Re: Goblin Slayer

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***

As the Goblin Killer left the scene, I was left standing over my corpse...

I had been killed...

Thoughts of death didn't often enter my head, for there were no signs of imminent demise, but now...

I died again!

Goddamn it, again! Life isn't fair! To die of a heart attack lying in bed in my first life and to die of a clubbing in my second! Is there a trail of bad luck following me since I've died twice? Shit!

Stop! Suddenly, I'm struck by a thought. I'm thinking, which means I exist... or whatever, whatever! The main thing is that I'm thinking, thinking, thinking, after all. Does that mean I'm still alive? And... I'm younger... I guess. How long do normal goblins live? Ten to twenty years? Ah... geez, how the hell should I know! One thing that saddens me is that my human body is no longer with me! I'm now a burly, ugly goblin! I feel like I've been through a meat grinder and lost all my strength....

Glancing at my corpse with its head smashed into mush, I dismissed the thought. It's unlikely to live with such wounds, especially when there is no head at all.

Though... When I looked at myself instead of my corpse, I noticed that my body was blue, and if I looked closely, it was even slightly transparent....

Did that mean I had become a ghost? Taking a step, I stepped confidently on the ground without falling under it. Damn, but that's no reason to despair.

Hmm, could I float in the air?

Said and done. Jumping up and even jumping over my corpse, I found myself back on the ground. And that's getting annoying, you know.

Maybe I should make a mental wish then. Closing my eyes, I imagined that I was floating above the ground, and then I opened one eye and looked under my feet, they were still firmly on the ground and did not aspire to take off....

'Well, it turns out I'm some kind of wrong ghost - I can't fly!' - I felt sad about it, and sat down on my corpse. And what's important, I didn't even feel warm, that is nothing at all. At least it's comfortable, and my thoughts are not running around so much now and have settled down a bit. At the same time, I started to remember the books I had read once, with exactly the same characters as me - goblins. It's worth remembering the same RE: MONSTER, I think there was even a system there! That's a thought! Maybe I have one too, since I'm reborn after all!

'Status!' - Saying those words in my head, I wished with all my dead heart for a system to appear, but there was nothing. Only silence. I didn't despair, however, and started going through all the permissible words of command.

'Character!'

'Status window!'

'Character window!'

*Jink* - I heard the tinkling sound of a bell in my head, and the long-awaited window appeared in front of my eyes!

It's fucking done! I'm a genius! A genius!

Name.

Race - Special Goblin

Class - None

Level - 1

Experience - 0/10

Mana - 110/110

Strength - 4

Dexterity - 8

Endurance - 5

Intelligence - 11

Spirit - 5

Skills: 'I am Goblin-1', 'Appreciation-1', 'Omnivore-1'.

Settings.

Wow, what an interesting starting template! There's even a score that will probably surprise me - now to put it to the test!

To start, I closed my eyes and mentally said 'Assessment' on the 'I am a Goblin' skill

*Zing

*♪ Assessment is a success ♪

-50MP*

I felt a strange sensation, like something was missing from me... unpleasant, but bearable.

I am a goblin:

As long as there are goblins in the world, you are immortal!

Capture the body of a goblin child - 50MP (mana)

Gripping the body of a teenage goblin - 100MP.

Adult Goblin Body Grab - 150MP.

As soon as I looked at the description, I was shocked! I was simply overwhelmed with emotion! I could live again! This! This is... just... fucked up!

I can live again!

'Ha ha ha ha ha ha!'

I immediately wanted to become alive, but I restrained myself from that sentimental step in time. I need to think about my situation now, and I need to check my other skills as well. But only mana... it is not enough, and how to replenish it, I do not know....

The only thing I've come to is that I should wait for some time, and if it regenerates, then we'll experiment! I don't have to eat! Now, there's time to think.

That's a start. 'Goblin Killer. I hate him! He took me and killed me! Brutally, splattering my brains all over the floor! Fuck! It was fucking painful and unexpected! So much so that the pain disappeared instantly! But I told you I was human! I could speak human, maybe twist the words a bit, but... And he... tz! I feel ambivalent. I kind of hate him, but at the same time, I can't really be mad at him. Plus, I know his life story, and something like this makes me doubt it. If I didn't know him, I'd bust my arse, but I'd get that faggot and fuck him with a club! But I like him a bit, er, not in that way, you know, but I'd have to get revenge, just for the record! But how... that's the question.

Lure his priestess and his elf? Hmm, that's not a bad idea. Except... it would be very difficult to realise.

Let's say we poach his priestess. She seems nice, cute, blonde and naive. They're usually easy to win over if you know where to push and what to say. Here's a fact. I'm a goblin, and the Goblin Killer can smell goblins as well as a dog. I'd get killed by ordinary people just for my looks, you bloody racists! Fucking discrimination against goblins! So to realise this under the patronage of my killer will be not only impossible, but very fucking difficult! But we'll leave a note in our memory, and I'll meet you, and then we'll decide... well, a stone flew into my head by accident. Who doesn't?

No, no, no, Mr Goblin! Why such bloodthirsty thoughts? Why would I hurt an innocent child?

But the elf... here I lower my hands and bite my nails, because she is not a priestess or a support mage, but an archer or who is in charge of magical arrows that can change their trajectory in flight? She's definitely got a bow and arrow? I think it's the opposite - a rifle with homing projectiles. Or were her abilities 'slightly' embellished in the early books?

Hmm, dilemma. It sounds like nonsense, but... looking at my corpse, I can imagine more than that, and in this world, anything is possible! I won't know until I see it for myself. And it's not a good idea to get yourself worked up.

So thinking about my own thoughts, I sat there for ten minutes according to my internal clock, or less... or maybe more. Ahem.

'Character Window!'

Name -

Race - Special Goblin

Class - None

Level - 1

Experience - 0/10

Mana - 66/120

Strength - 4

Dexterity - 8

Endurance - 5

Intelligence - 12

Spirit - 5

...

Hmm, in ten minutes, six mana... Not much. STOP! Inta's up one point! Does that mean that Intelligence goes up for logical deductions and reasoning? It's a system, right, but then where's the notification?

Hmm, maybe. Except that there are no notifications, and it's a pity, because if so, I can remember my disliked algebra lessons and scary as hell teacher. Although there are settings, maybe there is something interesting there.

'Character window - settings!' - I said mentally as well.

*Zing.

A semi-transparent window appeared in front of my eyes where you could customise the notification system, display mana and experience points, and mini-map, which I did by turning them all on.

I now had a blue mana bar and white experience bar in the right corner of my view, as well as a transparent mini-map. During this time, my mana regenerated another three points, which couldn't help but make me happy and sad at the same time.

'Well, it's time to try out the skill - I am a goblin.'

Just as I used it, a window and a map appeared in front of my eyes. On the map was a huge fog of war and a single green dot - pointing most likely to me. I was also given a choice of where to appear, with no markings as to where those very nests were. I mean holy randomness.

Goblin Child:

Goblin Cave - distance 330km

Goblin Cave - distance 100km.

Goblin Cave, 40km away.

Okay, the choices aren't exactly brilliant, so which cave should I choose? - I licked my ghostly lips. I didn't think I'd be thirsty like this.