Path to the Apocalypse

After Cathryn calmed down from a mini panic attack over the looming eternity before her, they finally picked out a movie, and not much later the pizza arrived. The three cuddled up on the couch, Li Jing and Andrew together, while Cathryn hugged a pillow. Occasionally Andrew felt a hint of dissatisfaction from Cathryn, but everytime he glanced over, it went away. Thankfully, Li Jing was very happy cuddling with him, so he didn't particularly mind the little bit of dissatisfaction from Cathryn. Still, he figured he should probably talk to her about it later, and also about the mini spike of panic that'd gone through her when he'd decided to talk to her about her dissatisfaction.

They ended up watching a second movie, a pure comedy that time, before heading to bed. Andrew spent a few minutes saying good night to Li Jing, hoping for another invitation to spend the night cuddling, but Li Jing firmly pushed him away and sent him to his own room, though he sensed a bit of regret as she did. More emotions to wonder about. He was about to head to his own room, when he hesitated and turned towards Cathryn's instead. Might as well talk to her about it now, right? Though, he supposed he didn't actually need to go to her room to do that… eh, face to face felt more natural anyways.

Cathryn opened the door just as he was about to knock, inviting him inside. "Saw me coming, huh?" Andrew grinned.

Cathryn rolled her eyes. "You thought about me when you decided to come over. You know how that works."

"Right, right." Andrew nodded. "So, what's up? You weren't the happiest of campers back there."

Cathryn sighed, sitting on the bed. "It's nothing. I just- I'm a little jealous. Of you and Li Jing. You're just so- so- cute together, and I'm- I'm just a third wheel." Cathryn muttered sullenly.

Andrew leaned against the wall, his expression twisting slightly. "Huh… there's not much I can do about that… except maybe not rub your face in it. But then, just ditching you to go do our own thing all the time also feels wrong…" His frown deepened.

"You don't need to do anything!" Cathryn protested. "I-I'll deal with it. If it weren't for these stupid abilities, no one would even have to know! Just- just ignore it, like it should be ignored, okay?" She asked, in a slightly pleading tone.

"Cathryn, I can't-" Andrew began, before pausing for a moment. "Whoa… is this how my family feels when they talk to me about school?" He blinked a few times. "I guess it does kinda suck to watch someone you care about be unhappy. Not much you can actually do about it though, huh?"

Cathryn nodded, before pausing, her eyes widening slightly. "You- you care about me?" She asked hesitantly.

Andrew gave her a weird look. "Yeah? Why wouldn't I? I mean, we are Bonded. That right there makes us practically family. Plus, we're going to have a kid together at some point. Even if I absolutely hated you, I'd have to care about you just because of that. Not that I do hate you…" Andrew paused, considering his feelings towards Cathryn. "I know this entire situation has been… weird. We've both been out of our depth, dealing with this strange situation we've found ourselves in. It hasn't given us a lot of time to actually get to know each other. However, from the little I have gotten to know of you… I can't say I hate it. I mean, we are like polar opposites, don't get me wrong. It's just- it isn't as bad as I thought it might be. Honestly, the problem before was probably that we weren't on the same page. You kept coming to try and help me, but I wasn't dealing with what you thought I was dealing with. I didn't isolate because no one reached out to me, I isolated because I was literally too dangerous to be around. When I was being bullied, I was frustrated that I couldn't do anything about it, not that it was actually happening. Plus, I literally am a Tigermonkey! Don't you tell me they don't exist!"

Cathryn got a weird look on her face. "You remember that?"

"You don't forget someone telling you your existence is fake, Cathryn." Andrew commented with a chuckle. "Plus, we had that argument a few times that year… I got a little obsessed, I'll admit."

Cathryn giggled. "You drew them on everything."

"I was designing! I had to make sure my combined form had all the best parts of both!" Andrew explained.

Cathryn froze. "Wait, you actually turned into that?!?"

Andrew grinned, his form shifting. "Gaze upon my perfection."

Cathryn blinked a few times. "A freaking Tigermonkey."

"Technically, Tigermonkeyhuman, but yeah." Andrew shrugged as he turned back to normal. "Anyway, now that we're on the same page, your points actually make sense. They aren't just annoying. A different viewpoint from someone who actually understands what I'm going through is more helpful than I would have thought. So yes, I care about you, because I think being with you will make me a better person and- and I want that."

Cathryn stared at him for a moment, before letting out a groan and falling back on the bed. "Why did you have to be with Li Jing!?!"

Andrew frowned. "What's wrong with Jing?"

"Nothing! That's the problem! She's amazing! The two of you together are amazing! Which is why I feel like a bitch when you say something like that, and all I want to do is- is-" *kiss him like I'm trying to suck his soul out through his mouth!* The thought finished in Cathryn's head as she groaned in frustration, covering her face with her hands.

Andrew paused, blinking a few times. "Wait, you like me?" How- how the fuck had she hidden that from him?!?

Cathryn sighed, letting her hands fall to her side. "I've liked you since kindergarten."

"Bullshit!" Andrew blurted out almost instinctively. "I can literally sense emotions! All you've ever felt towards me is annoyance and frustration! See, right there! Like I just fucked up, or you were expecting me to do something and I didn't do it. Either that or you're just plain nervous around me. But then again, most people are nervous around me…"

"What do you think liking someone looks like?!? It's nervousness, annoyance, and frustration! Worrying about what you're going to say to them or what they're going to say to you, annoyed when they don't respond the way you wanted them to, and frustrated when nothing you do turns out right!" Cathryn retorted, sitting up to glare at him.

Andrew frowned. "Jing didn't do any of that! She just enjoyed talking to me, being around me. Of course, I didn't really get it until I almost died and she started talking about not being able to let me go, but still!"

Cathryn rolled her eyes. "When have we ever talked?!? Every conversation we have turns into an argument! We're literally arguing right now!"

Andrew paused. "That actually kind of speaks to my point…"

Cathryn threw her pillow at him. "Just get out of here!"

Andrew caught the pillow. "Wait, wait, no, hold on." He shook his head, taking a breath. "Okay, so, you like me. I don't really see it, but… well, I know you aren't lying to me. But what's the problem?"

Cathryn frowned. "You're with Li Jing."

"Yeah?" Andrew asked expectantly, as if she was supposed to say more.

"You're with Li Jing." Cathryn repeated, stressing each word.

"Again, yeah?" Andrew gave her a weird look. "So what? I know I explained how Bonded relationships work. This isn't exactly a problem for us."

"Andrew, it isn't that you aren't with me, it's that I have to watch you be with her!" Cathryn exclaimed, her expression twisting in pain. "I know it's selfish, I know it's unreasonable, but every time I see you with her, feel you with her, all I can think of is how I wish it was me. I-I can't imagine spending years like that, watching as you fell in love with someone else. Could you? Would you be okay with watching Li Jing fall in love with another man?"

Andrew flinched as the image went through his mind, of Li Jing curled up on the couch with someone else. Seeing that would be… difficult. He knew Li Jing would be with other guys, and that was fine by him, but having to actually watch it happen? "What do you want me to do?" Andrew asked slowly, frowning deeply. He couldn't just give up Li Jing. He wouldn't. But he also didn't want to hurt Cathryn.

"I don't know." Cathryn replied, her voice going slightly hoarse. She began shaking her head. "I shouldn't have even brought this up. I can't- you can't just spend eternity with me. You don't even know if you like me!"

Andrew shook his head. "No, we're going to figure this out. We'll talk to Li Jing. We'll do- we'll do something. I won't give up my happiness for you, but I'm not going to ask you to give up yours for me either. We're going to find a way to make this work for both of us."

*

"So, that's the situation." Andrew sighed after explaining everything to Li Jing. Cathryn sat at the table, absolutely miserable as she stared fixedly down at the table, while Li Jing just listened attentively with a serious expression. "I'm not going to give up on you, but I don't want to keep hurting Cathryn." Andrew's expression twisted. "I just don't know how to get around the Bond."

Li Jing's brow furrowed as she turned to Cathryn. "If I may ask, what exactly is the problem? Do you just not like us together?"

"No!" Cathryn immediately shook her head. "I think you two are great together! I just- it just hurts. When- when I see you two together, and I'm- I'm not, it just- it just hurts."

"Would it help if you were with someone?" Li Jing asked.

Cathryn hesitated. "Maybe? I- I'm not sure…" She thought about it for a moment, before shaking her head. "I don't know, but it wouldn't help anyway. I don't like anyone else! I don't think you two are going to put your relationship on hold until I find someone."

Andrew and Li Jing glanced at each other, before both sighing and nodding. That solution wasn't going to work. "So, you like us together, you just don't like that you aren't a part of it?" Li Jing asked. "What if you were a part of it? All three of us, together?"

Cathryn froze. "You- you'd be okay with that?"

Li Jing paused, before nodding slowly. "Yes. I know Andrew likes me. I'm secure in that. If he likes you as well, that doesn't change how he feels about me. I don't like the idea of spending less time with him, but I don't want to hurt you just so I can spend more time with Andrew. The real question is would that work for you? Andrew and I would still be together. Would that be a problem?"

Cathryn considered it. "We- we could try."

Andrew coughed. "Okay, I'm just going to step in and say, as much as this idea is very appealing, I think there's some… trickiness to it you two are kind of ignoring." He interjected. "I've considered what a situation like this would look like and I've come to the conclusion that the only way something like this works, is if all three parties love each other equally. If people start playing favorites, start wanting one person more than the other, then people start fighting, and then everyone is unhappy." Andrew paused. "I agree that this might be the only solution we can make work, but before we do anything else, you two need to work on your relationship. I'm not going to step into something that's going to blow up on me in a few years."

Both girls turned to him, narrowing their eyes. "And why were you thinking about situations like this?" Cathryn asked, Li Jing nodding in support.

Andrew flushed. "Okay, don't laugh, but… when I was younger, and less informed about the nature of the Bond, I thought, since I was a human and a Beast, I would… have to be with both. The idea kinda stuck with me and I gave it a lot of thought since then, trying to figure out how to make it work, even after I figured out that wasn't how it worked."

Cathryn frowned while Li Jing smirked. "Li Mei says if you try anything, she'll bite you."

"I wouldn't expect anything less." Andrew chuckled. Beasts weren't like humans, they were like, well, beasts. They only felt the urge to mate when they were in heat or something, and with the Bonded, their Beasts never did that. They still felt affection for each other, but it was more companionable, not sexual. "So, yeah, anyway, that's my piece. If you two can like each other, then I think we can go for it. If not… I don't know what we're going to do if not."

Cathryn glanced at Li Jing, before looking away with a flush. "I-I don't- I think I can care about Li Jing, but… I'm- I'm not a lesbian."

"Oh, that isn't what I meant." Andrew shook his head. "I think you both need to care about each other, but you don't need to want to sleep together. It just can't be a situation where you only care about me, while competing with each other. If you care about each other, then you'll want the other to be just as happy as you are, so you won't mind sharing. At least, that's how I think it would work. I don't exactly have any experience with this. But the other way absolutely wouldn't work. I know that much."

Cathryn nodded slowly in understanding. "O-okay, so… you just- you just want us to care about each other?"

"Essentially." Andrew nodded.

"That- that should be easy enough, right?" She asked, turning to Li Jing. "You're an amazing person… I already feel bad for even feeling like this because you and Andrew are obviously a great couple and if it weren't for this stupid Bond I could just let you two be happy, and-!" Cathryn paused, taking a deep breath. "I- I can't imagine taking more than you're already giving me… what I'm asking for is horrible enough."

Li Jing shook her head. "You shouldn't feel bad. You didn't ask for this. You didn't do anything wrong. You're just in a horrible situation and there isn't any good solution. If anything I'm the one being unreasonable. I'm the one who is capable of giving up, of moving on. I could live a life without Andrew-"

"Uh, as Andrew, can I say absolutely fucking not to that?" Andrew interjected. "There is no part of this where I'm willing to give you up. Not unless it's what you actually want. Which you don't. So it isn't happening."

Li Jing smiled sadly at him. "Andrew, I like- I love you, but we aren't Bound together. Separation would hurt, but it isn't impossible, and we would heal. For Cathryn, separation is impossible. She would have the wound ripped open again and again as long as we are together."

Andrew scowled. "Okay, fair, but counterpoint, no. I agree that hurting Cathryn over and over is a bad thing, but hurting each other, even if we'll heal, isn't any better. If I have to give you up because of her, even if I try not to, I'm going to resent it, and any relationship we could have had would be impossible because of it. Especially since our Bond would make hiding something like that literally impossible."

Cathryn's expression twisted as she curled in on herself. "I hate this."

Andrew nodded. "It's a shitty situation."

"We'll make it work." Li Jing stated firmly, reaching out to place a hand on Cathryn.

Andrew sighed. "It's going to take a lot of work, but yeah, we will. I won't accept anything less."

Cathryn looked up, glancing between the two of them, a small spark of hope lighting in her chest. Maybe- maybe it could work… with these two… maybe.

*

Andrew left the two girls to talk things out, heading out of the base camp to hunt. They decided they'd look at organizations tomorrow, and Andrew didn't want to interfere with the two of them figuring things out between each other. The relationship between them couldn't be about him, or it wouldn't work. They needed to be friends, sisters, or whatever on their own, regardless of him.

Andrew sighed internally. What was he even going to do with two girls? Would they be together, together? He knew it was the classic male fantasy, but mechanically, it just didn't work. It just seemed like he'd end up doing a lot of extra work for the same amount of pleasure. He wasn't about to say it was a problem, but why would you want to seek something like that out? It seemed like you could get a lot more out of it by just focusing on one girl, but if he did that, what would the other one be doing? Would they have to take turns? That seemed like a recipe for disaster. How do you make sure you're giving everyone enough attention without turning it into some sort of chore? 'Hey Honey, it's Wednesday, so it's your turn for sex.' That would just be awkward. Love needed some sort of… spontaneity. It couldn't just be scheduled.

Andrew shook his head as he felt a headache coming on. The more he thought about it, the more complicated it all felt. Love relied on being comfortable with the other person, but the very nature of sharing was un-comfortable. In order to make everything fair you had to make rules, and rules restrict, and restrictions are naturally uncomfortable. Unless maybe if you didn't care about being fair? But if you don't care about being fair, do you really care about the relationship? Or maybe you cared about the relationship more than being fair?

Andrew tore through Beasts mindlessly as these thoughts ran through his head, getting lost in the haze until the light began to fade and he stumbled back to the cabin, somewhat dreading whatever the girls had come up with. "Hey…" He greeted them as he walked in. "So… any progress?"

"Go put on clothes. I'm not talking to you while you look like that." Li Jing replied, gesturing to his carapace crotch covering.

"It's convenient!" Andrew protested, heading back towards his room. He returned a moment later, all dressed. "So, progress?"

"We've figured things out a bit." Li Jing nodded. "I'm responsible for making sure you spend time with her, while she's responsible for making sure you spend time with me. As long as we're both dedicated to that, then there shouldn't be an issue, because we'll be fighting for each other, instead of ourselves."

Andrew nodded slowly. "Okay… what's my deal then? What do I do?"

"You are going to spend tonight with Cathryn, because you two need to have an actual relationship if any of this is going to work." Li Jing replied, pushing Cathryn towards him while she flushed in embarrassment. "You two go out and have fun."

Andrew felt a hint of disappointment, before squashing it immediately. That was exactly why he had to do this. He would rather spend the night with Li Jing, but he couldn't think that way if this was going to work. He needed to spend time with Cathryn, develop their relationship, so he wanted to spend time with her as well. Ugh, this was going to take work. He paused, glancing at Cathryn as she curled in on herself again, having picked up a few of his thoughts. "Hey, come on, let's get out of here. We'll do something fun." He grabbed her hand, pulling her after him.

"N-no, you- you should stay with Li Jing. You guys can only be together here! We can work things out after!" Cathryn protested.

"Nope!" Andrew kept pulling her along.

"W-wait!" Cathryn tried to stop him, but Andrew just ignored her, picking her up as she continued to struggle, causing her to yelp.

"Let's go see what this chariot racing thing is all about!" Andrew announced excitedly, carrying Cathryn over his shoulder as he walked out of the cabin.

"You can put me down now." Cathryn grumbled after they'd walked for a bit. Andrew chuckled, putting her down gently, but keeping a grip on her hand. Cathryn flushed awkwardly, grumbling incoherently, before glancing nervously at Andrew. "Why- why are you doing this? You don't even like me."

"True, but I don't not like you either. I've never really considered liking you. Up until last night, you were just… Cathryn." Andrew explained with a shrug. "I mean, think about all our interactions up until now. We've never really gotten to know each other, we've just been dealing with all the shit we've been going through. And before all that, you were a mortal, and… well, unless you're going to be a huge asshole at some point, getting into relationships with mortals is just a bad idea. Twenty year relationship, tops, before you have to ditch them because you aren't aging. You haven't been on option for so long, I kinda just didn't think about it when it suddenly changed."

Cathryn frowned as she considered what he was saying. "So what now?"

"Now, we go watch some chariots race each other, we have fun, and we try to get… comfortable with each other." Andrew replied. "Then… we'll talk."