun responded while the man, without saying anything, consecutively pressed the shutter button ten times.Click, click, click, click. The shutter sound was loud.“That’s really amazing. I’m going to print this on a banner and hang it on my balcony at home. So everyone in the neighborhood can see it.”“Really? Then, let’s take better shots. Please use Photoshop.”He couldn’t wait to check the captured photo, swiping the screen with his index finger. My fan… Watching the man continuously examining his phone, Chahyun hesitated before speaking.“Thank you for your support. I’ve been a bit off lately… not hearing many good things, right? Even on the internet, they say I’m not doing well…”“Ignore those things! Those idiots spouting nonsense… those who talk recklessly. Those damn idiots.”The man suddenly turned his head towards Chahyun, looking serious. It happened in an instant. Chahyun blinked, forgetting to close his eyes. The man, who had spat out profanity in a flash, looked at Chahyun with wide eyes, then burst into a sheepish laugh as if the moment had passed.“I got a bit excited. I genuinely support you, Yoon Chahyun. I can’t stand hearing such things.”“No, I, uh, appreciate it. Thank you for liking me so much…”Chahyun smiled awkwardly. Remembering something, the man, who had been laughing heartily, took off the backpack wrapped around his shoulders.“I actually have something to ask you, Chahyun. It’s important. I came all the way here because of this… Would you take a look?”“Sure? What is it?”The man reached into his backpack and rummaged around. The sound of something hitting against each other echoed as he fumbled through the large volume inside.“It’s this.”After a while of searching, the man took something out of his backpack and showed it to Chahyun. During this time, he continued to wear a smiling face.“Oh, this is the away uniform and the third uniform! You bought all three, including the home, right? It must have cost quite a bit.”“I couldn’t help it after becoming a fan. I even included the markings and this season’s league patch on all three. Want to see?”Reaching into the backpack, the man pulled out Winchester’s uniforms. The white letters clearly engraved on the back, “12, C.H.YUN.,” were undoubtedly Yoon Chahyun’s back number and name.The jerseys for sale, which were of almost the same quality as the ones the players used, were inherently expensive, and the prices skyrocketed even more with various added options. Three sets of those… He must be a really devoted fan. Without giving Chahyun a chance to react, the man kept pulling out something from his backpack.Water bottle, towel, phone case… Various goods with Winchester FC’s logo were spread out in front of Chahyun. The last thing the man pulled out after rummaging through the bottom of the backpack was a name pen.“Please sign everything here.”There was something strangely charming about his determined expression while making such a request. Chahyun gladly accepted the pen the man handed him.“Do you want me to sign on the front of the uniform?”“Yes, please sign it prominently on the chest.”As Chahyun signed the uniform, the man, as if determined not to miss a single detail, recorded a video of him with his phone. All the items filling up the large backpack were Winchester FC goods? Intrigued, Chahyun struck up a conversation with the man.“How long have you been in the UK?”“I arrived yesterday after touring Sweden and Denmark as the last leg of my trip.”“Wow… You’ve been traveling in Europe. Must have been really enjoyable. I envy you. I can’t even go nearby…”“Well, other places were just okay. The UK was my real destination.”“You’re a passionate fan. How long will you be staying?”“I’ll be here for another two weeks. Actually, I won a Winchester Club Open Training Day ticket.”“No way, really?”Chahyun looked at the man’s face in surprise, putting down the beer glass he was signing. The man had a proud and pleased expression. Considering that it was a rare ticket that was not only limited to a thousand people through online draws but also mostly won by local fans, it was quite an achievement.“Wow, that’s amazing! People were saying it’s really difficult to get that… They don’t even give priority to players’ families, saying it should be fair.”“I prayed really hard for it. I asked to be chosen.”What an incredibly pure person. Perhaps luck finds its way to people like him. With that thought, Chahyun finished signing and closed the pen lid. After it was over, he realized that his wrist was slightly sore.The man neatly packed the goods he received from Chahyun back into his backpack, just like how they were arranged at the beginning. Draping the backpack around him again, the man looked at Chahyun with a nervous yet smiling face, just like when they first met.“Yoon Chahyun, it was really nice meeting you. I’ll keep cheering for you in the future.”“Thank you very much.”“I’ll also cheer for you during the open training!”Standing at attention, the man raised his clenched right fist while making a playful cheering gesture, bringing a smile to Chahyun’s face. Due to the incessant online criticism, he had forgotten that there were fans who genuinely liked him. His parched heart felt refreshed as if touched by gentle rain. As the man turned to leave, Chahyun called him back.“Um, would you consider coming to watch the Birmingham game? It’s right after the open training next week.”“Birmingham? Well, I probably won’t go there.”After briefly considering something, the man shook his head.“That’s okay, then.”The casually replied man gave one more nod of acknowledgement to Chahyun before disappearing in an instant. If he was such an enthusiastic fan, it would have been nice for him to watch the game since he came all the way for sightseeing.Left alone, Chahyun opened the car door happily. The heavy feeling from earlier seemed to have flown away somewhere. The unexpectedly received compliments strangely elevated his mood. Maybe it’s time to stop reading criticisms on the internet for a while.Sitting in the driver’s seat, Chahyun turned on his phone and dialed Winston’s contact. It was probably not too late to taste the cream shrimp at Saint Clement’s. After a long time, his stomach growled satisfyingly.