The Priest Wants to Retire

〈 Chapter 84 〉 Threat

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It’s not that rare to bump into rascals in this system.

Unlike a warm country where a bag left at a store is still sitting pretty by the next morning, you can never be too sure about the safety of the bag you’re holding – that’s the average security consciousness in this world.

Of course, in the capital city of a country, they tend to secure the main streets a bit more, but those dark shadowy corners that the public can’t easily see? Yeah, that’s a different story.

So for those living in this system, it would be fair to say that finding a way to protect themselves from the rascals they might encounter at any moment is absolutely essential.

As for me, the favorite method I employed was simple: avoid places where they might be, or if I ran into them, just hand over all the valuables I had and get on with my day.

Dealing with such thugs while already overwhelmed and tired from mundane tasks felt pretty annoying.

Also, if I tried to chase them off clumsily, it wouldn’t be long before I got some troublesome retaliation.

Not out of fear, but simply because it’s a hassle, I, inherently lazy, have always tried to steer clear of situations where I might cross paths with them.

To be honest, I was a little scared too.

My comrades could sense my half-hearted reactions were quite frustrating, and I sometimes felt a bit suffocated by my own timid demeanor.

Yet, as I got used to it, every time I handed over valuables to those rascals, I felt a bit like a grandma giving out candies to kids, which made me oddly proud.

Therefore, encountering a situation like this has been extremely rare for me.

There was no proper escape route, and clearly, any persuasion wouldn’t work in an unsolvable situation.

And then it happened.

An unpleasant choice that I usually ignored suddenly began to flicker in my mind.

”····”

”Oh! What’s up? Want to try?”

I stood in front of the rascals, pointing at the robber who had become a stuffed doll under the Saint’s protection.

Having faced monsters that rip people apart with my bare body, pushing them away from here was as easy as pie compared to dealing with those sheltered little flowers who’ve never even seen hell.

The trouble was, I was in a situation where I needed to avoid any major commotion, and hand-to-hand combat wasn’t exactly my strong suit.

While it was definitely a benefit that my body had naturally toughened up from enduring the hell of a dungeon, quietly suppressing such a number of rascals with the strength I had plus absolutely no technique or talent was just as exhausting as picking up tofu with chopsticks.

Right now, in my eyes, they looked like walking tofu.

Furry tofu. Tattooed tofu. Black-skinned tofu. No wait, is that acorn jelly?

”If you’re going to talk, why not say something back? Or are you so busy listening to the divine words that you don’t want to chat with us? Is that it?”

It was right then.

The tattooed tofu who seemed to lead the group of rascals suddenly closed in on me.

I realized it instinctively.

Right now.

Having been an adventurer representing physical work for years, I had dealt with countless insignificant incidents in various gatherings where quarrels could arise at any moment.

So by the time our party became well-established, there were clear procedures to snuff out the seeds of conflict beforehand, just like a fire alarm manual.

The most prominent method was, of course, ‘Threat.’

Creating a ruckus by smashing something relatively solid in the surroundings or emitting an intimidating aura to crush the will of the opposition.

In our party, Bigtim and Apis generally took on those roles.

The Hero, perhaps due to their natural charisma, had never been easily provoked by anyone, no matter how grand they were.

In contrast, Dawna’s fierce desire to test her newly developed magic glimmered in her shadowy eyes, keeping not just people but also monsters from approaching her.

But even with our party’s perfect defenses, there were cracks.

Yep, that was me.

With an inherently gentle appearance and a physique that looked like it couldn’t even kill a bug, it was only natural for the eyes of the hyenas looking for trouble to converge on me, especially since I was wearing a priest’s robe.

Unable to contain herself, Apis occasionally taught me how to threaten opponents, but we soon realized something.

I had an utterly destructive lack of talent for intimidating others.

It wasn’t rare for pieces of items I smashed to hit my face.

The day I shouted a roar after gathering all my strength at my dantian, only to hear the innocent observation from the Hero saying, “Even a three-year-old would do better than this!” was a moment I was honestly quite hurt.

That’s what Apis had said to me, after all.

So I just cleaned my hands of it.

If a quarrel broke out, I let it be, and when I sensed any signs of a fight, I’d throw away my pride and run.

There were times when the Hero disappeared with the ones trying to provoke me into some dark corner, but most of the time, it all passed by peacefully.

Yet, I felt it in my gut.

This was the moment to unleash the beast within me that I had sealed away.

”Hey? Are you deaf?”

As the menacing man closed in on me, crinkling his expression and intending to swing a fist, the Saint made her move like a puppet with twisted joints, attempting to approach him.

I hurriedly blocked her wild charge with one arm while grabbing the man’s fierce wrist with the other.

”Ohh~!”

Thud.

Surprisingly pleased with my bold move, the man suddenly uttered impressed words filled with a smile.

”Boss! It seems we really messed up this time!”

”Hahaha!”

At the sound of the large man being called ‘Boss’ laughing heartily, even those standing behind him began to chuckle.

Did they even realize that their comrade had just almost bit the dust a moment ago?

In that narrow alley, filled with mocking laughter echoing non-stop, the emotions I felt were a mix of self-deprecation about my treatment and pity towards them.

”Are you trying to get yourself killed─!”

It was right after that.

As if to shake off my grip on his arm, the man suddenly bellowed, trying to drive his knee into my abdomen just then.

Whoosh─!

”Huh?”

Just at that moment, my arm holding his came around in a quick arc, and the man realized the cold, hard ground awaited him as a destination.

Thud!

His body crashed onto the ground like a fish freshly pulled from the water.

”Cough, cough!”

”What!”

As he struggled to catch his breath like a thwarted fish, the frozen expressions of the rascals watching turned into disbelief as they stared at me.

Then, placing my foot lightly on the man sprawled out on the ground, I confidently met their panicked gazes.

They could be seen swallowing hard, stepping back nervously, faces fully gripped by fear.

I was achieving more than expected.

As I murmured a quiet compliment in my heart, I took a brief look at the man at my feet.

I had been worried he might suffer a fatal injury from a bad bump. Seeing that he wasn’t coughing out blood, and given the state of his limbs, it seemed he might have a few cracked bones but was still okay.

Phew.

While I was relieved that the first button had been neatly fastened, alongside the indescribable sense of achievement emerged a twinge of complexity.

It was great that one of the secret plans Apis had pointed out, to take down a suitable opponent loudly as an example to demoralize the others, had worked successfully.

However, even if I was left with no other options, hitting a person who was not a monster never felt good.

The uncomfortable sensation settling in my hands. The sticky feeling clinging to my consciousness. All of it was unpleasant and soured my mood.

I realized again; I really had no aptitude for hitting people.

”Y-You! Wh-What are you!”

”T-This guy, could he be an awakened one!?”

”W-What do we do, Boss!?”

In a panic, the subordinate pushed the boss toward me just as our eyes met.

I thought about casually greeting them, but that wasn’t going to work.

After all, threats are all about the atmosphere and the flow of the moment.

While verbally threatening the opponent could be an effective means, it clearly didn’t apply to someone like me, who was all fidgety about every little movement.

‘Once you knock one down, shut your mouth until they back off on their own. The moment you open your mouth, you just become bait.’

Every word was spot on.

Since Apis was the best when it came to rough talk, I could never bring myself to counter her words, not even for a moment.

In fact, in the past, I had seen a similar situation.

‘P-Please don’t do that next time····!’

Just a meek remark from me had turned a suddenly tense atmosphere into a complete reversal.

To maintain the bleak atmosphere, it was best for me to stay quiet.

But since I couldn’t convey my intentions to them without speaking, I decided to express my will through action instead.

Swish.

I raised my index finger, cautiously bringing it to my lips and smiled shyly.

”Hii, hiiiik!”

It seemed obvious how they would interpret this meaningfully awkward gesture.

Naturally, fear has a knack for inflating the perception of the opponent’s capabilities.

I figured this should suffice. If anything, it might have been a bit too much.

As I thought the situation had more or less settled and was about to pick up the man writhing on the floor to throw him at them…

”Huh?”

In the process of bending down to grab the man, I accidentally knocked into something behind me.

Bam.

When I realized that dull sound was a nameless robber who had briefly become a stuffed toy by the Saint, the horrific scene unfolded right after he slammed into the ground, shattered into pieces.

”Hey, that’s····. D-Deroy. No, wait····. Hey? He was a newbie just recently····.”

One of the men pointed at the scattered pieces, suddenly halting his formerly animated chatter, as if he had come to some grim realization.

”Huh? Huh, huh?”

The rascals’ once fearful gazes quickly transformed into distinct terror directed towards something abnormal.

”W-Wait a minute. This is a misunderstanding…”

”Ahhhhhhhh─!!!”

Before any words could escape my mouth to try to calm the situation, they were already bolting away like their lives depended on it, fading beyond my guarded voice.

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