My Wife, The Ice Queen President

Xiao Fangfang was puzzled, ‘Does such a part even exist within a cow?’

Suddenly, her brain clicked, and she was wholly stunned. Her expression suddenly shifted to a metallic-green shade.

With a thud, she slammed her bowl onto the table, and then she headed towards the washroom while covering her mouth.

Yang Xinyi had an ill premonition at the scene. She glared at Ye Xiong and asked, “Answer me truthfully, what on earth was that meat?”

“The cow’s p*nis.”

Thud!

Yang Xingyi dropped her bowl onto the table and dashed towards the washroom.

Following this, the constant sounds of vomiting could be heard coming from the washroom. It was as if the world had been torn asunder and plunged into darkness.

Ye Xiong’s heart was especially delighted upon hearing the harmonious duet of vomit.

‘You girls can be cold or mean all you want, but don’t expect me not to retaliate.’

“I scoured the entire bazaar just to obtain this cow p*nis, but I never expected it to go to waste.” Ye Xiong directed his voice at the washroom as he ecstatically declared, “I already told you girls early on, that the dish was mine. However, neither of you listened, worse still, you snatched it from me without asking. You girls deserve it. After all, you’re biting the hand that feeds you.”

Suddenly, a slew of clanging noises could be heard coming from the kitchen. When Ye Xiong turned around to look, he saw the two ladies wielding four kitchen knives and charging towards him.

“I’ll kill you, you b*stard!”

“I’ll denounce my surname of Xiao unless I turn you into mincemeat!”

‘Holy cow!’

Ye Xiong jumped off from his chair and bolted towards the exit. Even after he had exited the villa, however, the two ladies were still chasing him, and from the looks of it, even a moment’s delay would result in a river of blood.

Only after he was several dozen meters away from the villa did the girls finally stop. Ye Xiong originally intended to light up a cigarette, but he then noticed that he had not brought it along.

Not only did he forget to bring his cigarettes, but Ye Xiong had also left behind his phone and wallet. Earlier, he had found these items an obstacle to his kitchen work, and as such, he had left them in the living room. Due to this, Ye Xiong was currently, and literally, penniless.

In a situation like this, Ye Xiong would never return to reclaim his wallet, even if it cost him his life. After all, the two crazy women would have noticed that he had left behind his wallet by now, and there was a likely chance that they were currently hiding around the front gate to ambush him. Should he walk in now, he would undoubtedly be cut down.

A woman’s rage was like her menstrual cycle. It might be strikingly huge at first, but it would diminish after two days, and by the end of the week, it would basically be wiped into a clean slate. For this reason, Ye Xiong had decided not to return home in the following days, or at the very least, until Yang Xinyi’s menstrual, no, her rage had dissipated. Otherwise, it was extremely likely that Yang Xinyi would slash his head as if it was a watermelon in the middle of the night.

Without money, Ye Xiong was unable to book a hotel room; without his phone, Ye Xiong was unable to call for help.

“One blunder and my life is ruined. Does this mean that I’m going to sleep on the streets tonight?” Ye Xiong lamented.

At that instant, a scarlet vehicle appeared in front of him at high speeds. It seemed that the owner was rich.

More importantly, the owner was making a phone call while she drove, and from what he can see, she appeared to be a girl.

An idea sparked in Ye Xiong’s mind, and he tossed himself into the car’s path!

Bang!

The car sent his body hurtling away, and after rolling a few times on the ground, he stopped.

“Oh my god! I’ve hit somebody!” A sharp scream could be heard.

Ye Xiong was lying on the ground with his head slightly tilted and his eyes squinted.

“Hey, wake up! Don’t scare me like this!” The lady was so emotional that she was on the verge of tears.

Ye Xiong suddenly sat upright, but due to his fast movement and the lady bending over, he felt his face landing onto something soft.

‘They’re huge!’

‘AHH!’

“Were you faking your death? Can’t you speak before standing up?!” In a fit of rage, the girl sent a kick towards Ye Xiong.

Bang!

Ye Xiong’s upright body was pushed onto the ground once more. This time, he no longer budged after landing on the floor.

‘I showed you respect, but you rejected it. Fine, now watch as I scare the living daylights out of you.’ Ye Xiong had decided to play dead.

“Hey, wake up!” The girl shouted a few times and instantly descended into panic. She then placed her finger before Ye Xiong’s nostrils.

“Heavens, he’s not breathing. What should I do?” The girl was so scared that her words had now become incoherent. Without even caring about her hygiene any longer, she grabbed onto Ye Xiong’s face and shouted, “Wake up! I beg you! Wake up! I don’t want to go to prison! I don’t even have a driving license! Boohoo!”

Due to the shock she received, the girl was starting to bawl her eyes out.

‘Not only do you not have a license, but you’ve also crashed into someone, killing him. Hah, let’s see whether I can scare you for real this time.’

Ye Xiong had decided to continue playing dead as he did not have anywhere else to go that day. He had decided to settle his accommodations before any other matter.

“I cannot go to prison. Heck, I’d rather face death than enter that kind of place.”

The lady had smartly given Ye Xiong the cold shoulder for a few moments before walking towards him and saying in a weak voice, “I’m sorry, mister. I’ll definitely burn a lot of yuanbaos ¹ for you, so please don’t come after me!”

Ye Xiong could feel his legs suddenly being tugged and dragged away.

Through his squinted eyes, Ye Xiong saw something that sent blood rushing through his nether region.

The lady had her back hunched as she tried her best to drag him away, and from his position, Ye Xiong was having a field day.

‘What on earth did this lady eat while growing up? She isn’t that old, probably around eighteen or nineteen, but her rack is already this huge?’

Ye Xiong felt a sting from his nose as blood began to pour out from it.

“Even his nose is bleeding. He must’ve suffered internal injuries from the crash.”

The lady was so anxious that she began to circle around like ants on a hot pan. In the end, she finally gave up and whipped out her phone. She was prepared to call for help.

Sensing that this was now the right time, Ye Xiong sat back up. He was prepared to extort a large sum of money, enough to afford the fees for his accommodations that night.

“A ghost!”

The lady was just about to make the call when she saw Ye Xiong sitting back up. It had caused her to scream loudly.

“Have you ever seen such a handsome ghost before? Ye Xiong scolded.

“You’re not a ghost?” The lady cautiously inspected him and asked in a weak voice, “But you clearly weren’t breathing earlier.”

‘You’re the one who’s not breathing! I owe it all to my brilliant acting skills.’

Ye Xiong wiped away the nosebleed and thrust out his hands, and rubbed his index finger and thumb together ¹ .

“What do you want?”

“Pay up, what else?” Ye Xiong acted as if he was extremely angry.

“How much?” The lady timidly asked.

“A hundred thousand bucks.”

“A hundred thousand?” The lady leaped up in shock. “Why don’t you just rob a bank?”

“A hundred thousand is already a small amount, you know?” Ye Xiong stood up and pointed at his tattered clothes. “Just this shirt alone cost me more than a few thousand bucks, and then there’s my nosebleed, which may or may not be caused by internal damage. If I were to stay in the hospital because of this, even a hundred thousand bucks isn’t enough to cover my medical fees. The only reason I’m asking for a hundred thousand is that I can tell you’re young and naïve.”

“I can’t. A hundred thousand is too much.” The lady shook her head. “I can only give you ten thousand.”

“There’s no need to discuss any further. I’ll just go and make a call to the police and let them handle this mess.” Ye Xiong pretended to search for his phone as he laid down, “If memory serves, the penalty for hitting someone while having no license is half a year of imprisonment! Sigh, life in prison is getting harsher and harsher these days. Those women who have been imprisoned are living such pitiful lives, as they’re being treated as if they were males. Sigh, if a beautiful lady such as yourself were to enter…”

With that hoax, Ye Xiong almost caused the beautiful lady to bawl her eyes out. As of now, she bitterly responded, “The maximum I can give is eighty thousand. That’s all of my pocket money, boo hoo.”

“Fine, I’ll take it!” Ye Xiong pretended to be frustrated.

‘Heh, eighty thousand bucks in pocket money. It seems that my guess is correct. She truly is a big catch!’

Following that, the young, gorgeous lady went to the bank, withdrew eighty thousand bucks, and handed it over to Ye Xiong.

As he sifted through the thick wad of cash in his hands, Ye Xiong involuntarily rested his gaze on the gorgeous lady’s chest. He sighed, “It seems that the sayings are true, those who are big-chested are usually absent-minded.”