Solo For Two

Chapter 3



“Due to circumstances, I cannot go back…”

Russian land stretches vast and its borders seem endless. Even if one man crosses the border, who would notice? But the man who clearly escaped his homeland seemed never to want to return. Despite the hardships, his desire to go straight to Paris was evident.

It didn’t make sense for a poor traveler to refuse such luck, but Julian didn’t press further.

He was curious about how Karel would react to the proposition, and how much this man, whose story had begun to unravel, would reveal. But it was merely a passing interest, not an obsession for Julian.

“Feels like a long shot…”

Without showing his thoughts, Julian swiftly changed the subject.

“Okay then. Since it was just a suggestion, there’s no need to feel awkward about it… Well, let’s ask an easier question. What’s your name?”

“Sedrin, Alexander Sedrin.”

“Nice name. I’m Julian Joseph Ludwig. My real name is longer, but friends usually just call me Julian.”

“Julian.”

“Do you have a nickname? Russian names often have many, what was it…”

“Sasha.”

“Sasha, suits you.”

Then it happened. There was a loud sound of a door opening in the next room. It was Karel’s room.

Julian subtly frowned. Karel must have gotten up and rushed out of the room. The hesitant footsteps in the hallway suggested he was searching for someone who had already disappeared. Soon, the sounds faded down the stairs, and Julian noticed Sasha pale in front of him.

“Karel rushed out in a hurry. Strange. He’s not one to rush… Seems like something’s wrong. Maybe he got robbed.”

It was a muttered remark, partially deliberate in Russian. Julian noticed Sasha wasn’t looking up.

Turning abruptly cold from his earlier warm and friendly tone, Julian asked Sasha, “Did you steal something?”

Sasha only chewed on his lip without answering. Julian was sure of his guess.

The fact that Sasha didn’t jump at the opportunity to leave right away, and his inability to lie convincingly, suggested he might not be a habitual offender. But seducing travelers and stealing their belongings after a night was a common tactic.

It seemed Sasha had attempted a clumsy hustle with Karel.

Julian sighed lightly. “I’ll give it back.”

At Julian’s sigh, Sasha put the money on the table, still chewing on his lip. Julian looked down at it with indifference. He didn’t poke for the money back; the issue was that Karel had shown interest in someone who turned out to be trash.

“Take it. We’re not people who count every penny.”

“…?”

“Think of it as a lesson learned… Just take it.”

Then Julian patted his shoulder lightly. Though affectionate, his touch was firm, and Sasha lowered his head. His thin neck trembled slightly.

Ashamed of himself because of a guest. Shouldn’t have stolen in the first place.

“Leave here before my brother finds out. And I hope we never meet again.”

Julian forced Sasha to stand up.

As a parting gesture, he kissed his sweet white cheek before pushing him out of the room, where he was already crying.

***

Karel returned about an hour later, after his noisy departure.

“Perfect timing, coming back just in time for lunch.”

Checking the time, Julian casually asked Karel, who knew nothing, about the situation.

“Where have you been?” 

“…” 

“I noticed you weren’t in the room when I woke up. Did you go for a morning walk or something?” Julian, sitting with his legs crossed while unfolding the newspaper, seemed relaxed. On the other hand, Karel appeared anxious.

There was no trace of the man in any corner of the small village. Perhaps he had already left. Karel resisted the urge to rush to the train station right away. He had to persuade Julian before acting impulsively. After a brief hesitation, Karel opened his mouth.

“There’s someone I need to find.”

As Karel hesitated, unsure where to start, Julian folded the newspaper and looked at Karel intently.

“Are you talking about Sasha?”

Karel slowly lifted his head, locking eyes with Julian. Confusion, surprise, and astonishment were all mixed in Karel’s eyes.

“Sasha? Is that his name?”

“Yeah. The guy with the black hair, right? The one we ‘shared’ dinner with. Forget about him. He’s gone because he got caught trying to steal.”

“Thief…?”

“Poor my brother. It’s not like devils always look like devils. You were deceived by his appearance. He’s nothing but trash with no value.”

“Yes, sir. Have you suffered from that two-faced guy? I always knew that bastard would cause trouble someday.”

The innkeeper, passing by, spoke, and Karel looked at him with a slightly pale face.

“Do you know how many men sneak into the barn every night? I was trembling when the gentleman brought him into the room. If it hadn’t helped the business at all, I would have kicked him out long ago.”

Becoming one of the “foolish men who chased after him,” Karel still looked somewhat stunned.

What was more astonishing was that Julian showed no surprise at all. Sympathy was a habit, and curiosity was a hobby for Julian. He wasn’t this hostile when he first saw the man. Something must have happened while Karel wasn’t looking.

“How do you know that man… No, Sasha?”

“I wouldn’t say I know him. I was curious, so I invited him to the room. And he obediently followed.”

In that moment, Julian saw Karel’s eyes darken. Then he sighed inwardly. In that brief moment, Karel had been so mesmerized by Sasha that he lost his reason.

“I don’t know what happened, but forget about it. You’re not as innocent as you think. Well, given your appearance, it’s not surprising that your heart is also incomprehensible… But think of it differently. It’s good that it didn’t get more complicated.”

“But…”

“Now, stop brooding over the passing encounter. We have to move on soon.”

Julian said so and asked the innkeeper for a porter and a cart to the station. Though Karel thought he should start packing immediately, he couldn’t get up from his seat.

“He followed me to the room because he was curious. And he came along willingly.”

Why did he follow Julian?

Entangled thoughts of Julian and Sasha. Karel couldn’t control the fleeting delusions. Imagining the two naked made him feel sick inside. Karel closed his eyes and tried to shake off the dirty thoughts.

Between the impulse of wanting to grab Julian by the collar out of jealousy and the anger of wanting to blame Sasha for succumbing to him, Karel felt confused.

Regardless, there was nothing wrong with Julian’s words.

Karel walked stiffly back to the room. The white sheet that Sasha had wrapped around himself last night was crumpled on the empty bed. It felt like a dream that he had been lying there. Now he had disappeared like a ghost.

“It feels like being manipulated by a dream.”

When Karel returned to the room last night, fortunately Sasha hadn’t left and was lying quietly in the room. He wasn’t as scared as he was the first time, and the feverish state was gone.

Looking at the empty plate on the side table, Karel realized he hadn’t eaten anything since morning. The small basket of cookies he had given him when he first escorted him to the room was also empty, leaving only the shells.

“I guess he likes sweets.”

Feeling a strange sense of pride, Karel called for a servant to clear away the empty plates the man had eaten from. Throughout dinner, Sasha seemed embarrassed to have brought out the cookie basket and blushed as he watched Karel’s actions silently.

Despite knowing that he wouldn’t understand his words, Karel chattered on about this and that. It was unusual for the unsociable Karel to engage in such conversation. However, Julian didn’t laugh at Karel’s jokes at all. It was natural since they couldn’t communicate, but Karel felt a sense of awkwardness.

Instead, Sasha faintly smiled when Karel sliced the meat for him or shared his portion of dessert.

And that day, Karel experienced, for the first time in his life, a “moment of heartwarming.” The feeling of the scales, always maintaining balance, completely tilting towards the unfamiliar man in front of him.

Seeing Sasha continuously stuffing himself with cookies, too much for one person to eat alone, Karel felt both pitiful and endearing. Impulsively, he gave all the emergency funds he had to the man, fearing he might otherwise end up sleeping in a barn or starving. Plus, if Sasha were to use it, the money wouldn’t be wasted at all.

That night, Sasha was the one who first initiated physical contact with Karel. He tapped Karel’s back, then wetted his coat and lay down, showing his back. Karel was greatly bewildered by the atmosphere that seemed like he was offering himself.

“If I hadn’t expected this situation, it would have been a lie.”

Karel slowly wiped his back with his warm palm. His tense, sweaty back felt moist.

But as Karel realized something, his expression soon stiffened. His thin, long neck trembled, and his heart was beating wildly.

“He’s scared.”

Sasha was terrified. He felt ashamed and dreaded the impending time. His smooth skin on the palm was so tempting that Karel couldn’t easily let go, but his excitement subsided as soon as he realized the man’s fear.

Was he pleased with the fact that he seemed unfamiliar with opening himself up, or was he upset about being treated like a rapist?

In the inexplicable mood, Karel helped Sasha undress, spreading his gown open. Then he pulled the blanket over his chest. Sasha’s amber eyes, looking up without understanding, looked innocent, and inwardly, Karel praised himself for not easily succumbing to him.

But what if I was deceived by that innocent face?

The one who interpreted Sasha’s expression arbitrarily was himself. Or perhaps even the trembling body movements from fear were an act.

With that thought, Julian’s words pricked Karel’s heart once again.

“He said he was a thief. If that’s true, where else would I find such an easy guest?”

He gave him plenty to eat and left him with abundant blankets for the night. Karel laughed at himself.

“Sasha.”

Karel pondered the name of the man Julian had introduced. It was a name with an aura that suited the beautiful face. It was clear that he was of Russian descent.

Although Karel had no interest in the trip to St. Petersburg that Julian had suggested before, whenever he thought of that man, he felt like going. Karel couldn’t understand his own impulses.

***

Throughout the journey to St. Petersburg, the majestic planned city of the Russian Empire, the landscape outside the train window was endless snowfields.

Karel lay comfortably in the luxurious berth, watching the snowstorm fiercely hitting the window. It wasn’t bad to enjoy solitude.

Julian, Karel’s travel partner, brother, and friend, had been absent from his seat for six hours. Julian, who enjoyed socializing, would make friends by drinking whiskey or playing card games with others even inside the train.

Of course, he wasn’t only interested in expanding his network like a lively young man; he had also dragged several ladies or young women into their compartment for a private chat.

“Karel!”

Just then, Julian burst into the room, calling Karel’s name. Karel cast an indifferent glance. Julian’s cheek was slightly reddened, as if he had been drinking.

“How long are you going to lie in bed?”

“Why, do you want me to vacate the space?”

Whether Julian brought in a woman or not, Karel didn’t care, but sharing the bed was out of the question. As Karel tried to get up, Julian pulled his arm.

“I have someone to introduce to you.”

“Suddenly? Inside this train?”

Karel followed Julian out of the berth and into the lounge car. The opulent interior, filled with lavish decorations that one wouldn’t expect inside a train if not for the occasional jolt and changing scenery through the windows, was adorned with rich crimson drapes adorning the walls and ceiling as they passed through the corridor.

“So, guess who I met? The lady who married the Russian Grand Duke three years ago.”

“Hmm, sounds familiar.”

“She caused quite a stir by getting married right after debuting in Parisian society. I guess she thought it was better to become a real noble in Russia than just a name in France. You have to appreciate those who cling to the glories of the past. Anyway, I hear high society in St. Petersburg is quite dazzling… The Duchess might even invite us. How does that sound?”

“I’m not interested in those things.”

Karel asked, puzzled.

“Of course! Understandable. But still, St. Petersburg must be on a different level, right?”

Certainly, if it was about the social scene in St. Petersburg, Karel was interested too. Unlike Western Europe, where court culture was considered obsolete, in slow-modernizing Russia, there were still remnants of aristocratic culture imitating the imperial era. Thanks to that, the Russian emperors still wielded absolute power, and the lives of the idle nobles were still luxurious, despite most of the land lying fallow and the majority of the population being absolute paupers.

“This is clearly a pursuit of historical evidence.”

Julian solemnly defended. Karel followed him without a reply.

“And I was just told that she’ll invite us there. Madame, we have kept you waiting?”

Pushing open the door to the lounge car, Julian greeted a lady. A dignified woman with dark brown hair sat in a high-backed ornate chair. Karel shifted his gaze to the lady. She was definitely dressed like a member of the upper class, but she seemed too young to be called a “madame.” She seemed like she could be around the same age as his cousin’s younger sister.

“I’m honored to meet you.”

“Thank you. And you?”

The Duchess seemed to expect the typical introduction of aristocrats like “son of who’s who,” but before Karel could honestly answer about his identity or background, Julian intervened.

“If I may speak for Karel here, we have a very close relationship with his family. Karel’s father is a respected and wise man, and he’s been a long-time friend of our father. So, you see, we’ve been friends from generation to generation. Oh, more precisely, I’m his elder brother. You have no idea how this guy follows me everywhere. When I briefly attended a private school in Linz, he followed me in, and when I got fed up and ran away to Eton, he followed again. Now he’s even coming to Cambridge with me.”

Julian winked mischievously as his eyes met Karel’s.

It was Karel who was more taken aback by Julian’s exaggerated storytelling without a shave or a hiccup. But although it was an exaggeration, it wasn’t entirely false, as there was indeed a friendly relationship between their fathers, and he did skip university entrance exams. Karel started to correct the facts but stopped himself. In a way, telling the truth might be offensive to this duchess.

Had this duchess ever had any run-ins with my father’s butcher shop and had arguments over a table?

“If it’s Cambridge, which college?”

“Trinity College.”

Karel mentioned the name of the place he had almost enrolled in.

“It’s a prestigious place. My younger brother seems to want to go there too.”

The duchess’s face softened slightly. She seemed to mistake Karel for a young man from a noble family.

As a common topic emerged, the three of them were able to converse in a pleasant atmosphere. In the meantime, a variety of desserts that they couldn’t possibly finish and various fragrant teas prepared for the abstinent duchess adorned the table with its intricate and elaborate teapots. Even for Karel, who was not easily surprised, it was a bit extravagant.

After exchanging brief conversation, she stood up. Madame Rangbuoye left, leaving a message to meet again upon arriving at the Petersburg station, and returned to her compartment. The attendants, who had been standing quietly like shadows throughout, followed her and disappeared.

“You know that?”

Julian, who had been quietly watching Madame Rangbuoye leave, spoke up.

“In Russia, even the son of a duke is a duke, and the son of a count is a count. They’re obsessed with titles. They say there’s enough nobility amassed there to form a huge army, but where does all the wealth come from for so many nobles to indulge like this?”

Karel lazily leaned back in his chair and replied.

“They’re sucking the blood of peasants to satisfy their greed.”

“Just a few years ago, they had to deal with revolutions… Nobles never seem to learn.”

“That’s right. If the Romanovs were more like the Hapsburgs, who were fond of charity, things might have been different.”

Julian chuckled amusedly after hearing Karel’s words. Julian had a particular fondness for this kind of joke.

“Do you know why I bothered to introduce you to the Duchess?”

Julian’s eyes sparkled. Karel raised his eyebrows with a hint of annoyance. The dessert he had just tasted was so sweet that his tongue felt numb. He remembered someone who used to enjoy sweet food.

“Women like her never fall for blatant seduction. They’re drawn to calm, sturdy types like you, rather than flighty nobles.”

“Ridiculous. The Duchess is married, you know?”

“Karel! Spare me your innocence. Do you think there’s love between noble couples who marry for strategic reasons? I can guarantee that Madame Rangbuoye doesn’t have feelings for you. She was hesitant even when I mentioned the ball. But when I brought you along, she offered her own carriage and even invited us to her winter villa.”

Karel fell into a subtle discomfort and remained silent.

Julian had used him, that much was clear.

“I’m grateful to the Ludwig family, but I didn’t want to repay their kindness like this.”

Karel’s jokingly serious remark made Julian laugh foolishly.

***

Soon, they arrived at the Petersburg station.

Thrown onto the platform by the blizzard as they exited the train, they had to shiver in the bone-chilling wind until their carriage arrived. The entire city facing the Gulf of Finland was engulfed in a fierce sea wind.

“I thought we were going to freeze to death.”

Julian groaned as soon as they got on the carriage. Karel didn’t reply and instead brushed the snow off his hair, still trembling.

The notorious cold of Petersburg was not the kind that could be overcome by youthful vigor. Fortunately, the Duchess had graciously allowed them to use her carriage first. If they had stayed outside a little longer, their blood might have frozen solid. Julian, with his refined upbringing, kept complaining incessantly. Likewise, Karel, who had voluntarily followed Sasha, a black-haired man from Russia, out of inexplicable lingering affection, didn’t say things like “I told you to avoid the north in winter.”

The two young men from Austria continued to shiver even after getting into the carriage. It was only after their bodies thawed somewhat in the warm heat of the carriage that they began to appreciate the beautiful scenery of the city.

Built centuries ago, Russia’s planned city was grand and magnificent yet simultaneously glamorous. The streets, as straight as if drawn by a ruler, were lined with stone buildings of uniform height, and the streets, which had begun to be covered with snow, were eerily clean. Even the fallen leaves had likely been swept away by the sea wind. The strong wind even pushed the backs of people wrapped in thick clothes.

“Karel, I’m cold.”

After briefly admiring the city, Julian turned to Karel with a complaint. Karel had left the carriage window open again, causing him to start shivering.

Seeing Julian shivering, the coachman interjected.

“Are you cold? It’s especially harsh right now. It’s hard to go out without fur. “

After the coachman’s words, Julian briefly regretted choosing the north for their journey. He hadn’t even considered bringing a fur coat. The thick wool coat he was wearing now was the warmest thing he had. And it wasn’t enough to withstand Russia’s harsh cold.


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