Lost

My throat felt rough. It was stuffy, as if something was stuck, and I started coughing dryly. As I struggled to cough, a cool hand touched my forehead. The gentle touch on my forehead and hair brought me comfort. Just as I was about to drift back to sleep, I suddenly opened my eyes. The sudden movement made my head throb painfully.“Sunbae, you’re awake?”This scene felt familiar. It seemed like something similar had happened before. I closed my eyes and groaned, trying to remember what I had done in the bathroom before I passed out. I clenched my fist and slowly opened my eyes. As expected, there was Jung Woojin, looking at me with a concerned expression.“Why are you sleeping so much? Was it that exhausting?”“……”I still couldn’t fully grasp the situation. What on earth had happened? The only saving grace was that this time, I could think clearly. My head hurt a bit, but it wasn’t as disoriented as it was before I fainted. I slowly raised my arm and looked at my hand. As I opened and closed my fist, Jung Woojin took my hand.“Aren’t you hungry?”“Jung Woojin.”“Sunbae, I told you, you can just call me Woojin.”“Let go.”Even though I could have easily shaken off his hand, I looked straight at Jung Woojin and spoke coldly. His expression changed at the sound of my icy voice. He looked at me with a blank expression and asked,“Are you angry?”“Don’t give me that crap. Let go.”Jung Woojin sighed and released my hand. I slowly lifted my upper body and looked around. Before I passed out, Jung Woojin had mentioned that we were in Jeju Island. Or rather, he had said we were at a villa near Jeju Island. My head started to throb again. As I let out a low groan, Jung Woojin reached for my hand again.“Sunbae, are you in a lot of pain…?”“I said let go, you bastard.”“……”“Bring me my clothes and my phone.”I didn’t care whether we were near Jeju Island or not. I just wanted to go home and fall asleep as soon as possible. Why Jung Woojin had done this to me, or why he had brought me here, were questions for later.“Sunbae.”“Don’t make me repeat myself. If you don’t want your mouth ripped open, that is.”If I could, I would’ve beaten that bastard’s face into a pulp right then and there. But I could barely muster any strength. I had no feeling below my waist, and I wasn’t even sure I could stand properly. I closed my eyes briefly and then opened them again, and Jung Woojin was still standing there, not having moved an inch. I glanced at him and spoke again.“Clothes. Phone.”“……”Jung Woojin just stared at me, his lips tightly shut. I could see his dark eyes trembling terribly. His face looked so innocent and pitiful that it almost brought tears to my eyes, but instead, I raised my hand. With a loud smack, Jung Woojin’s pale cheek turned bright red.“I said bring me my clothes and phone.”His head, which had turned to the side, slowly returned to face me. Those pitch-black eyes were once again staring straight at me. I felt anger rising to the very top of my head.“You bastard, bring me my clothes and phone!”“They’re gone.”“What?”“They’re gone. Your clothes and your phone.”What the hell is this bastard saying right now? As I stared at him in disbelief, Jung Woojin reached out and grabbed my hand again.“You haven’t eaten anything since yesterday. You should eat something first…”Damn it, why does this bastard keep talking about food?“Are you out of your mind? Do you really want to get beaten to death? Can’t you see what’s going on? Damn it, do you even understand what you’ve done…!”“I made abalone porridge while you were sleeping. Since your stomach is empty, let’s start with that and then have a proper meal later.”Jung Woojin stood up. I could only stare blankly at his retreating back as he slowly walked out of the room. The sound of the door clicking shut snapped me back to reality. Without further thought, I threw off the blanket and stood up on the floor. The moment my feet touched the ground, a sharp pain shot through my waist. I was completely naked, not even wearing underwear, so I wrapped the blanket around myself and struggled to move. When I pulled aside the thick curtains, it was so dark outside that I couldn’t see anything. Not even a single light.Without thinking, I opened the window and jumped down. It was so dark that I couldn’t see an inch in front of me. The grass that brushed against my bare legs stung, the leaves that grazed my face hurt, and the stones under my feet were all painful. But I couldn’t stop. I just needed to find someone, anyone, and everything would be resolved. A house, a store, anything would do. A police station would be ideal. I frantically ran down the mountain path. I almost fell dozens of times, but fortunately, I didn’t end up rolling down the hill disgracefully. My breath hitched as I gasped for air. As I kept running, I finally saw a wide, flat area ahead. My face lit up, and I ran even faster.“Huff, huff…”But the closer I got to the flat ground, the more my expression twisted. Something was wrong. This wasn’t right. There was nothing here. Everything was pitch-black. The soft sand under my feet and the faint, annoying sound of waves I’d been hearing for a while now… Before me was nothing but a vast darkness.“Sunbae.”“…”I slowly turned my head to look in the direction of the voice. There stood Jung Woojin, looking at me, completely unruffled. I was drenched in sweat, panting, but Jung Woojin didn’t seem even slightly out of breath. A streetlight flickered as if it were broken, casting an eerie light. Every time it grew dark and then brightened again, Jung Woojin seemed to get closer to me.“Take your walks after the sun comes up. It’s dangerous to go out at night.”“…”“You’re hurt.”He knelt in front of me. Then, placing my foot on his knee, he inspected my injury closely, frowning. Slowly, I lifted my head and stared at the vast darkness. That enormous darkness was the pitch-black sea. The sound of waves crashing in my ears. The soft sand beneath my feet. And the huge villa visible in the distance.My mind went cold.“Where… is this?”“I told you, it’s a villa near Jeju Island. This isn’t good. Sunbae, let me carry you.”As I stared blankly at Jung Woojin, who was holding my ankle, I kicked him. He dodged swiftly but let go of my ankle. I turned around and ran toward the darkness with all my might. But I didn’t make it far before his hand caught me.“Sunbae, when the sun comes up…”“Let go of me!”“You’re hurt, so let’s go back inside and get you treated…”“I said let go! Damn it, let go!”The streetlight flickered violently. Darkness fell upon the world for a moment. When the light came back on, I was pinned under Jung Woojin. His lips were split, bleeding, and he looked like a crazed serial killer from a movie.“Damn it, just stay still.”Jung Woojin’s eyes were darker than the ocean behind him. His weight pressed down on me like a thousand pounds. I couldn’t move, and I held my breath as he slipped his hand behind my knee.“Why would you come down a mountain with no path when there’s a proper road? Use the stairs next time.”“…”“And wear shoes when you go out. Even though the sand looks soft, there are lots of shells, so you could get hurt. Look, your feet are all scraped up.”Jung Woojin lifted my foot. He slowly wiped the sand, dirt, and blood from my foot. Then, he clicked his tongue at the scratch on my ankle. Lowering his head, he licked the long cut on my ankle.“The door’s unlocked, so don’t try to go out the window.”“…”He kissed the corner of my eye and stood up. Watching Jung Woojin, who was calm and collected, I found myself unable to move. As he observed me, frozen stiff, he lifted me like a princess and slowly started walking.“Once you feel better, do you want to go swimming? It’s too hot during the day, so we can do it at night. Do you know how to fish? We could do that too.”“…Jung Woojin.”“Just call me Woojin.”“Where is this…”Jung Woojin, who was slowly climbing the stairs, looked down at me. His expression was overly kind and bright.“It’s an island. A small island near Jeju. Since it’s just the two of us, how about we do it outside next time?”“…”“Sex. No one will see us if we do it outside.”Watching Jung Woojin smile brightly made me feel nauseous, and my mouth filled with saliva. Quickly turning my head away, I clamped my mouth shut, and by the time I did, we had arrived back at the house. Jung Woojin set me down on the sofa and brought a first-aid kit. He wiped my dirty feet with a hot towel, then licked each of my wounds with his tongue. Every time his soft tongue passed over my injuries, I thrashed and cursed, but he remained completely unfazed, tying my wrists to the sofa.“Stop it, you bastard!”When my big toe went into Jung Woojin’s mouth, I kicked him in the face. But he easily grabbed my ankle and licked between my toes with his tongue. I couldn’t comprehend what was happening. Why the hell was this guy sucking on my foot? Is this real? Not a dream? What’s going on? I was so bewildered that I could only scream and curse like an idiot.“Sunbae.”“Damn it, let go… Let go of me!”“Can’t you just stay still while I treat your wounds?”Treat? You call this treatment? As I was about to shout, Jung Woojin licked the bottom of my foot in a long stroke. My body trembled, and I shut my eyes. I heard laughter from below. When I opened my eyes again, I saw Jung Woojin smiling up at me. My anger flared up to the top of my head. Sitting on the floor, Jung Woojin hugged both of my knees and buried his face in them. He was so strong that I couldn’t move an inch.“Sunbae.”“Why are you doing this? Damn it, why are you doing this to me?!”“If you hurt yourself one more time without my permission, I’ll tie you to the bed.”“What?”He looked at the wounds on my legs with a pitiful expression. Despite having applied ointment with a cotton swab earlier, he started licking the wounds again as if it didn’t matter at all. I clenched my fists, gritting my teeth.“Don’t get hurt. It upsets me.”“Damn it, this is driving me crazy.”“Sunbae, I love you.”Jung Woojin was begging me. His eyes, his gestures, his whole demeanor proved it. He didn’t get angry; he just pleaded, looking at me so tenderly and desperately. It was then that I finally realized something was seriously wrong. ＊ ＊ ＊ Jung Woojin went to the kitchen, leaving me tied up. I tried twisting my wrists to free myself, but it only hurt more, and I couldn’t get loose. I cursed under my breath, grinding my teeth. My wrists were crossed behind my back, tied to the sofa, so I couldn’t even stand up. As I twisted my body around, the soles of my feet started to sting. My cheeks hurt, my injured legs hurt, and my wrists hurt too. In fact, my whole body ached as if I had a fever.“Sunbae.”He approached with a tray, carrying a steaming bowl of porridge and a glass of water. He set the tray on the table in front of the sofa and sat down next to me. Just the sight of his pale face made my blood boil.“Love? You’re sitting there talking about love, you bastard.”Despite my sudden sneer, Jung Woojin didn’t even blink. He scooped up a spoonful of abalone porridge, blew on it, then checked if it was cool enough by touching it to his lips before bringing it to mine.“Eat.”“Get that away from me.”I coldly turned my head away. Jung Woojin persistently brought the spoon to my lips. When I kept turning my head and clamping my mouth shut, he grabbed my chin with his other hand. It didn’t hurt, but I couldn’t turn my head anymore.“Open your mouth.”I wanted to curse him out, but I was afraid he’d shove the spoon into my mouth if I did, so I couldn’t. As I gritted my teeth and glared at him, Jung Woojin sighed.“What’s the matter? Don’t want to eat the porridge?”“…”“Or are you afraid it’s poisoned?”Jung Woojin chuckled and put the spoon in his own mouth. He chewed the abalone porridge, swallowed it, and said,“There’s no poison. I just ate it, didn’t I? Stop being stubborn and eat. You haven’t eaten anything since yesterday.”I didn’t want to look at his damn face, but with my chin held, I couldn’t turn away. I could only shift my eyes to the side. When I averted my gaze, his grip on my chin tightened. Soon, his thumb pried its way between my tightly closed lips. I took the chance and bit down hard on his thumb. I tasted the bitter tang of blood, but Jung Woojin didn’t make a sound and calmly said,“You’re still as stubborn as ever.”He muttered to himself. I looked at him with a puzzled expression. Still as ever? That remark was strange, and I furrowed my brow in confusion. With his thumb still in my mouth, Jung Woojin picked up the spoon with his other hand. Was he really going to force-feed me? I tried to twist my body with all my might, but Jung Woojin put the spoon back into his mouth. Suddenly, a bad feeling came over me.Sure enough, after a few chews, Jung Woojin grabbed my chin and kissed me. The lukewarm abalone porridge flowed into my mouth. Frozen in shock, I shuddered as he pressed down on the base of my tongue, forcing me to swallow it.“Ugh! Cough!”“Do you want to keep eating like this? I don’t mind.”“You damn bastard!”“It’s going to take you an hour to finish one bowl of porridge at this rate.”“Let me go!”“I’ll let you go when you finish it. Just eat.”“You filthy piece of shit!”“Alright, fine, just eat it, damn it. Do you want to starve to death?”Jung Woojin picked up the spoon again and shoved it into his own mouth. I reflexively shouted out.“Untie me! Damn it, I’ll eat, so untie me—mmph!”The abalone porridge flowed into my mouth again. I tried to spit it out with my tongue, but it was no use. Jung Woojin’s lips and tongue completely blocked my mouth. I bit down on his tongue as hard as I could as he tried to press down on the base of my tongue again. Jung Woojin flinched and trembled for a moment, but in the end, I had no choice but to swallow the porridge. As he started to pull away, I bit down on his lips again. Jung Woojin licked the blood oozing from his lips and said,“I didn’t season it because I know you like your food bland. Does it suit your taste?”“…Ha.”I glared at him, trembling with anger. But Jung Woojin ignored my glare and picked up the spoon again. I gritted my teeth and spoke quietly.“Untie my arms.”“I’ll untie you when you finish the bowl.”“I’ll eat it, so untie me.”“No.”“Damn it, untie me!”“No.”His dark eyes flickered with anger. Jung Woojin just stared at me for a while before bringing the spoon to my lips again. I wanted to turn my head away, but I couldn’t. Who knows what twisted thing Jung Woojin would do if I did? Trembling with rage, I opened my mouth.“Does it taste good?”“It’s fucking disgusting, you bastard.”“Sorry, I’ll make it better next time.”I swallowed the porridge almost without chewing. As I did, Jung Woojin reached out and brushed my lips with his fingers—the same fingers I had bitten, now bleeding.“Get your hands off me.”“You bit me, Sunbae. It hurts.”“It’s disgusting. Get off.”“That’s scary.”Jung Woojin chuckled and leaned in to lick my lips. I quickly turned my head, but not before his tongue grazed my lips.“Jung Woojin.”“You really don’t listen, do you? Just call me Woojin.”“Why are you doing this to me?”“Do you hate the porridge that much? How about some braised ribs instead?”“Damn it! Stop talking nonsense and answer me properly!”When I screamed at him, Jung Woojin sighed.“Why are you doing this?”“Because I want to be with you, Sunbae.”“What?”“I want to be with you.”I let out a hollow laugh. He’s saying he tied me up here because he wants to be with me? What kind of bullshit is that? This bastard, he’s not a child. He must be crazy. When I turned my head in disbelief, Jung Woojin brought the spoonful of porridge back to my lips. Irritated, I opened my mouth and bit down hard on the spoon.“Be careful not to hurt yourself while you’re eating.”“Why do you want to be with me?”I swallowed the porridge without chewing. Jung Woojin, who had been responding to my questions so readily, suddenly fell silent. I wondered what he was going to say. Is he going to spout that nonsense about love again? Or something else? Why is this guy doing this to me?“Sunbae.”“Talk.”“Do you like older guys?”“What?”I frowned at the sudden question. What kind of nonsense is this?“Do you hate younger guys? What about me? I can really do well… I won’t do anything you don’t like. I’ll do everything you ask me to.”I was too shocked to respond, just staring at Jung Woojin. He put the spoon down and grabbed my shoulders. His touch was desperate.