Why are you special?

Job done at the guildhall, we go right next door, the same tavern where we met up. Paul, Carter, and Wally all go to a corner table; I follow. A dark-skinned elven waitress with a short skirt and a too-tight laced bodice comes up to us, "So…  what'll you have?"

Paul … or I should say Paula, I need to get used to the new names… looks deeply into the woman's cleavage, then sighs and looks away, "A bottle of whiskey, five glasses, and four bowls of whatever stew you're serving."

As the waitress leaves, I follow up on that: "Why five glasses?"

Carter… Christine, rather … fills me in: "In honor of Lorin, our lost brother in arms."

"Ah." Yeah, that's a good spot to stop asking. I didn't know the guy, but try to keep a respectful silence anyway.

The mood is quite somber.  When the drinks arrive, … Wendy… pours all five glasses, and we all grab one.

Paul…a breaks the silence, "To Lorin, he was a good trapper and a great friend. His loss diminishes us all."

I join in on the chorus of "To Lorin!" And we all drink. Lorin's glass sits full and untouched, as the rest of us work our way through the bottle.

On… her, I need to get used to the new pronouns to go with the cover… fourth glass … Wendy quietly checks with me: 《Why aren’t I feeling the whisky?》

Yeah, some buffs have downsides… 《That would be the Delay Poison effect.  It’s the same as the one Carter… Christine, rather, I need to get used to all of our new names… uses when you’re going wild with Stinking Cloud spells, but when I do it, it lasts MUCH longer.  And yes, it prevents you from getting drunk.》

《Aha.  Well, Donna, can you perhaps remove it?》

《Yeah, sure.  Here…》I touch … her … and dismiss that one, and then do the same for Paula and Christine, mentioning it to them, “Sorry, one of the spells I used to protect you has the unfortunate side effect of blunting beer and whisky, too.  I just pulled that, you should be feeling it now.”

Paula staggers slightly, “Ah, that’s what I’ve been missing…” and gets back to the serious business of drinking.  They still won’t get properly drunk - Sheltered Vitality will still prevent many of the effects of poison - but they’re now feeling it, at least.

I find Paula and Christine keep glancing at me, each other, and the girls in the tavern that are showing a bit more skin with longing, then looking away.  I take a moment to ask them about it, “So… those looks you keep sending me…”

Christine cops to it, “Well… you know why… we used to be… but now we’re…” she puts her hand to her neck, and runs it down her front, emphasizing her curves and ending the gesture between her legs, “... and The Blessed Mother told us, directly, that indulging with … other women… while this way is wrong, we need to…” Christine glances at one of the guys in the bar, and quickly looks away, “... but as her priesthood, we’re also supposed to avoid things like Night Tea, and while I could… maybe get used to being with a man, I’m not ready to go through what will happen if I … indulge… with a man.”

Aha.  Well… I can’t readily apply Block the Seed to others yet - it’s a personal spell, and while I could try Body To Body, that would risk myself a bit… one more feat to get past that … but there’s more than one way to scratch that itch, and this guy is too funny, “That only applies if his seed gets in your birthing channel.  You have two other warm, wet holes I’m sure whatever man you pick will be happy to use.”

Paula’s eyebrows shoot up, “But… The Blessed Mother says…”

I interrupt, “Well, you’ve got a couple of options,” I hold up my dainty little hand, with one finger out, “One, you can do nothing, and just deal with the heat,” I add a finger, “Two, you can try relieving yourselves with your hands or whatever you have available,” I add a thumb, “Three, you can take a risk that women have been taking for as long as there have been women,” I duck my thumb back down and put all four fingers up, “Four, you can do something The Blessed Mother won’t like,” I put my hand back down, “...which apparently has several different options.  Entirely your call.”

Christine and Paula pause at that, and get back to drinking.

Of course, the more they drink, the less their inhibitions apply.  I wonder which route they’ll take?  Myself, I don’t have their hangups.  Hmm… who’s looking at me… I scan the room with Blindsight - no need for me to turn my head… just guys, huh?  Eh, I don’t have the same concerns with pregnancy - I’m on a Block the Seed spell - but I don’t think I’m quite ready for that … I do find I’m a lot less averse to the idea than I was on my first day.  Huh.  Well… individual people change, it’s kind of a defining characteristic, even.

With no prospects I like, and being largely unaffected by alcohol myself, I eventually take my leave, casting a quick Interplanar Telepathic Bond on Wendy, and booking a private room in the pub. No, I don’t plan to sleep there, but I want to keep up appearances.

I go up to my room, and… blech. OK, yes, it's a private room… but it's a drafty wooden room, the bed is apparently just a sheet over some straw in a frame, and I don't want to think about what that bronze pot is for. But it has room enough for what I'm actually here for.

I cast Fairy Ring Retreat, and get my circle of mushrooms. Walking into the middle of it, I find myself transported to a quiet meadow in a grove… which was exactly the plan. A Mage's Private Sanctum spell stops possible eavesdropping… not that there is much hope of that, with Mind Blank on me and my being on a brand new plane, with the fairy ring now invisible and locked tight as per the spell description… but I'm keeping to the Druid spell theme for now, just in case.

As for why I'm here? Well… I haven't had a good opportunity to really look at myself. Yes, I saw a bit in the water… but that's not a proper mirror.  Which I can make, now.  One quick Major Creation later, and I am looking at a full body mirror.

I want to see my base form, so I take a moment to wash off the disguise (Create Water is handy for that), and look myself over.

My tanned skin is smooth; I can’t find a single blemish. My nose is perfectly centered, reasonably average sized. My hair is a long and smooth black which largely covers my ears. My eyes are a very dark brown, practically black, giving me something of an appearance of always being ‘interested’. My shoulders are quite narrow, and my arms are thin. Having seen several other people, I'm quite certain that I am very short. I am quite slender, not carrying an ounce of fat… well, except in ‘all the right places’ - my milk makers (currently dry, thankfully) are individually about the size of my head, and my slender waist balloons out to the sides and back into a caboose that demands attention. The dress I’m wearing is a dark blue with gold trim, and yes, a window into my ample cleavage.  The skirt is long, and I'm wearing shorts underneath. My shoes are simple dark blue flats with gold trim to match the rest.

I make myself some equipment - a masterwork backpack, four spell component pouches (may as well seem to need them), a Thieves' Ring, and a set of Masterwork Thieves' tools, an adamantine scimitar, a blue dragonhide large steel shield, a composite longbow set for my buffed strength, a quiver full of adamantine arrows, and also a Druid's Holly and Mistletoe. Summon Monster VI a few times gives me the requisite number of Hound Archons (1d4+1 from the summon Monster IV list, maximized via Divine Providence), which I empower for Circle Magic via repeated uses of Create Proxy. I have them all power me up, and use a suite of caster level boosting to get 9th level spells at a caster level of twenty. Hmm… tasty.

I then go to town with buff spells, including empowering the mundane objects: There's a lot of spells that apply to weapons and shields, and even some that apply to the backpack!  I also make new armor and weapons for Paula and Christine the same way, including a Mithril buckler for Wendy.

Of course, that still leaves me with a few hours to kill.  I dismiss the summons and strip down. I want to get a good look at myself in my mirror.

I'm warming up just looking at myself. I'm apparently quite the shortstack. All my skin is perfectly smooth, my skin tone perfectly even, and not a single hair below my luxurious eyelashes. I'm not quite as exaggerated as Paula - her massively repeated Reincarnates left her pretty unbalanced - but there's no mistaking me for a male at this point.

And I get to watch myself react to my image. My cheeks are flushing, my upper lips are reddening, my lower lips are slowly spreading, and… oh, my spouts are coming to attention. Hmm… feels nice, oh, and I can smell me. Huh. Oh, and I'm slowly starting to drip?  And of course, now I have this hollow feeling that's begging to be filled.

… and Summon Nature's Ally IV can get me a satyr… it’s kind of what they do, isn't it?

… I don't think I'm quite ready for that. Rubber comes from a plant though, right? A rubber tree… I could make a 'friend' … and I have access to Craft(Electronics) via Final Fantasy d20…

Soon enough, I'm holding a simple latex vibrator….