Maniac’s Mayhem: A guide to being a corporate slave

Chapter Three: and it isn’t even my birthday



“Well that was unpleasant,” I say when I finally breach the final layer of debris that I have been worming my way out of. To say that it took me a long time to do so was an understatement, but I am free now and have fresh air. Well, as good as it's going to get down here. And wouldn’t you know it, lucky me the incursion seems to be over, I see several people gathering close by. So I walk up to them.

“Hello, how is it going, what is the word on the incursion status?”

The man I was talking to turns around. And oh protector, he has worms coming out of his everything! He raises one of his hands as he comes closer to me.

“LYSSA!!” I scream

Coming right up

and just as promised in my right hand a shiny claymore appears, it is a sleek black, but there is no time to admire the sword, as I swing it around, hacking the worm zombie … zombie worm… body jacker… ooh whatever! Where once was a man there are now two pieces of him. Sadly, the proximity ensured that some of the unholy goop landed on me and I feel something crawling against my skin

“LYSSA WHAT IS GOING ON?” I shout in a more shrill voice than I would like to admit

Model 7s implant themselves in people or creatures, so they can bring them to a hive for conversion into biofuel. Be careful not to get infected

As I look down at the man or what is left of him, some pieces are still moving, I make the executive decision to run away. I am not dealing with this issue, nope, you can’t make me.

“Lyssa, is there a way to not turn into one of those?” I managed to say while running. This strength enhancement is really putting in the work.

There is a vaccine in your combat stimulant catalog that should immunize you against their assaults. Cost is 5 points. There are also options for pills. What would you like?

“You know what, do it. Give me the injector.”

New Purchase: Parasitic Protection Immunity Booster

Points reduced to... 139

A little injector pops into my left hand and I stab it into my right arm. Kind of freaky how I got used to injecting myself with stuff now, guess adrenaline is still the best drug.

After I round a corner I open a door by bullying a security system into opening, with some assistance from Lyssa. Once inside, I close the door and sit down.

“So, any brilliant ideas for what we do next, then?”

We have 2 options: try to leave the incursion zone or group up with some PMC to get to safety, or you could do what Vanguards do best, kill some antithesis, earn some points and kill even more.

Noted, well sure, I can kill some more, but first, I need a disguise. Washed-out Corpo is not a good samurai look, and I hate to think what my boss would do when he finds out I am a samurai” Thoughts of being chained to a wall and made to shit out weapons briefly cross my mind.

Is that the reason for your intrusion into several surveillance networks and deleting their data?

“Yeah, mind giving me a hand?”

Lyssa does not have hands, but will still assist you also what would you like this disguise to look like?

“Preferably something that will cover my face and make me look like a street kid or something, someone that got lucky. Ooh, and please don’t make it too expensive”

Lyssa understands. Would you like to design something yourself or would you prefer Lyssa choose something for you?

“You chose we don’t have time to spend hours on it”

Okay, the total will come out to 100 points, is this acceptable?

“That is expensive but okay, trusting you got me this far, I don’t see why I should stop now.”

Class I Combat Garments unlocked!

Points reduced to... 89

New Purchase: Fools mask

Points reduced to... 39

As soon as I say that, a weird white plastic box appears in front of me, the size of a shoebox. As I open it, what I find inside is a white mask with nothing on it. Turning it around, I see several electronics on the inside. I slowly put it on and it hums to life. It adjusts to my face and screens turn on making me feel like I am not wearing it at all. As I look around I notice something else, I am wearing a purplish hoodie, it seems faded in some area and covered in paint spots.

“Well fuck, how does that work”

The item Lyssa got for you is the fool's mask, coming from the combat garment catalog. It projects a static and electronic light field that not only makes it look like you are wearing different clothes but also makes it feel like you are wearing it. It is powerful enough to even fool security and should not limit combat potential in any way

As she explains all of this, I pinch some of the fabric between my fingers and it feels real. It feels softer than a beat-up hoodie should be, but I am not complaining. And with that settled, it is time to get to work.

Luckily I am already in the surveillance systems of a few buildings near by, and I notice a lone model 3 on the floor above me, a perfect target for my test run. I slowly creep my way upstairs and as I open the door it makes that idea moot. The door creaks so loud that it could wake up a deaf person. All this to say that the rosebush with teeth has now spotted me and is running at me. It still creeps me out that they don’t make a sound, You would expect snarling or something. I ready my claymore and stab it right to the middle of its head as it stops moving. I am left a bit stunned.

Target Eliminated!

Reward... 10 Points

“That felt too easy”

Lyssa feels the need to remind you, that even though it has been a bit of a hack job, you do have a swordsmanship module as well as strength enhancers to help you.

“Huh, ooh, that is good, kind of feels underwhelming.”

As I look to the cameras for my next target, I spot a group of three more on the other end of the building and slowly make my way over there. This time around, I pick a route where I don’t have to open any doors, which means I can get a lot closer before they spot me.

Sadly, they still hear me before I can make it close enough for a sneak attack. As the pissed-off Cornelia’s are making their way to me, I ready myself. I try to suppress a small smirk. Despite how dangerous this is, this is so flipping cool.

When the first of the model 3s are in range, I make an arcing slash, neatly bisecting it. Then I managed to sidestep the second one. And out of pure instinct, I roll to the side trying to dodge the third one, which I successfully do. Straight into a wall.

I am now lying sideways against the wall. And the two murder plants are making their way to me. I grab a fallen chair that was lying next to me and throw it at one of them. The chair and the model 3 are both sent flying for several meters. Protectors, I love my new strength! The other is not idle and takes this as its cue to attack. I somehow managed to put my pointy stick between me and the plant and managed to impale it with its own momentum. I am now covered in plant goop. It does not smell the worst, it's like moldy cut grass, but it could be a lot better. I managed to get up before the last antithesis made it to me, and I dealt with it with a simple swipe.

Targets Eliminated!

Reward... 30 Points

I lean over putting my hands on my legs ”Fuck that was too close, Lyssa why do I feel so tired?”

Both your strength enhancement and your painkillers are about to run out, so Lyssa recommends applying another dose of both to combat any drawbacks. Then Lyssa would like to inform you that there appears to be a group of people stuck in the building across from us, 5 stories up.

“Okay, hit me with the injectors.”

New Purchase: Class I Strength Enhancer

Points reduced to... 39

New Purchase: Class I general combat Painkiller

Points reduced to... 9

“And I am poor again, that did not take long.”

Do you have any regrets about spending your points?

“Not really, I am usually not allowed to spend the money I make, so this is a new feeling.”

Two small boxes appear in front of me and I open them quickly to find the same injectors and get to work. I hope these are not addictive, that would cause all kinds of trouble.

“So how do we get to the people then?”

There are 2 possible routes. We can climb this building to floor 21 and take a sky bridge, then descend down into the 7th floor to extract them, or we can descend, walk across the road and then ascend back up into the building.

“I see, and I assume the going down route is faster?”

Correct, we should also hurry, there are some antitheses assaulting their barrier.

Well fuck guess break time is over. I quickly run down the stairs out of the building and almost into a woman. I manage to jump aside, but just as I am about to say something I notice the worms. And go into panic mode. I slash my claymore a couple of times until the thing has become chunks.

I look around to notice that I am surrounded by the freaks. I start to panic, looking around for any escape. How stupid was I to think that a sword would be enough in all of this mess. As I am looking around for a potential escape, I notice some bubbles floating, not the happy transparent soap bubbles, but blue cyan-like bubbles and as soon as one touches a zombie they collapse, and the worms stop moving. They're just dead? How?.

I look to where the bubbles are coming from. A young woman with a gas mask hanging around her neck, as well as a mess of copper pipes and chambers on her back, she is holding some kind of hose releasing these bubbles. As she comes closer, she gives me a wave.

“Well, a cute girl blowing bubbles, and it is not even my birthday!” I say, standing there in pure amazement.


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