The Best Director

Chapter 326: Chapter 326: Ridiculously Funny!

“Tell him our IQs!”

After the commercial break, NBC’s premiere of “The Big Bang Theory” continued, and Nancy Tellem of CBS was looking increasingly somber. Yet, oddly enough, she would occasionally shake her head and laugh out loud, like just now when Leonard “used his brain” to open the building door. She also realized that when those geeky oddballs “got moving,” they could achieve a terrifyinly hilarious effect. The audience’s almost non-stop, increasingly louder laughter seemed to confirm this.

In the shower room, Penny successfully entrusted Leonard to go to her ex-boyfriend’s place to retrieve a television set. Even though his car was broken, Leonard still readily agreed to help, and Sheldon also agreed because he was disturbed by Howard speaking six languages to hit on women and couldn’t watch the “ST: USS Enterprise” Season 3 commentary track version. Leonard also offered him a treasured “Batman” comic book. What they didn’t anticipate was that Penny’s ex was a hulking man brimming with muscles. Upon learning their intention…

“Hahaha!!” On the television screen, a combined IQ of 360 Sheldon and Leonard walked out of the building in only underwear, with Sheldon in white briefs and Leonard in floral patterned boxer shorts. Clearly, they had been humiliated by the muscular man who took away their wallets and pants, leaving them just enough money to get home. Evelyn laughed until she nearly had a fit, finally understanding why they ended up riding the bus in underwear! She felt the calories she lost from laughing tonight surpassed all the calories lost watching “The Eight Simple Rules” in one season—this was not “Friends”! This was the one and only “The Big Bang Theory”!

“Hahaha! It’s those two dummies again.” The bus arrived, and the doors opened. Zack Galifianakis, in a cameo as the chubby bus driver, made his entrance again. Seeing the two, his bearded chubby face beamed with a joyful smile, and his signature laugh instantly provoked another wave of laughter from the audience. This time, without any argument, both of them walked onto the bus, with Sheldon’s mouth tightly closed, displaying an expression more tormented than death itself.

Through the front camera angle and the windshield, the interior of the bus and the streetscape on both sides were clearly visible. Of course, all of this was still recorded in the studio, and what looked like real scenery was just projection technology.

“No guns, not terrorists.” As the two got on the bus, the chubby driver’s serious comment had the audience in stitches once again, with several extra passengers on the bus shooting quick glances at them. The chubby driver started the bus and said with a somber and indignant tone, “I’m so sorry. Maybe since 9/11, everyone has become neurotic. Thank you so much, Bin Laden!” The live audience’s laughter burst out once more.

Countless viewers in front of their TV screens couldn’t help but applaud and laugh! Even Nancy Tellem couldn’t help but laugh at the use of sensitive topics like terrorists, 9/11, and Bin Laden as punchlines, especially in the premiere. But it wasn’t the young man’s first time doing this, as it was merely a classic line revived from Galifianakis in “The Hangover”. It had been three years since the 9/11 incident, and the mood of mourning had just passed. It was time to be merry, and everyone knew it was a form of self-mockery by Americans, not actual gratitude toward Bin Laden. Just look at the effect on the scene.

Nancy Tellem sighed once again. These few lines also served to satirically amplify the humor at Sheldon and Leonard’s expense. Firstly, saying that the two men in only underwear “have no GUN” implies they’re not really men. Coupled with their recent failure to retrieve the television and being robbed by the muscular man, it highlighted their “dumb” nature. The images of weird nerds and terrorists both suggest abnormal minds, and riding the bus in underwear indeed looks “neurotic”. However, post-9/11, when everyone became sensitive and odd, they seemed “normal”, thus the thanks to Bin Laden.

One must admit, it was a clever move, and Zack Galifianakis’s cameo was used to the fullest! Kevin Reilly, the President of NBC Entertainment, laughed heartily in satisfaction. He knew that tonight there would be a large number of young viewers coming because of the miraculous Yang, all of whom were fans of “The Hangover” and “Juno”. These memorable cameo scenes would spark in them an increased interest and affinity for “The Big Bang Theory” and then become regular viewers; as for the 50 and 60-year-olds, who cares? 18-49!

The CEOs and the “The Big Bang Theory” team were not wrong in their thoughts as countless young fans of “The Hangover” were dying from laughter at the chubby man’s antics, but soon they naturally burst out into thunderous laughter: “Haha!”

“Here’s a reminder for you.” The streetscapes on both sides were moving backward as the chubby driver spoke while driving, “Don’t sit on the third-row left seat, I saw someone throw up on it, a vegetarian, because I didn’t smell any meat.” As soon as he mentioned someone had thrown up on the bus, Sheldon dramatically exclaimed in horror, “Oh DEAR-GOD!” right next to the third-row left seat! He clung to the handrail and screamed at the top of his lungs, “Stop the bus, oh BOY, oh BOY!” As the bus kept moving, Leonard remained expressionless, while Sheldon’s pained “oh BOY” began to fade away…

“Hahaha!” Rachel laughed with her mouth wide open, unapologetically resembling the “New Julia Roberts” as dubbed by a magazine, slapping the sofa and pointing at the TV screen, “Oh boy! Oh my God!” Natalie, fuming, swung her fists in the air. Another joke about vegetarians! It seemed that he was full-on intent on not leaving her be today! How could it be so funny… She slapped her own cheek, reminding herself to shout, “Hey, you’re a vegetarian! That damn fatty!”…

“This is one of my favorite places to trade after a hunt, the beer here is just awesome.” Meanwhile, in the apartment, Howard was inviting Penny to join the world of online gaming, and any seasoned gamer could recognize “EverQuest” on the laptop’s screen, featuring a witch doctor accompanied by a summoned pet wolf. Standing up, Penny smiled and said, “Wow, what a cute dog.” Howard replied with a warm smile, “Yes, it’s been with me since I was level 34, its name is Charlie.”

Laughter erupted once again as everyone was just laughing at Howard’s geeky behavior, but Natalie knew she had just been KO’d again. Her Yorkshire terrier was named Charlie! She yelled in shock, “Oh, FUCK! That bitch! That’s too evil, hahaha!”

Leonard and Sheldon returned, and their miserable experiences were rewarded with a hug from Penny. Sheldon failed to dodge in time, while Leonard reveled, “Our kids would be both smart and beautiful.” Sheldon, true to his nature, retorted sarcastically, “The imagination goes without saying.” The laughter spiked again, accompanied by applause and cheers. Feeling guilty, Penny decided to take them out for dinner. However, when they gathered downstairs, Sheldon pointed out the many safety hazards of Penny’s car. But Leonard’s comment, “You can take the bus,” made Sheldon hastily climb inside the car.

“I guess we’re gonna have to explain everything to this girl from now on.” After a discussion about what to eat and Sheldon’s veto of Thai food for being “nutrient excessive” like Indian food, Howard suggested going to a sushi place where they could also do karaoke. He started singing Rascal Flatts’ love song with an air of great self-satisfaction, “BABY, don’t get too entranced by me, BABY…” The first episode ended amid laughter and the crooning love song.

“Haha! Howard definitely won’t be able to get Penny, he won’t get a wife!” Jessica hugged Wang Yang’s arm sweetly, she could tell that the Jewish character was Natalie. Although the fun and interesting parts dominated, and Sheldon, tall and from Texas with the sign of Taurus, was a main character, Jessica couldn’t help but tease Howard for a bit out of jealousy. Wang Yang just shrugged and laughed, “He and Penny of course don’t stand a chance, but the fact is he’ll eventually get a wife, a shy, pretty, and understanding Catholic girl.” Jessica, smiling, suddenly froze, then hit him while laughing, “NO-WAY! You’re joking, right?”

As Wang Yang took her relentless blows, he shook his head seriously, “No, the production team has already decided it. Howard’s going to be the first one getting married, haha! Full of conflict and fun, isn’t it?” Seeing he wasn’t lying and could certainly pull it off, a Jewish man marrying a Catholic girl, Natalie… Jessica’s eyes were full of laughter as she turned her head and playfully grumbled, “What am I supposed to say to you! I am very angry right now!” Wang Yang hugged her and laughed reassuringly, “COME ON… I’ll sing! BABY, don’t get too entranced by me…”

While NBC was airing commercials and Wang Yang was appeasing his wife, the audience, their facial muscles aching from laughter, took the opportunity to get up and move around, using the restroom if needed and getting water, preparing for the upcoming second half. Many youngsters and teenagers picked up their phones to inform friends who weren’t interested before or to chat. A white girl from Chicago still had a smile on her face, “You can still catch up if you start watching now, it’s just too funny!” A geeky boy in New York urged his buddy to watch, “Stop dallying! It’s a hundred percent for us, wow, unbelievable!”…

“Is it really that good?” Receiving his friend’s short and clear text, “Without watching it, you’ll be completely out of the loop at school!!” a high school boy in Los Angeles grabbed the remote and switched from CBS to NBC. “There are too many fresh and funny terms, damn it! Stop watching ‘Survivor’! The second episode even has an amazing guest appearance by Yang!” A high school girl in San Francisco was similarly pushing her friend; she didn’t want to go to school the next day and have nobody to talk to about “The Big Bang Theory”. But this worry seemed superfluous, as all over, eager young people were rushing to say, “The tall one is Sheldon with germophobia…. Enough said, the second episode is starting!”

Whether it was new viewers or those continuing to enjoy, the second episode brought even more insane laughter, non-stop until the light-hearted and lively theme song gave everyone a chance to rest, “Our-whole-universe-was-in-a-hot-dense-state… It-all-started-with-the-Big-BANG!”

The second episode still revolved mainly around Penny’s move-in, with the comic book shop and the CIT cafeteria briefly making their appearances onscreen, successfully piquing the viewers’ interest. Amid waves of laughter, the characters, at the peak of maturity, collided hilariously, shaking out bags of their characteristics and quirks, offering up fresh and tasty comedic fruits. Sheldon and Leonard, tasked by Penny to move her furniture upstairs: “Good, now we’ve created an incline, reducing the pull by the sine of the stair angle, which is about 30 degrees, cutting it nearly in half.” However, when Sheldon discovered Penny’s apartment to be extremely messy, his compulsive neat-freak tendencies kicked in, leading him to break into her apartment in the middle of the night to tidy up the living room while Penny slept…

“Sheldon? Sheldon?” On the TV screen, Leonard got out of bed to investigate a noise in the middle of the night and found his way into the dimly lit living room, “Sheldon? Is anyone there?” clutching a green lightsaber of Luke Skywalker he’d just bought that morning at the comic book shop, moving with cautious and alert steps. The audience roared with laughter, especially the “Star Wars” fans who simply couldn’t stop. The question was, how many people hadn’t seen or didn’t know “Star Wars”?

These two episodes were stuffed with geek elements, and the most prominent and numerous were undoubtedly “Star Wars” and “Star Trek,” it looked like the promised guest appearance by Yang in the previews also belonged to “SW”; and of course, there were also mentions of movies and comics like “Green Lantern,” “The Lord of the Rings,” “Superman,” and so on.

“Haha!” Despite being the actors who had performed the scene and knowing every detail, Johnny Galecki, Kaley Cuoco, and the other main actors who were watching still couldn’t stop laughing. The audience was even more exaggerated, with many literally bursting into tears of laughter. Indeed, it was too funny—Sheldon and Leonard’s bass voices sounded so goofy no matter what they said, and Penny, waking up furious. Leonard’s sarcastic signs, Sheldon being forced to go apologize: “Penny, Penny…” tap tap, he knocked twice, and Penny opened the door, only for Sheldon to continue knocking on it: “Penny.”

The unique way he knocked elicited another round of laughter. The increasingly disastrous attempts at apologizing were joyful. Nonetheless, after receiving a heartfelt apology from Leonard, Penny forgave them, and Leonard even got a peck on the cheek, which made him dizzy with delight, causing him to bump into the closed door. To make amends, the scientists volunteered to help Penny assemble her TV cabinet. However, all four of them thought the Swedish TV cabinet “lacked imagination” and needed a major makeover. Penny repeatedly told them not to bother, but Howard, in a husbandly tone, said, “Just a moment, sweetheart, the men are working here,” which again had everyone in stitches.

“Hahaha!” After the four of them busied themselves discussing the renovation plan and left to gather the necessary materials, Penny helplessly said, “Well, this place looks pretty great,” and with a cut to the next shot, the revamped TV cabinet was ready. It was super luxurious and weird and did not match the surrounding decor at all. The varying expressions on the five people’s faces sent the audience into another fit of laughter. When “science” and “geekiness” left the script and came to life, the result was surprisingly good!

After a busy day, it was time for dinner. This time they went to a Chinese restaurant they often visited. Finally, in the last part of the second episode, the eagerly awaited cameo character appeared!

The dashing Yang Wang, Bradley Cooper, and the genteel Ed Helms were dining and chatting at a table. Penny, stunned, widened her eyes and let out a half-choked “eek,” petrified. Numerous female fans also screamed in support. Rachel, full of enthusiasm, said, “If you don’t act well, you’ll have to compensate me for the TV!” Natalie let out a snort with a smile, “I’m looking forward to seeing how you’ll KO me this time!” Jessica shouted excitedly, “I want to make a cameo too, I want to make a cameo!”…

“Hahahaha!” The burst of laughter wasn’t due to the dialogue but because of Penny’s daydream. Following a crazy burst of camera flashes, the TV screen featured Penny, the most stunning figure in the second episode at the time, standing on a red-carpeted stage in a beautiful and elegant white evening gown, holding an Oscar trophy and laughing wildly with her head thrown back: “Haha, thank you, thank you! Thank you——” The camera cut back to the scene in the Chinese restaurant, where Penny was still standing petrified, but her clothes and look had already changed into that of her fantasy.

However, in the eyes of others, this surreal change was not apparent, yet it was enough to leave the audience roaring with laughter. Leonard and Howard were also very nervous, not any better than Penny, who was not even a real actress, after all, that was the magical Wang Yang! “How should we start a conversation?” Before they had time to discuss, Sheldon, who already harbored dissatisfaction towards the magical Wang Yang, arrogantly walked over, “Excuse me, I am Doctor Sheldon Cooper.” Wang Yang and his friends looked up, and Sheldon’s face turned very serious, “Mr. Wang, I must say, your movie has some very serious problems.”

“In ‘District 9,’ when the spaceship started up to go home at the end, the sound waves it emitted shattered all the glass in Los Angeles and caused cracks, and the seawater in Santa Monica was also agitated. This indicates that the shattering of the glass was not because of resonant frequency, but rather a high-energy shock wave. Yet the onlookers’ eardrums were totally fine, they didn’t even cover their ears!…”

Sheldon’s didactic, rapid monologue, along with Wang Yang’s bewildered and innocent expression, once again provoked peals of laughter from the audience, while Leonard and Howard anxiously exchanged worried glances in silence, spiking the laughter once more. After Sheldon finished discussing the sound wave issue without pausing for breath, Wang Yang looked at Bradley Cooper in confusion, “Sweetheart, who is this? Your brother?” Bradley Cooper and Ed Helms looked amusedly at Sheldon, who was standing proudly, and the handsome Cooper said with a smile, “Yes, I’m Doctor Bradley Cooper.”

“I am Doctor Ed Helms,” Ed Helms also said with a wide grin, showing his teeth, and by then, the young audience, who were in fits of laughter, naturally knew that “Stu” in ‘The Hangover’ was a dentist who even pulled out his own tooth. The camera again focused on the charming Bradley, who raised his hand and laughed, “Don’t joke, you’re just a dentist.” Sheldon looked from side to side with his eyes, gradually growing angry, “Excuse me, gentlemen! I am a holder of a PhD in theoretical physics, and the average age of dental graduates in America is 28 years old, and from 1901 to 2003…” Before he could finish, the three couldn’t contain themselves and burst out in ‘unscrupulous’ laughter. Wang Yang said with a smile, “Doctor Cooper, have you ever considered that it might be a unique sound wave technology of aliens, meant to promote glass sales, but not to kill?”

“Ha!” Amidst the audience’s laughter, Sheldon Cooper was very disdainful. He continued to speak rapidly, wanting to debate, but the arrogant and venomous response from the magical Wang Yang left Sheldon speechless, and he grew increasingly frustrated, beginning to pick on other flaws in Wang Yang’s movies. The ease at which one recovers from a hangover, like the clear-headed and agile main characters in ‘The Hangover,’ is simply not possible! “Have you ever been drunk? Oh heavens, he’s never drunk! Doctor Cooper, sometimes science can deceive.” Sheldon exploded with righteous indignation, “You shouldn’t have let Padmé Amidala play such a childish game of poker with a comically huge belly!”

In the televisions of countless homes, Wang Yang raised his eyebrows, smirked, and shrugged, “At least I didn’t make her have twins.”

“Hahaha!” “Wahaha!” The live audience went mad, and the laughter, applause, and cheers broke the night’s sound barrier. In the ‘Star Wars’ series, Natalie Portman’s character Padmé Amidala did indeed bear a set of twins for Anakin Skywalker, namely Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia; while in ‘Juno,’ Juno only had one baby. The ambiguous use of language by the magical Wang Yang, along with his facial expressions and gestures, multiplied the comedic effect several times over.

The live audience went crazy with laughter, and the TV viewers weren’t far behind. Fans of “Star Wars” and “Juno” were cracking up; Rachel couldn’t help but clap and cheer, “Hahaha!” Seeing him act so cocky and punchable, no need to pay for the TV now! “This jerk! I can’t believe it!” Once again totally KO’d, Natalie felt as if she had been battered everywhere, laughing herself to death, “Oh SHIT! How many tens of thousands of viewers are there?! This jerk!” Jessica laughed heartily while mercilessly pounding on Wang Yang beside her: “You’re dead! I’m really angry now!” Wang Yang admitted guilt with a laugh, covering his head…

“Hahaha!” But the excitement didn’t stop there. On the TV screen, the three superstars stood up to leave, and just as Leonard’s group also started to move, Sheldon had just finished scolding, “Of course, compared to Anakin Skywalker, you’re a single-cell organism!” Wang Yang suddenly raised his palms towards him mid-air, and Sheldon, horrified and puzzled, urgently asked, “What’s this? Kung Fu?” Wang Yang declared loudly, “No! This is a Force attack, I’m choking your neck right now!”

The insane laughter was unstoppable, “The Big Bang Theory” was certainly not a sci-fi drama, but Sheldon now clutched at his own neck, his expression of pain and horror suggesting that he truly felt the mysterious Yang’s Force choke, barely able to stand. Leonard, Howard, and the others cried out urgently, “Let him go, let him go!”

“OK.” Wang Yang, Bradley Cooper, and the others walked away with a “Heaven knows what that was about!” smile; Sheldon instantly seemed to nearly collapse as he was let go, Leonard and the others hurried to support him, anxiously inquiring, “Sheldon, are you okay?” Sheldon was gasping heavily for air.

Amidst the laughter, the camera cut, and Penny had changed back into her normal clothes, but the mysterious Yang was nowhere to be seen in the cafe! Penny, shocked, gasped and rushed over, “Where’s Cooper? Where’s the mysterious Yang!!!” Leonard looked at her helplessly, “If you mean Bradley Cooper, they just left; but there’s still one here.” Sheldon, still being propped up, swore as he angrily shouted, “Yang Wang is officially listed as Sheldon Cooper’s ‘eternal enemy No. 7’!!”

“Hahaha!” The audience, already fond of the character Sheldon, couldn’t help but be intrigued, eternal enemy No. 7!? Who were the first six? Inside the TV screen, Penny seemed about to faint upon hearing the dreadful news: “Oh…” Leonard, Howard, and Raj all reflexively rushed to catch her, while Sheldon, yet to recover, collapsed onto the restaurant floor with an “Oh…”

In a burst of laughter, “The Big Bang Theory” ended its first season premiere, one hour and two episodes full of limitless joy, leaving countless viewers endlessly amused, thrilled, and breaking into laughter just thinking about it. For many fans, this was definitely a sleepless night, thinking about watching “The Big Bang Theory” every Thursday evening, recalling the exciting teaser from the third episode, their adrenaline was soaring! Yet considering the weekly episode schedule, it could also be a bit depressing; even more concerning for the geek community was that the show indeed was much more fun than “Freaks and Geeks,” but what if… the ratings aren’t good enough and it gets cut?!

There’s no reason for the ratings to be bad! The mysterious Yang hasn’t been modest before, he just spoke the truth, “It can kill with laughter!” So with “The Big Bang Theory”, forget modesty! The ratings will definitely be high!! This was the unanimous consensus reached in Evelyn’s dorm room, as well as the simultaneous thoughts of many others.

Thinking about the situation CBS will face, Nancy Tellem’s face turned dark. Could “TBBT” fail in its premiere ratings? The quality of the show is very, very high, and they even invited the super-popular “The Hangover” trio for a cameo. Of course, bringing in their Wang Yang for NBC was a piece of cake, and with the young man himself on board to boost ratings and retain the first wave of viewers… and NBC had spared no expense in promotion, so this show really was…

“I just need 18 million viewers, a 9 point rating in the 18-49 demographic will do! I’m not greedy, I’m not greedy…” Kevin Reilly prayed silently, his smirking lips as if stealing a smile.

“Are you going to sleep?” After watching “The Big Bang Theory” and an episode of CBS’s “CSI”, it was ten o’clock, bedtime! Jessica, true to her style these past few days, turned around and clung to the back of the sofa, Wang Yang raised his palms towards her, menacingly said, “If you don’t behave, I’ll have to hit you with the Force!” Jessica defiantly replied, “You better use Kung Fu!” Wang Yang, helpless, scratched his head and looked towards Danny that had wandered over, yelled with his palms ready, “If you don’t behave, I’m going to hit Danny with the Force!”

Danny tilted his ears in confusion. What?