Surviving as a Useless Bard in a Game

Chapter 17




Is this story so sensitive that I can’t even mention it to the familiar coachman?

‘…What on earth is the Mad King?’

Curiosity bubbles up, a riddle that begs to be solved soon.

“The Mad King is a hero and a lunatic.”

“Huh?”

“It may sound contradictory, but the Mad King somehow manages to embody both concepts. A hero of the past and a tyrant of the present.”

“What does that have to do with us? Even if he is a tyrant, he can’t harm a traveler passing through the Empire’s territory.”

“The Mad King’s personal strength is on par with that of the nation, and that’s the problem. The Empire currently lacks the capacity to suppress the rebel forces, so surrendering a bit of territory and granting him a title lower than the Emperor’s is all they can do. And they did just that.”

“So he’s a ‘king’ recognized by the Empire, huh?”

“Yes. The Empire is lowering its head to the rebel forces.”

No, there are still a few points I don’t understand.

I’m not one to suppress my curiosity, and it’s not my style to keep quiet and create a foolish misunderstanding.

Without hesitation, I opened my mouth.

“What does that have to do with us?”

“…That’s…”

“That person, the king, isn’t wandering around the capital or abducting random citizens to swell his ranks. He’s called the Mad King simply because he’s wreaking havoc within his own country. Am I wrong?”

It was a long statement, but there was no logical rebuttal to it.

It wouldn’t make a difference if I went straight. If I took a detour, I’d just be wasting money and travel expenses. My statement was sound from start to finish.

Skylar fell silent for a moment. Then, with hesitant eyes, she looked at me.

1. [Interrogation] (Speech Bonus)

2. [Question]

3. [Threat] (Strength + Health / 2 Bonus)

4. [Charm] (Charm Bonus)

…Choices.

What a timely moment.

With interrogation.

4. [Charm] (Charm Bonus)

Ah, please…!

It was a ‘habit of clumsiness.’ They said it only triggers once a day… Is it really going to activate arbitrarily like this? Seriously? Are you for real?

‘I’m going crazy.’

It definitely activated as soon as the choice appeared before, tossing a direct insult at the adventurer who threw a pick-up line. Surely, it wouldn’t work again, right?

[Charm – 20 or above]

[10 + 5]

The target has reached a certain level of existence.

A wizard who has awakened to one aspect.

His mental power is exceptionally high.

A member of the ‘Star Chasers.’

[Failure!]

Wait a minute, 20?

Why?

He’s just a kid.

No matter how experienced an adventurer is… Even if he’s a silver-ranked adventurer… These stats don’t make sense.

‘Certain level, exceptionally high mental power, one aspect, Star Chasers…?’

I failed the assessment, but I accidentally caught a glimpse of some information he was hiding through the status window.

Previously, I had chosen to provoke Skylar.

I think it was around 15 then. Why is it different now?

‘Is it the difference between provocation and charm?’

No matter how high the mental age, 20 is almost impossible. It means the difficulty is ‘nearly impossible.’

Such a secretive little kid.

After some time passed, the status window began its narration.

You realized that you need a big chest to attract such a kid.

Unfortunately, you lack both a big chest and a heart that can embrace everything.

Failing in charm isn’t enough; you’re on the verge of being exposed.

This is all due to your meager disposition.

‘…Hey.’

The narration from the status window felt like a subtle jab at me. No, it was definitely mocking me.

Is this guy just disappearing when needed, presenting me with strange choices, and triggering penalties at inconvenient times all on purpose?

Skylar suddenly opened her eyes sharply.

“What kind of trick did you just pull?”

“It was a mistake.”

“That mistake seemed like quite the sophisticated mental attack.”

“I’m serious; it was a misunderstanding.”

“Since the barrier of sound is still active, you might want to confess now if you’re going to.”

“…”

“Everyone has things they want to hide. However, sharing those things while traveling together can lead to good outcomes too. Especially about that curse and blessings on your body.”

The topic of conversation began to shift unfavorably for me. I was losing control.

But… did she read the charm?

Are choices a type of magic?

‘This is giving me a headache.’

My thought process felt like it was stuck somewhere and not flowing. It felt like my intelligence was dropping.

Just because my flow was blocked doesn’t mean my brain froze. I could still think. What is the best choice I can make right now? I asked myself. The answer came quickly.

Even if my intelligence drops, my mouth can still move.

That’s the purpose of the speech I picked.

“One for one.”

“Huh?”

“If you ask me for honesty, then I’ll ask you for honesty too. It’s only fair, right?”

“Okay. After I ask my question, you can ask me one. That should work for us?”

“Yep. So, what’s the question?”

“Tell me about the curse you have. Especially that strange curse that activates once a day.”

A curse.

A curse, huh?

It’s not that I completely don’t have a clue.

‘Maybe it’s referring to a negative trait I picked. The fact that it activates once a day means I might have guessed it due to narcolepsy.’

Do I have a scroll that can identify negative traits, by any chance?

They would’ve had enough time to observe me when I collapsed due to narcolepsy. It’s not a situation where lying would be appropriate. Maybe being honest is better after all.

“I become more timid, I get sickly, no matter how much I eat the nutrients don’t stock in my body, I make mistakes at crucial moments, I get tired from walking a little, I bleed from just brushing against something, and I definitely fall asleep once a day.”

“Wow… that’s a lot. I knew there was a lot, but not to this extent.”

“What do you think?”

“It’s a strange combination where the difficulty of due remedies is nearly impossible, and the materials are picky, yet it doesn’t actually cause significant harm to yourself… It seems intentional.”

“Due remedies?”

“All curses can be lifted. They just require the right materials and preparation. If the situation is unfavorable, you can even mitigate it with opposing curses. Is what’s engraved in your body permanent? Or is it temporary?”

“It should be permanent. Probably.”

“I can’t lift it then.”

“Why?”

“A permanent curse requires a staggering price as its cost. Curses are meant to kill someone in an instant or cause them to suffer and die; they don’t account for ‘leaving someone in a prolonged state of survival.’ There are not many mages willing to waste something invaluable on an opponent who’s already suffering.”

I really can’t lift it. But can I mitigate it?

‘I didn’t really expect much.’

When creating my character, I tried to avoid traits that would make responses difficult, thinking only to include those that wouldn’t affect my life too heavily.

‘Looking back now, it was a stupid move. A performance character is the rule of thumb for the first playthrough.’

At least I’m glad I included some decent positive traits.

‘With the traveler trait, there should be moments during my adventures where I can use them, right?’

It’s not a matter of ‘should’ but rather it ‘must’ happen. If I get no chances, I’ll be so frustrated I’d die. I really would die!

“…Oh.”

“What’s up?”

“I completely forgot.”

“Huh?”

“It’s my turn to ask a question, right?”

“…Right.”

Skylar waited for my words.

Honestly, seeing her look tense… it feels like the first time I’ve seen her like this.

Now that she seems adequately like a kid, I felt a slight urge to laugh. Is it because I feel relieved? Or because it’s clearer that she’s human, just like me? Who knows.

Anyhow, let’s choose a question. One that might give me an idea of Skylar’s intentions.

“You could lie, right?”

“I can’t.”

“Huh?”

“First off… I’m a wizard. Even if I can’t use magic and can only use scrolls, I’m still a wizard.”

“Wizards can’t tell lies?”

“To be precise, you have to keep transactions and contracts. Magic is permitted only for those who can truthfully state their weight on a scale.”

“That’s complicated.”

“Don’t make a face at such an analogy. It makes you look dumb.”

“…Ugh.”

Since I didn’t lie, she can’t lie either—is that how it works?

‘Difficult.’

I’ve confirmed that Skylar will answer my question truthfully, and now it’s time to ask the real question. What should I even ask?

There are plenty of curiosities, but I can only ask one.

First, let me organize a few points of doubt.

The most important ones are…

Why is Skylar traveling with me? Why did she help me? How much does she know about me? What exactly are you after through me?

‘And why are you trying to avoid the Mad King?’

To be honest, I want to ask about the meaning of the words that appeared after I failed the charm option earlier.

But if a person with no basic common knowledge of this world suddenly asks such a question, it would only raise suspicion.

Alright. I’ve made up my mind.

“Why are you trying to avoid the Mad King? I mean… I’m curious why you’re trying to avoid his lands and taking a wide detour to Regan.”

“Oh.”

“Huh?”

“Have you been pretending to be a fool this whole time?”

“What do you mean by that?”

“There’s no way that someone who grimaces at simple analogies could ask such a piercing question.”

“You’re being too harsh.”

“Hah… Anyway, since you asked a question, I’ll answer. My answer is—”

Skylar was about to respond.

And then, the barrier shattered.

Transparent glass shards scattered everywhere, and the sound outside poured in like thunder and lightning. It was a shock made entirely of raw information.

The jolting wagon stopped abruptly.

It didn’t halt due to hitting a stone or losing a wheel. The coachman intended to stop the horses.

‘…This feels off.’

The air was prickly, sharp. Just a little movement felt like it would prick my skin. I sensed multiple human presences outside.

Skylar and I gazed outside, both tense.


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