Refusing My God’s Advances

"A real fine way to start off the interaction, don't you think?!" The little man snapped, but I scoffed.

"I have an extra slot, and some half of a half didn't bother to give me his name. For all I know, you are just some bellows boy and a cart pusher who is trying to fill shoes much too big than himself," I replied, making the little man's face go red.

I knew who this was right off the hop, even if I didn't know his race. This was clearly the shop owner, but I had got a clear view of the little man right away. It was almost too easy to read that this guy loved conflict and banter, so I decided to play along with his stubborn act while having a bit of fun.

"My name is on the damn sign, you bloody arsehole!" Argrum snapped at me, and I pulled back, causing the man to fall on his face.

"My apologies. I suggest that you hire someone friendly to manage the front of your shop. You don't seem to have the knack for customer service," I said with a grin, offering a hand to help him up. Argrum slapped it away and stood up on his own, dusting off his beard with a huff.

"I don't need customer service when I have the finest alloys on this side of the divine realms. People come here for quality, not for pleasantries," Argrum retorted, straightening his vest with a prideful puff of his chest.

"Fair enough," I conceded, standing back up. "But since we're on the topic of quality, I'm here to propose an exchange of services. You see, in my previous life, I was known for creating designs that even gods found impeccable. And now, as a Printer Mage turned... Techno something, I've got skills that could benefit your shop in ways you might not have imagined."

Argrum raised an eyebrow, his interest piqued despite his earlier irritation. "And what, pray tell, could a 'Printer Mage turned Techno something' offer to the finest metalworker in the divine realms?"

"Something or another, but first, I am curious to know a bit more about you. Even though you have clearly taken a liking to me," I said.

"Have not."

I ignored Argrum. "because I am so darn great and all, I need to know what making a deal with you entails. You know? If we become all buddy-buddy, what kind of dark caverns are you going to be trying to pull me into later on down the road. A man had to be prepared for all occasions! Even if it is just to protect his Chastity!"

"Yer an idiot," Argrum groaned, slapping his hand over his face, shaking his head, but I could see the corner of a slight grin from under one of his hands. "An idiot, but an entertaining one. Fine. You want to know about the world I rule, and the people that call me their god?"

"Something like that. You actually seem like a pretty good person, so I doubt that you are going to pull me into any crazy conflicts. Still, I am curious to know the answer to those questions. I didn't get to ask Hades before he gave me his approval," I explained, and Argrum gave me a shocked look.

"He already gave you his approval? What could you make him, that he couldn't do better?" Argrum demanded, and I feigned a pain in my heart.

"There you go again. Doubt my work before even giving me a chance! What a wiener!" I declared, still gripping my chest.

"Oh, shad up. What can the great you do for little old me then?" Argrum asked, and I grinned.

"At least you got one thing right!" I laughed, and the little old man crossed his arms and rolled his eyes.

"I am startin' to like you less and less by the moment, boy. Spit it out or get out!" Argrum snapped, and I nodded, standing up.

"I can make all sorts of things almost instantly and I can use up to divine-rated materials. I am sure that isn't that impressive to you, but I can make almost anything from the ISP given time. Weapons, armor, and clothing I can make almost instantly, but the other things require me to set them to print in my reality," I explained, and the little man finally seemed interested.

"Anything?" He asked, and I nodded but narrowed my eyes.

"Don't be asking for anything nefarious, but yes, I can build almost anything available to me at my current level. I am sure when I get around to doing my class change, I will have more options," I explained, not wanting to make a love doll for this little weirdo.

"I need someone to process ore in the shop and run it while I am away. Dwarfs are notoriously nasty creatures, so even the golems we make have bad attitudes. I can't argue with you when you say I should have someone else up here, but I am about as nice as a Dwarf comes," Argrum explained, and my eyes narrowed again.

"So, you are a Dwarf? With those slitted eyes, I thought you might've been part cat or something. Did you get those from staring too long into the forge or is that just the latest fashion in Dwarf world?" I teased, knowing full well I was treading on thin ice, but the situation seemed too ripe for banter to pass up.

Argrum let out a hearty laugh, the sound echoing through the cavernous shop like a series of small explosions. "Part cat, you say? That's a new one. But no, lad. These eyes are the result of centuries of working with the finest and most volatile materials on this side of the cosmos. A gift, you might say, from the gods themselves. Makes it easier to see the true quality of the metals I work with."

"I see. So, essentially, you're a metalworking cat-Dwarf with an eye for quality and a short fuse for customer service. Got it," I nodded, trying to keep a straight face. The absurdity of the conversation wasn't lost on me, but I was starting to enjoy the back-and-forth.