The Snow Queen

Lord Wolfscott glanced over at me.“You’ve already met, but let me formally introduce you. This is Ray Arisa. Arisa, this is Director Guiger, Snake. Go ahead and greet each other.”“Nice to meet you.”“Nice to meet you as well.”We exchanged a brief handshake. His hand was also covered in thick hair. If this guy were really a director at Guiger, he ought to be called “Bear.”“So, what brings me here today?” I asked.“It’s nothing major. Ray Arisa here has shown great interest in Guiger. He said he wants to try his hand at working with us.”“A nobleman, you say?”“That’s right. Isn’t it admirable?” Lord Wolfscott said, patting Ray on the shoulder.“For a nobleman to take an interest in Guiger? Arisa said that to be a good leader, you need to understand the work of those beneath you. I’ve seen many young men in my time, but it’s rare to find one as thorough as him. Truly remarkable… hahaha.”It’s probably because he’s interested in all the well-built men around here.A wave of laughter almost erupted from me. I was genuinely grateful for my mask.“What kind of work are you interested in doing?” I asked.“First, I’d like the opportunity to tour the Guiger headquarters. The private military organization here fascinates me, and I’m eager to learn more.”Hearing this, I smirked silently. This guy went abroad to study in Italy and doesn’t even know the saying, “It’s all in the branding.” Private military organization, my foot. Even stray dogs on the street know Guiger is just a political gangster group. But I suppose, when you’re trying to get in Lord Wolfscott’s good graces, what kind of flattery wouldn’t you spew? In that regard, he was clever.And you get to gawk at all those sturdy men too, huh?Two birds, one stone, huh?I left Lord Wolfscott’s estate with Ray Arisa in tow. Lord Wolfscott’s estate was an ancient 16th-century structure, topped by a golden eagle with two heads, the royal crest, hanging from its pointed triangular roof. It looked like something straight out of a fairy tale, save for the statue of a decapitated saint standing at the entrance. Guiger’s headquarters were right next door—a stark contrast, without even the tiniest bit of decorative molding.Originally, there had been an opera house here, built in the 17th century, but it burned down in 1939. True to the Marxism that was fashionable among even the aristocrats of the time, the building that replaced it was in the Bauhaus style. In a street lined with buildings that were hundreds of years old, Guiger’s headquarters stuck out like oil on water.As we entered the building, I addressed Ray.“You said you were interested in the work of the lower ranks, right? Let’s start from the bottom.”We began with the underground torture chamber. Since the bloodshed had subsided about two years ago, the torture chamber was relatively quiet. There were only a few dozen vagrants being subjected to waterboarding. After showing him the limits of human lung capacity, we briefly toured the third floor. The fourth floor and above were restricted for use by the directors and their immediate subordinates, where all sorts of schemes and confidential information were traded. For security reasons, we stopped at the third floor and headed back outside.“Where are we going? Are there other headquarters?” Ray asked.“The streets are Guiger’s true home. We’re off to break up a protest. For protests involving fewer than a thousand people, only the captains are deployed. But for crowds exceeding ten thousand, the directors step in. Today’s protest is taking place in the plaza in front of the royal palace.”Behind our jeep, a convoy of trucks and trailers loaded with Guiger troops followed. After a two-hour drive, we arrived at the palace plaza. The scene was grim even from a distance. The sky was thick with black smoke, and protesters were running in every direction, clashing with police armed with batons. Flags and torn pamphlets littered the ground, and the barricades had long since collapsed.Today’s crowd numbered 17,000—the largest protest in recent times. The demonstrations would likely continue until the parliamentary elections. According to our intelligence, Manen had instigated the protest, gathering not only the street vagrants but also gangsters from all over the country. It was the perfect prey to vent my frustrations on.We began by deploying a large number of tear gas canisters. Then, we sent out waves of heavily armored troops armed with gas masks and steel pipes. Under the fists and pipes of our enthusiastic men, the protesters fell like autumn leaves. It was like fish taking to water. Driving the jeep, I barked orders into the radio connected to the loudspeaker, yelling things like “Take out that guy’s head!” “Take down the six on the left!” and “More gas, keep spraying!” I was relentless. The directors involved in today’s operation included myself, Leopard, Vulture, Copperhead, and Jaguar, five of us in total. We closed in from five different directions, tightening the noose around the protesters. We caught and beat them all senseless. It was exhilarating.After four hours, the job was done. The protesters, now bound and subdued, were dragged off by the police. Paramedics loaded the severely injured into ambulances, their faces lit with satisfaction. Hospitals had been overwhelmed with injuries from these protests lately, and the tear gas manufacturers were enjoying a boom. This whole situation was, in its own twisted way, a boost to the domestic economy.“It’s mostly wrapped up. I hope you enjoyed the tour,” I said.Ray Arisa only moved his lips, unable to speak. His pale face was pressed into a corner of the jeep, trembling. For four hours, vagrants and gangsters had been following our jeep, banging on the windows with their fists and clubs, glaring at him. It must have felt like being surrounded by demons.“Not something you’d see in Italy, huh?”“W-well, I-I-it was… i-interesting in its own way,” Ray stammered, adjusting his tie.I snorted.“This isn’t the kind of thing a noble should be interested in. These rough jobs are meant for us commoners.”“By the way, why did we only tour up to the third floor? The building has seven floors, doesn’t it?”“For security reasons. Lord Wolfscott wouldn’t have allowed a tour of the fourth floor and above.”“What kind of operations are handled there that require such strict security?”“Ask Lord Wolfscott yourself.”Ray Arisa fell silent. He had some sense, at least.I dropped the man with sideburns off in front of Lord Wolfscott’s residence and headed straight to the headquarters. After shedding my uniform coat and mask in the office, I soothed my throat with some vodka. My throat was raw from all the shouting I’d done.I sat back in the chair, taking a moment to rest. Suddenly, I remembered what Ray had asked me for when I visited him yesterday: he wanted me to bring his cell phone and charger from home. A phone, a device meant for communication with others. It surprised me that Ray had one. Even more so, when it rang, he’d quickly brushed me off and rushed to the bathroom to answer it.I tapped my fingers on the table.Could there be another man?My fingers froze mid-tap.Ha ha ha.What a joke…I chuckled to myself in disbelief. The fleeting feeling I had experienced was nothing short of ridiculous. It was obvious—I was jealous. But did I even have the right to feel jealousy? From the very first night, I had known Ray was inexperienced, yet I had still done unspeakable things to him, and not just me—Leopard had joined in too.Men… we’re truly hopeless creatures.I clicked my tongue as I took another swig of vodka. The fact that I was feeling jealous meant I must have become quite attached to his body. Yet Ray remained oblivious to me. He hadn’t even bothered to ask my name. And yet here he was, waiting for someone’s call, clutching a phone.It was certain. Ray wasn’t the type to date women while meeting with me on the side. No, it was definitely a man. I couldn’t help but wonder what sort of man had managed to captivate Ray so thoroughly. The thought of this man, imagining him with Ray’s amber-colored hair, made my blood boil. It felt like the heat was coursing through my entire body.The absurdity of getting so worked up over such thoughts made me laugh out loud. This was ridiculous. Even street thugs wouldn’t act this way. I downed several more shots of vodka, desperately trying to calm myself, but the feeling wouldn’t subside.The internal phone rang, jolting me back to my senses. I grabbed the receiver—it was Lord Wolfscott.“Ray Arisa told me the tour was very impressive.”Of course it was.“Did he? He must be quite the character.”“You think so too? I knew my judgment was on point… So, I’ve been thinking, how about appointing him as an interim head of Guiger and giving him some responsibilities? What do you think?”I nearly choked on my vodka. I quickly wiped my lips as I responded, “Excuse me?”“He can’t take on any major duties right away, of course, but we could start by giving him a probationary period. The guy’s smart. During our conversation earlier, he seemed to already have a solid grasp of the inner workings here, even though he’s only just returned to the country.”“There’s a potential security issue, though.”“That’s precisely why I took special notice of him. Since he just got back from overseas, we can be 100% sure he has no connections to the tattooed nobility. He’s clean. As long as we don’t officially announce him as a head of Guiger, security won’t be an issue. He’s a good kid, I tell you. Reminds me of myself in my younger days. Back then, I used to roam the streets like I owned the place… Haha! What’s there to be so serious about? It’s not like your work is any different in the end, right?”I finally said something.“What makes you so certain he’s such a remarkable talent?”“Call it intuition.”Ugh…I forced a smile as my brow furrowed. There was no point in arguing further. I ended the conversation with a curt, “Understood,” and hung up. After finishing the last of my vodka, I sprang to my feet.I put on my civilian coat and left the office. I took the private elevator down from the division heads’ meeting room. When I reached the ground floor, I found myself at the records department—the most isolated place within the headquarters, resembling a maze. Despite its title, the department’s primary job was merely clipping newspapers.64% of Guiger’s enforcers were illiterate. The only activities they engaged in at headquarters involved gathering in groups for boxing matches. No one ever came to the records department to read, and besides, it was off-limits for regular enforcers.All of the staff working in the records department were, in fact, division heads disguised as clerks. They showed up in the morning with stacks of newspapers, quickly finished their “work,” and then took the elevator. Their destination? The division heads’ meeting room. There, they donned those cursed masks and division-head-exclusive uniform coats, transforming into something else entirely.This ridiculous charade was all Lord Wolfscott’s idea. The absurd masks and this whole transformation routine—he’d clearly been a fan of superhero cartoons in his youth. It was all so messed up. I was certain that Lord Wolfscott had long forgotten the original reason he’d forced the division heads to wear masks. Protecting our identities was now just a convenient excuse; he seemed to simply enjoy terrifying the nobles.As a result, the division heads had no choice but to recognize each other’s faces. While the names and personal details of those registered as records clerks were fake, their faces were not. For seven long years, we’d carried on this ridiculous charade, knowing each other only by face and using nicknames. There was a rumor that the previous generation of division heads had all quit en masse seven years ago because they had asked Lord Wolfscott to stop the mask-wearing nonsense, only to be flatly rejected. It probably wasn’t far from the truth.When I arrived at the records department, I found Leopard reading the newspaper. I decided to take him to the cafeteria to discuss the new recruit. As expected, Leopard was furious.“That arrogant bastard! We had to work our way up from the streets for three years before reaching head status, and this kid just jumps straight to the top? Lord Wolfscott must’ve lost his mind!”Leopard couldn’t shout due to the surrounding eyes, so he took out his frustration by viciously chewing on his steak. The knife sliced through the meat, and crimson juices dripped down.“So, what kind of guy is he? How’s his temperament?”“He’s sharp and quick-witted. Looks remind me of a younger Lord Wolfscott. He’s no pushover.”“Hmph, the kid knows how to kiss Lord Wolfscott’s ass, at least. This is wild. A noble brat volunteering to head Guiger? Who knows, he might actually end up becoming Lord Wolfscott’s adopted son.”“The immediate problem is security. Lord Wolfscott doesn’t know what we’ve been doing behind the scenes while serving as division heads. That guy could easily figure out that we’ve spent years gathering intelligence on our own. If he takes that information and uses it to make a name for himself, we’d have done all the work just for him to take the credit.”“We’ll need to keep him occupied with riot control for the time being.”“Oh, and…”I grinned.“He’s gay.”“What?”Leopard paused, the steak halfway to his mouth.“I first saw him while escorting the Captain when you weren’t around. The way he ogled the captains’ bodies was to die for. Today, I was alone with him for a moment in Lord Wolfscott’s office, and he was openly drooling over me. I bet he’s definitely a bottom.”“Hehehehe.”Leopard wiped his mouth with a napkin, laughing.“Who knows, we might even get an order to share a bed with him.”“It’s not impossible. He looks down on anyone who isn’t nobility. So, Leopard, would you go through with it if he asked you to?”“Wouldn’t it be an honor to shove my dick up a noble’s ass? No reason to refuse.”I shrugged.“Then I’ll leave that pricey ass to you.”“So, he’s hairy or a big guy, right?”“How’d you know?”“After years of us screwing around, don’t you think I’d know your tastes by now?”“Of course.”We clinked our glasses, laughing.The next day, after finishing work, I headed to 42nd Street. I picked up my phone and charger from Ray’s place. After some thought, I decided to turn on Ray’s phone. The password input screen appeared. I typed in the four digits of his birthday, which I had memorized while looking through his personal information. It didn’t work. The plan to drag him out and crush his dickhead fell apart.Hahaha, looks like Ray’s luck is holding up. Anyway, I decided I’d pay Ray a visit today.꙳•❅*ִIt was late afternoon, the twilight setting in. A bird flew through the cold air and landed on a snow-covered branch. The snow, tinged red by the sunset, sparkled. The bird soon leaped off the branch, carrying a milk-colored berry in its beak.I wondered where it found the berry. Maybe it was mistletoe, I thought absentmindedly.Mistletoe stands out in the middle of winter. The only semi-parasitic plant that lives off trees instead of the ground. A plant that weakens its host and ultimately kills it, a bringer of both life and death.Mistletoe symbolizes the winter solstice, blessings on vegetation, fertility, growth, and those who open the gates to the underworld. During Christmas, people gather under its golden-tinted green branches to kiss. There are countless other rituals involving mistletoe. The most famous of them is the Druids’ mistletoe ritual.Mistletoe that grows on oak trees is especially rare. When the Druids discovered mistletoe on an oak, they held a solemn ceremony on the sixth day of the lunar calendar. A priest dressed in white would climb the oak, cutting the mistletoe with a golden sickle, and catch it in his robe. Then, they would offer a white bull as a sacrifice, praying to the gods for prosperity.Druid priests believed that a drink made from mistletoe could help barren animals conceive and cure all poisons. To them, mistletoe juice was divine semen.In ancient times, people would hang mistletoe branches on their doors to ward off witches. There was a superstition that plants not rooted in the ground were beyond the reach of witches’ powers. Mistletoe was also offered to Persephone in the underworld. In order for the dead to pass through the gate and return to the world of the living, a ritual had to be performed first. In The Aeneid, it is sung like this:“On a shady tree, there is hidden a branch with golden leaves and a supple stem, consecrated to Persephone of the underworld. The entire forest conceals it, and a gloomy valley covers it in shadow. But only those who tear off a fruit-bearing golden leaf from that tree will be able to pass through the hidden place beneath the ground. This is the rule set by the beautiful Persephone herself.Even if the first branch is torn off, the second one will remain, holding golden leaves like a treasure. So, now raise your eyes and search for it. If you find it, tear it off with your hands, and it will come to you easily, as if of its own will.”I stared into space. It was floating in the blood-red sky. The pure white blizzard that only appears in the dead of winter, the Queen of Snow, whose power not even my spells could drive away.Before I knew it, I was muttering.“So now, raise your eyes and search for it. If you find it, tear it off with your hands, and it will come to you easily, as if of its own will…”I informed Lord Manen that I hadn’t been able to get in touch because I had been unexpectedly hospitalized. When I told him I probably wouldn’t be discharged for another ten days, he replied that he would refrain from contacting me unless it was an emergency.“I didn’t even get a handshake from him. That arrogant shepherd! Just thinking about what he did to me that day… Oh, my head.”The voice on the other end of the phone trembled with hatred and fear. A while ago, I saw a news report on the hospital TV about how Lotus had been mentally shattered after Guiger’s brutal crackdown on protests and was recovering. Now, it seemed that the “mental shattering” wasn’t due to the protests after all.“Please calm down. But yes, he certainly was rude.”“Don’t even mention it. Who could have imagined I’d face such humiliation at my age? His voice echoes in my ears when I sleep, and his gaze haunts me like a command when I wake up. He was nothing like the cocky figure that swaggered around while guarding Wolfscott at that party. Face-to-face, this shepherd is something else. His aura, his mannerisms, everything about him… He’s bound to cause trouble someday.”“So, did you at least shake hands with the new blood?”“My body’s in bad shape these days. And since you’re going to be in the hospital for another ten days, let’s both focus on recovery for now. Wolfscott has his party schedule packed for the next two weeks, so even if we start gathering in ten days, it won’t be too late.”“Well, then we have no choice. Contact me in ten days. Take care of yourself.”“Haha, to think I’d suffer such a humiliation in my life… Anyway, we’ll think about revenge later. See you in ten days.”I turned off my phone and lay down, staring at the ceiling.It had been a week since I was admitted. Hospital life wasn’t much different from when I was at home. Yesterday, I had a full check-up. I thought it would just be a blood test, but it took quite a while. I wondered if a full check-up was part of inpatient treatment, but then I found out later—it was something the man had arranged separately.He was a strange one, no doubt. The type to give both the disease and the cure. The third time he visited my room, didn’t he demand oral sex from me? It would’ve been strange if that pervert had behaved, but the very next day, he arranged for me to have a full check-up.It’s starting again…I couldn’t help but laugh. Messara, unbuttoning my patient gown, remained calm. With swift movements, he climbed onto the bed and lay beside me, touching my chest. Lost in thought, as he always did, he pulled me into contemplation as well.Messara came here just two days after his last visit. During those two days, I looked at the clock multiple times, waiting for him. It was unsettling to realize how eagerly I awaited him. I even pondered why I kept doing this. Was it because of his relentless demeanor? Because of his courteous manner up until the point where he fulfilled my repulsive desires? Was it because, after many nights together, I had become genuinely gay? Was it because of my long-standing thirst for human attention? Or was it simply desire for his manhood?I set aside those thoughts. Whatever the reason, I decided not to care anymore. I chose to focus solely on the fact that I wanted Messara.After all, I might die soon. I thought bitterly.“By the way,” Messara said.“I asked the on-call nurse about your check-up results on my way in. The results came in, but why haven’t you checked them?”“I forgot.”“You don’t care much about your own body, do you? I skimmed through it briefly; nothing abnormal showed up. Your blood pressure is low, but not severely.”“I figured as much.”I answered half-heartedly. I found it amusing that, while pretending to care for me, Messara blatantly pressed his stiff lower abdomen against me.Poe… the symbol of death.Unconsciously, I had intertwined death with the body. Somehow, it seemed meaningful. In some ways, he was the most fitting partner for me.Messara guided my hand down to explore his lower abdomen. It was a hard, large object. I remembered the feeling when it had penetrated me. My excitement gradually built. Messara licked my earlobe with his tongue. A chilling pleasure spread throughout my body. We shared a long kiss. I liked kissing. I liked it more than sex. I liked the shadow of Messara’s face as he hovered over me. I liked the way his hands caressed my ear and nape while we kissed. I liked the breath that came close. I liked the feel of clothes peeling off my body.Slowly, I extended my arm to wrap it around his neck. Our bodies pressed together. Messara whispered.“Wait.”He then stood up and undressed. His movements were so casual they almost seemed nonchalant. His body was moderately muscular, not built for show but naturally toned through repeated rough days, as if he had been born with it.Messara pulled down the sheet. Probably to avoid staining it with semen. He climbed back onto the bed, spread my legs, and said,“You seem quite eager today. You know that I’m not someone who stops just because the other is a patient, right?”“Am I eager?”“Of course. If you were passive, you wouldn’t be acting like this. Haha.”Messara laughed, lightly flicking my erection. Then he buried his head between my legs. My legs trembled involuntarily.Death and the plains…In moments like this, he was no longer Four but Messara. When he was intense, he was cruel like a grim reaper, yet when he caressed me sweetly, he felt like fertile soil. After a long time, I reached climax.Messara smirked as he enjoyed the look on my face. He sat me up, pressed his lower abdomen to my mouth, and mischievously said,“You want to suck it, don’t you?”I couldn’t answer. Blood rushed to my face.“You want to suck it, right? Say it. I want to hear you.”“Yes…”Messara laughed loudly at my embarrassed tone. He grabbed my chin and slowly inserted his penis. It was large and firm, with a sour smell. As I sucked on his penis, his hand reached between my buttocks. Oil was slowly applied. This was one of Messara’s preferred techniques, being tall and having unusually long arms. He never rushed. Though sometimes lost in thought, he always took his time and led the pace. Even as he applied oil, he didn’t neglect the caressing.I almost got lost in delusion, thinking maybe he saw me as more than just a sexual partner—such a foolish thought.Just like when I suddenly remembered finding a note sticking out from under the pillowcase, I recalled the first night I had been with Messara.He had been kind that night too.“Aren’t you in too much pain? This is tricky. Where do you feel it the most?”Messara, penetrating me from behind, asked. I couldn’t answer because my mouth was occupied by his friend’s relentless thrusts. Though I had agreed to it, actually doing it was overwhelming. I was being penetrated simultaneously, both orally and anally. It wasn’t shame but pain that twisted my bones. My mouth was filled with his friend’s penis, and I could only rock back and forth without being able to scream.“There’s no blood, but…”Messara muttered as he caressed every inch of my body.“Is it a bit better? Relax your waist and focus here.”Even back then, Messara had been the same as he was now. He voiced concern but never stopped penetrating. Instead, he kept asking where I felt it, searching for my reaction. He and his friend explored me for a long time.Suddenly, my mind went blank, as if filled with cigarette smoke—dark and thick.Messara exhaled a long trail of smoke. He didn’t look pleased. It seemed he hadn’t satisfied his twisted desires in that session. His hair, a few strands falling over his forehead, touched his eyebrows. Deep within his seemingly cold eyes, dissatisfaction flickered.Unlike Messara, who appeared indifferent, I was exhausted. Lying on his arm, I barely managed to breathe. After more than an hour of sex, my lower body throbbed. Messara enjoyed ejaculating inside. This time, he ejaculated inside me all three times. For him, oral seemed to be just foreplay.For some reason, I felt a bit ridiculous.“It seems like this still isn’t enough for you,” I said.“Well…” Messara muttered, exhaling smoke.“What can I do? Since you’re a patient, I have to be lenient.”After spending an entire hour on penetrative sex and finishing everything inside me, to call it “leniency”… truly impressive. I thought back to the first time we had sex, with Messara not stopping for even a second while asking if I was okay. A wry smile crept across my face.But I was the fool. The idea that sex between men was nothing more than fumbling around—it was absurdly naive of me to follow along with such a vague assumption. Having lived in a brothel, and at my age, being so ignorant about gay sex was simply pathetic.I must have chuckled out loud, as Messara shot a glance my way. His eyes asked, “Why are you laughing?”Eventually, Messara stubbed out his cigarette and stood up. He pulled out another one and walked over to the window. Sitting on the windowsill, he lit it and opened the window slightly. A humid, chilly breeze wafted in like a veil. Messara flicked his ashes outside and gazed up at the night sky. The sight seemed completely natural. White smoke poured from his lips like a sigh.In that moment, his naked body, bathed in a pale glow, struck me as beautiful. His smooth body had almost no hair.Watching him get dressed, I closed my eyes. The weariness of sleep was washing over me.“You should wash up before you sleep. We’re in a hospital, after all,” Messara said, shaking my shoulder.“I’m too tired. Who cares…”I soon passed out, and when I opened my eyes, it was almost noon. I was still in my patient gown, a sheet covering me. Messara was sitting in a chair, flipping through a newspaper.“I cleaned up a bit while you were sleeping. But you really should wash properly.”Heh… he’s good with words.“Aren’t you going to go break up protests today?”“It’s Sunday. Unless it’s something serious, we take time off from Saturday afternoon through Sunday. Besides, if I go out now, I’ll be stuck in traffic all day.”Come to think of it, the snowfall had been heavy. Hail mixed with snow was crashing against the window like waves. In the distance, a forest of fir trees was faintly visible through the blizzard. On impulse, I got up.“Where are you going? Lunch will be here soon. You haven’t even had breakfast,” Messara asked.“The lounge.”“The lounge? What for?”Ignoring his puzzled look, I headed to the lounge. From the fifth-floor lounge, the fir tree forest was even clearer than from the second-floor hospital room.The blizzard was fierce. The fir tree forest swayed like a mirage in the swirling snow. It was as if a white curtain was fluttering in the window. Every time the blizzard crashed down, the forest disappeared, only to reemerge as a lush green expanse when the storm momentarily abated. A strange, melancholic pleasure welled up inside me.“What are you staring at?” Messara asked. I didn’t reply.꙳•❅*ִLate in the afternoon, after the snow had stopped, I was still at the hospital. Ray stood by the window in silence. He’d always been the type to stand outside, gazing far off, regardless of the cold. His expression was dark, sullen. His eyes, especially, seemed strange, as if he’d given up on life, like a terminal cancer patient.I lit a cigarette and took a deep drag.Why does someone so young act like that?It was unfamiliar to me. I’d never met someone like him before. Everyone around me was always brimming with energy. Overflowing with it, even. From Lord Wolfscott to my coworkers, and even the countless enemies I faced—they were all like rampaging trailers, ready to crush any obstacle in their way.Ray? I didn’t like him much. I wanted to grab him by the collar and shake him. I couldn’t understand. Twenty-seven years old, isn’t that when life should be at its peak?I liked it when Ray clung to me eagerly, wrapping his arms around my shoulders. It was most enjoyable when he reacted with such vibrant energy. Even last night, he had been like that. Honest in his pleasure, joyful. In a generous mood, I ended the sex without pushing him too far.But come morning, Ray had not only reverted to his indifferent demeanor—he acted as though I were invisible. After spending such a pleasurable night together, what was this? What was with that near-dead expression?One life to live, isn’t it best to enjoy it while you can?Traffic was horrendous. Even though the snow had stopped, the roads were still like a parking lot. I stubbed out the cigarette and lit another. The air was thick with smoke. I rolled down the window, and a cold, damp wind rushed in, like pulling a body out of icy water.Ray’s story from the hospital resurfaced in my mind.“There’s this spirit, Ryeong. Every ten years, Ryeong wakes up somewhere. Always the same place, a large, cold mansion. When Ryeong wakes up, he has taken human form.There’s a man who greets Ryeong. The man says he’s Ryeong’s husband. Ryeong and the man make love. After ten minutes, Ryeong returns to the forest. Ryeong doesn’t know why this happens, and remains indifferent. All that sticks in Ryeong’s memory is the sorrowful face of the husband.This goes on for fifty years. Then, one day, Ryeong stops reincarnating for those ten minutes. Why do you think that is?”‘Who knows?’I shrugged as I sipped my coffee.‘All I can think of is how unfortunate that husband must have been. Only seeing his wife once every ten years, and even then, only for ten minutes. Must have been hectic, haha. But now I’m curious too, why did Ryeong stop reincarnating after fifty years?’“Probably because her husband died. Human lives are finite, after all.”“That’s simple enough. But what’s the point of that story?”“I don’t know. When I first heard it, I only thought the husband was pitiable. But the more I think about it, the more I wonder why the spirit reincarnated every ten years. And only for ten minutes. Every time, the husband would always be there.”“Didn’t he remarry?”“The spirit was indifferent to humans, so I doubt she’d care.”“They must’ve had a good marriage. Maybe that’s why she reincarnated every ten years just to see him.”“It could also be the opposite.”“The opposite?”“The husband might have committed a grave sin against his wife.”“Regretting it too late, only to find his wife long gone? So, he’s being punished for it?”Ray then remarked that the spirit seemed carefree. For some reason, she reincarnated every ten years for a brief ten minutes to meet the same man. Whether it was because they had a loving marriage, or because the husband had sinned, or perhaps the wife had sinned instead, the spirit was indifferent. So, what did it matter?“But surely the husband must’ve suffered a lot.”“That’s none of the spirit’s concern.”A car horn blared from behind, and I hurriedly gripped the wheel. The line of cars had started to move again. Before long, though, it came to a stop. It seemed unlikely that I would make it home in three hours.I went to stub out my cigarette and noticed the ashtray was shaped like a chrysanthemum. I grabbed a plastic bag from the floor and emptied the ashtray. Lighting another cigarette, I turned up the radio. The news of Manen came on — apparently, after being transferred to the hospital a few days ago, his condition had shown no improvement.I chuckled. Manen’s theatrics were laughable. It was all a ploy to garner sympathy ahead of the upcoming election. Or maybe he had just collapsed out of anger at that meeting?The thought amused me. Smiling, I took a deep drag from my cigarette.That spirit… she sure had it easy.As a fellow man, I couldn’t help but sympathize with the husband. Was it even possible? Meeting your wife for just ten minutes every ten years, and that dragging on for fifty years? It was absurd. Fifty years. That meant they’d only meet five times. That was practically hell.The mere thought of it was unbearable. I didn’t even want to consider the possibility. The whole story was deeply unpleasant. I wasn’t sure why, but the more I thought about it, the more something inside me boiled.I didn’t want to imagine the husband waiting all those long years just for his wife. Surely, he must have remarried. He must have, and then every ten years, he would meet his old wife. Perhaps he even found a strange kind of thrill in those brief reunions with a wife frozen in time. How else could any man endure such torment?What a miserable existence.I couldn’t help but click my tongue. It was pathetic to think that Ray, with his wretched life, clung to such a gloomy story. No wonder he was still penniless at his age. If he lived as busily as I did, he wouldn’t have time to wallow in such melancholy tales.Maybe next time I visit, I’ll take him sledding. Come to think of it, I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d been sledding.The line of cars started moving again. Feeling lighter, I gripped the wheel. When we go sledding, I’ll be sure to ask Ray about his high-and-mighty companion.On his first day at work, sideburns was ignored by the department heads all day. It was expected. They had spent three years on the streets getting knocked around before earning their positions. It wasn’t a seat just anyone could occupy.You could dismiss it as petty pride, but at Guiger, it took an average of two years to rise from the rank of ordinary soldier to captain. We weren’t public servants or official military; the best we could hope for were ranks like captain, chief, or head. But considering the effort it took to earn those titles, that pride was justified.That evening, the enraged department heads gathered for a group meeting.“Gay, is he?”Jaguar, sipping vodka, burst into laughter.“Admiring that fine figure, catching Lord Wolfscott’s eye, huh? No wonder he kept sizing me up, asking if I’d take off my mask. Now I get it.”Lizard, chewing on a shashlik, scoffed.“By the way, I heard why that bastard rose so quickly through the ranks at Release. The report came in yesterday.”All eyes turned to Leopard. I swirled my vodka and asked, “Something noteworthy enough to make it into a report? Not just a rich family and good looks?”“That’s part of it. But there’s another fun reason. He claims to be the reincarnation of the 12th head of the Arisa family.”“The reincarnation of who? Hah! What nonsense is that? Nobles, I swear…”The department heads chuckled.Leopard lit a cigarette and shrugged.“Well, you know how nobles are. They live and die by lineage and pedigree. The 12th head of the Arisa family was Shykan Arisa. According to the rumor mill, the young lord was a bit peculiar as a child. The family wasn’t all that wealthy back then, but apparently, the young lord discovered Shykan Arisa’s hidden treasure, and that’s how they became so rich. Believe it?”Instantly, the responses flooded in: “Nope.” “Not at all.” “Sounds like crap.”“Sounds like something out of a Rasputin tale.”I snuffed out my cigarette with a smirk.Leopard raised his hand, laughing.“Rasputin? With equipment like mine, huh? Judging by the front of his pants, he’s not packing that much. Anyway, that’s supposedly how he’s charmed the Release members. Nobles just eat that stuff up. They love their reincarnation games. And since the young lord claims to be the reincarnation of the valiant Shykan Arisa, they’re all taken in.”“And they seriously believe that crap?”Vulture let out a disbelieving laugh. At that moment, Copperhead, who had been silent until then, suddenly muttered,“Tibetan ritual, huh…”Copperhead was the only one among the department heads who had graduated from college, and he belonged to the intelligence division. I pulled out a cigarette and lit it.“Why are you suddenly talking about Tibet?”“Tibet has deep ties with this country’s royal family. There’s an interesting tradition in Tibet. The leader of the Gelug sect of Tibetan Buddhism is the Dalai Lama, and the way they select the Dalai Lama is quite peculiar. Do you know what it is?”“How would we know?”“It’s through reincarnation. They look for the reincarnated person and crown him as the Dalai Lama. When the Dalai Lama dies, a regent called the ‘Retting Rinpoche,’ meaning ‘spiritual teacher,’ manages the affairs until the reincarnated Dalai Lama is found.”There really were a lot of crazy people in this world.“There’s a theory that the founder of our kingdom came from Tibet, which is why early on, the kingdom had many Eastern traditions and laws. There’s even a theory that the powerful authority of the kingdom’s Lotus comes from the role of the Retting Rinpoche in Tibet. So, the aristocrats here have been fascinated with reincarnation for a long time. While we find it laughable, they probably take it quite seriously.”I started coughing in the middle of taking a drag on my cigarette. Laughter burst out. I couldn’t help but recall the conversation I had with Ray.“What, Snake? Is what I said that funny?”Copperhead said with a flushed face. He was clearly annoyed that his serious explanation had been met with such laughter.I took a drink of vodka and suppressed my laughter.“Oh, no, it’s just… if what you say is true, it means our great king is actually an Asian who came from Tibet. That’s a pretty hilarious story.”“Well, yeah. If you look at the portraits of the founder of the kingdom passed down by the royal family, he looks unmistakably Asian. The royal family insists it’s just the art style of the time, but that’s just them covering their eyes. Standing next to this obviously Asian king are his companions, all of whom are pointed-nose Caucasians.”The department heads burst into laughter. They all pounded the table with their fists, laughing uncontrollably. I, too, lit another cigarette and chuckled. At this rate, Sideburns might actually end up being adopted by Lord Wolfscott.As Copperhead suggested, it was a rather clever tactic. Sideburns had approached the nobles with a topic sure to gain favor and quickly secured himself a position. It was clear what his game was. It wouldn’t be long before he’d be saying something like, “Actually, I’m the noble reincarnation of Shaikan.” I was seriously beginning to suspect that Sideburns might have been Rasputin in a past life.Copperhead poured vodka into my glass and continued.“Here’s another interesting story. Shaikan Arisa was an in-law of the royal family at the time, and he formed a private military unit, the Shaikan Corps. Lord Wolfscott created Guiger based on that very Shaikan Corps. In a way, Lord Wolfscott and Shaikan have a lot in common—both were in-laws of the royal family and had their own private military forces. If Sideburns really is the reincarnation of Shaikan, Lord Wolfscott would certainly be interested to see how far he could go. As the original, of course he’d be curious.”The image of Sideburns trembling in the corner of the jeep came to mind. I couldn’t help but laugh.“Ridiculous. The guy’s nothing but a con man.”“Of course.”Leopard raised his glass. The department heads all exchanged smiles and clinked their glasses together.I downed the vodka in one go. As I mused over Shaikan and Arisa, I started planning how to mess with Sideburns.I threw off my coat. I’d had way too much to drink, and my head was throbbing. I loosened my tie and sat on the sofa.I sank into thought. There was still plenty of time before the crown princess selection and the parliamentary elections. Ever since the late king passed, Lord Wolfscott hadn’t established any firm connections with the royal family. If that country girl he’d adopted into his family didn’t become the crown princess, it would be disastrous. There was a slim chance—only about 0.1 percent—that Manen’s faction could overpower Lord Wolfscott’s. But Manen would be dead by my hand before that could happen.Traditionally, the queen had a strong influence over the selection of the crown princess, so I wasn’t too worried. I had a treasure trove of incriminating photos of the queen’s affairs stored in my office. All I had to do was slip one of the most scandalous photos under the salad plate the maid served to the queen each morning. It wouldn’t be surprising if both the queen and her daughter ended up hospitalized together.Haha, this was going to be fun.In a lighthearted mood, I headed to the study. I sat down at the computer and started browsing for luxury homes. On the way back from the hospital the other day, I’d been thinking. I was tired of watching Ray wallow in misery. Everything in moderation—beyond that, it just became pathetic. The idea of meeting for just ten minutes every ten years? The more I thought about it, the more absurd it became. This was the epitome of being a loser.I decided that once Ray was discharged from the hospital, I would set him up as my official mistress. Living together wasn’t possible due to my status, so I scrapped that idea. Instead, I would move him to a new residence. I absolutely hated the house on 42nd Street. The door didn’t even have a doorbell. Whenever I knocked, Ray’s neighbors would give me side-glances, like I was some circus monkey performing a juggling act. It was infuriating.Luckily, there were a few properties on the market. I planned to give Ray one of the houses even after we parted ways. I figured it was a nice enough gift to make him miss me long after I was gone.The mansion on 17th Street seemed perfect. It was close to headquarters, had a great view, and its value would likely skyrocket. I decided to purchase three properties, keep two, and give one to Ray.I stared silently at the pictures of the houses on the monitor. With a little renovation, they’d be quite impressive.He should be grateful his fortunes have turned around because of me…I pulled out a cigarette and smiled faintly.In the darkness, the streetlights drew long lines that disappeared into the distance. It was seven in the evening. Once again, Leopard had skipped out on patrols on 42nd Street due to the endless parties hosted by Lord Wolfscott. Lately, I’d been patrolling 42nd Street alone.The heavy snow had stopped for the first time in days. The air on 42nd Street was thick with laughter and the stench of bodies.Ryeong…I drove in silence, lost in thought.After the failure with Manen, I felt the need to reconsider my thoughts about Ryeong from the ground up. Between Ray’s hospitalization, Sideburns, and everything else, I hadn’t had time to think. Finally, today, I had a moment to regain my focus.I turned down the volume on the radio and pulled out a cigarette. I lit it and turned into the intersection.Ever since the ambush by Manen, one question had persistently swirled in my head: How? Security was tight, so the only possibility was an internal traitor. But I hadn’t even shared my true intentions with my closest comrade, Leopard, until five days before the D-day. The personnel I deployed were all my trusted men, those known for their discretion, and I’d assigned them in a way that no one could grasp the full picture.That left only the inspectors. But they’d all been decapitated by Manen.I ground the cigarette into the ashtray, now reduced to a stub. Then I lit another one, inhaling deeply.They say wisdom sometimes depends on chance…I recalled the story of a French detective who caught a thief after deducing a lead from something as trivial as salty coffee. However, I was no French detective, and I didn’t believe in intuition. I certainly didn’t believe in chance. Aside from some of the groundbreaking discoveries in the history of science, every outcome is the result of inevitability.But for now, that was the only method available to me. I tried to keep a cool head, focusing on what was directly in front of me. There was no way the secret had leaked. Not a crack, not even a needle’s eye. And yet, the secret had gotten out. That left only one conclusion.I had to go find that salty coffee.I parked the car and headed toward the red-light district, walking slowly and scanning my surroundings. I didn’t expect to find a “white wall stained with black splotches” or a “fruit shop with mismatched signs,” but I took my time, strolling leisurely. It was a damp, chilly night. A group of police officers passed by, twirling their batons. Women with smudged lipstick beckoned to men, pulling them in. From a worn-down record shop’s speakers, loud rock music blared, so loud it felt like the ground was shaking.After walking for quite some time, I found myself in a sparsely populated alley. The only person in sight was a beggar huddled at the alley’s entrance, so still they resembled a broken statue. The wind blew through the alley like the rough flap of a crow’s wings, cold and desolate. Inside the narrow alley, there was nothing but pitch-black darkness.Just as I was about to leave the alley, I hesitated. My eyes were drawn to a figure sitting slumped over at the corner. In the deep shadows, their silhouette was barely visible, like a rough brushstroke on a dark canvas.What caught my attention was the coat they were wearing. It looked uncannily similar to Ray’s musty fur coat.How could there possibly be another coat like that in the world? Sitting like that, they were the spitting image of Ray.Intrigued, I headed toward the figure. As I approached, their form became clearer. It was an old woman, wearing that same musty fur coat, gripping a white poplar cane in one hand.Ha…This is really taking me back…I recalled the first time I met Ray at Snow White. He had appeared before us suddenly, wearing that bizarre coat. His first impression had been so gloomy that for a while, Leopard and I would reminisce, joking, “It felt like we were nervously waiting for a fortune reading in front of a witch.”The old woman’s coat wasn’t just similar to Ray’s; it was identical. The large hood, the rough, shapeless cut that hid her figure, the length that reached down to her feet, even the patches where the fur had been eaten away in places.The only thing visible beneath the overwhelming fur coat was her face. Her nose was hooked, and her lips and philtrum, deeply etched by time, were wrinkled. With that face and the eerie fur coat, she truly looked like a witch.I stood in front of her for a moment, gazing down.“Do you know someone named Ryeong?”I asked impulsively, half-amused.The old woman slowly raised her head. Under the shadow of her hood, a pair of murky hazel eyes appeared. Then, her shriveled lips parted like a cave, and a voice that seemed to scratch at the darkness creaked out.“Of course. I am Ryeong.”“…”I almost lunged at her on the spot.“You’re Ryeong, huh? Then you must know me well, don’t you? You did a great job messing with me recently.”I deliberately taunted her. The old woman blinked, her hazel eyes betraying clear confusion, as if she didn’t understand what I was saying.Tch…Of course not.There was no way this old woman was my “salty coffee.”No, even the very idea of venturing out into the streets to search for some chance clue was foolish. I laughed softly and plopped down on the ground, staring directly at the old woman. Her hazy, cataract-clouded eyes were dull and lifeless. This old woman who called herself Ryeong was clearly a third-rate charlatan witch.“I know you’re not Ryeong. Well, since I’m here, how about a fortune reading?”“I don’t read cards, dear. I hear voices from the crystal.”“I don’t care. Whatever works.”“What do you wish to know?”I thought for a moment. Amusingly, Ray was the first thing that came to mind. It seemed I was rather taken with him.“Well, let’s say… romance?”“Romance, is it…”The witch smirked and pulled a crystal ball from her coat. I was slightly surprised. As the crystal ball emerged from her fur coat, the dingy, squalid alley was suddenly bathed in radiant light. It was as if the countless candles on a Christmas tree had been lit, just like the ones that appeared when a little match girl struck a match.“Luck is on your side, young man. I may not look it, but I’m quite renowned for my expertise in romance. I was just about to leave 42nd Street today, but it seems you’ve caught me.”Her tone had changed, becoming more confident. I grinned.“Why are you leaving?”“Don’t you know? At my age, I don’t want to be dragged off to work in an oil factory. It’s the end of the world, the end. 42nd Street used to be considered the mecca for us witches, but that’s ancient history now… Tsk tsk.”The witch clicked her tongue while rubbing the crystal ball. Her old, bony hands were as rough as the bark of an ancient tree. I sank into thought. 42nd Street, a former mecca among witches…I had assumed the reason there were so many fortune-tellers here was simply due to the clientele—mostly prostitutes. Could there be some other reason?Suddenly, the witch let out a gasp.“This is interesting! Death and life, hmm?”I snapped back to attention.“One is death, and one is life… how fascinating. Young man, how did you meet this young lady?”I scoffed at her use of “young lady.” No need to clarify that I’m gay. But death? Was she referring to me—Four, a born sadist who gets blood on his hands every day?“Yeah, one is death, that’s right. But what about life?”“Energy is just bursting forth. She can’t sit still, constantly moving about, making a fuss. It’s quite something, hohoho.”She was a fraud. Ray, who usually stared out the window, brimming with energy? I almost laughed out loud, recalling Ray’s joke about “ten minutes every ten years.” Still, this was entertaining.“So? What’s your take?”“Well… I need to look into death a bit more. I’ll have a chat with the crystal spirit, so wait a moment, young man.”The witch closed her eyes and furrowed her brow. Her shoulders trembled as if some other spirit was inhabiting her body.No wonder women fall for this…I smirked internally, waiting for the nonsense she was about to spew.“Hmm.”Her lips twitched.“Death… is incredibly strong. Too dark and powerful for life to do anything.”Of course, old lady.I thought of Ray, trembling and powerless beneath me, and barely stifled my laughter.“Death is too strong. It’s so dark, I can’t see anything. Young man, as for that young lady… I’m sorry, but she… she isn’t…”“Are you saying my love life is doomed? In other words, it’s a bust?”I was starting to get irritated.“Hmm, it’s worse than that.”The witch sighed heavily, as if she wanted to say more but held back.Suddenly, anger surged through me. I threw a few bills into her face and shot up. My mood was utterly ruined. It felt like my blood was boiling.“Hahaha.”The witch shook her head and gathered the bills. I took a few steps before pausing.“Hey, old woman. Where did you get that coat?”“This coat? Why? Why do you ask, young man?”“Someone I know wears the same one.”The witch grinned mischievously.“Well… around here, it’s pretty common to hand these coats down.”So, it’s a coat for the poor on 42nd Street?“Good luck. You’ll need it.”The witch mumbled as she tucked the crystal ball away. I stood there, rooted in place, with something still gnawing at me. I couldn’t pinpoint what it was.The witch propped herself up with her aspen cane and started walking. Her gait was unsteady, but her pace was quick. Before long, she had left the alley, her eerie black fur coat blending into the lit-up street.As she disappeared, I heard her sigh.“You really care for that young lady, don’t you… tsk tsk tsk.”I turned and headed in the opposite direction. Without realizing it, my pace quickened. My anger surged, something boiling up from deep inside. It spread throughout my body, waves crashing over me in an instant. My heart felt like it was engulfed in flames.Suddenly, a whisper brushed past my ear.“There is no turning back in life. All tragedies return like wind drifting through the darkness. That is fate, Messara.”I instinctively froze. Quickly, I glanced around. No one was there. The witch was gone, and even the beggar huddled in the alley was nowhere to be seen. Only darkness dissolved into the lights. It felt like a dream.The whisper lingered in my mind as I drove home. “There is no turning back in life. All tragedies return like wind drifting through the darkness. That is fate, Messara.”The more I thought about it, the more unsettling it became. I smoked a whole pack of cigarettes on the way back. I convinced myself that the anger overwhelming me had caused the hallucination.꙳•❅*ִWhen Messara visited the hospital, he suddenly suggested going sledding.“Sledding? Why sledding?”“What do you mean why? You’ve been staring out the window so intently, didn’t you notice?”Messara gestured toward the window. The hill to the left of the hospital was bustling with people sledding. Bright yellow lights from the tower at the top of the hill illuminated the area.”